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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Gibberings CLXXX - one hundred and eiiiiiiiiiighty!

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Well I'm glad you vaguely listened, TD, and some sort of thought process has gone into it, at least. Albeit a PV-ey thought process.. keep checking in so that people know you're okay, yeah?
 
Well at the end of the day I haven't died yet, I know you only get one shot at that though.I've always been one to read up about new chems, start low at first and use scales and liquid measuring at all times when appropriate. Apart from my mess up last night and xanax power eyeballing once when younger (both one offs so far) I have always considered my drug use and combo's to be very safe/forgiving on myself personally. I still ask when not sure but will also act if very sure. I just have limits to my HR like everyone does. I hope you don't think me foolish, given everything I said, read, took on board and still decided it was worth the (tiny) risk as I saw it.
 
A couple of mates dropped in out of the blue and had a free impromto crack, heroin, vokda and redbull little sesh nice since im broke and was unexpected. When i buy drugs i always return the favour im not a moocher. Their just gone and left me the vodka sound blokes :) feel grand
 
Yay that did the trick almost instant relaxing waves replacing the jaggedness I was feeling and stiffness replaced with warm, legs/limbs unclenching, no cramps since I took it (I would be pleased if they stopped totally, they were almost as annoying as the overtimed feeling I had for best part of a day:S Like like toes and feet would lock into place and be incredibly painful to get out/stop them returning to cramped up position. All self inflected all so unnecessary. Had I not wrongly thought one bag of chems was another. I m still bit twitchy but will wait and see if that goes/I can live with it rather than take more ODT as soon as I said I would.

I feel so much better already :) woot! Go me listening to myself! although most of you guys! Famous last words, maybe I shouldn't cheer its over so soon incase I do die. Then I'd look really foolish and be a proper poster kid for drugs, but also a poster kid for what happens if you don't listen entirely to BLs HR advice. This could be you, holds up photo of the rotting tangerine.

I've seen my best best dead I'm allowed to make fun, shut up! It's a coping mechanism, although what he would have wanted too, as is not ruining my mums £1000 custom rug :/ Might bill his rents, its been a year now, they are probably over it. he was over it. seriously though, I don't mean to sound cold or heartless but thats the way I am so that's how it comes out!

Nah I miss him loads still obviously, always will I think. So much so I'd trade my mums 3000 custom rug for his life. I loved him that much :(

I'm calming down almost totally now. Almost too calm, shit its Pevee time again! or maybe MXE time? Or beer or diclaz. I choose ALL. I learned nothing! Woo yeah. But I am putting far more time into each post, does it show? Especially the apparent lack of care and consideration for my self loved ones and all your opinions! Ouch, one tiny cramp, thats all I get?

But seriously y'all, thanks for the advice both the advice I took and didn't ;) This isn't sarcasm, I may have taken some MXE if I hadn't asked here first, which may have been a mistake. Thanks for all your help today, and mainly putting up with my entirely unplanned but stupidly occurring peeve OD. There was a point I was worrying about the duration. I wonder if I'll ever know how long it would have taken to ware off without the ODT. I don't care, yay drugs solve all of drugs problems, it's like I always thought (everything in my life has kead me to that one conclusion tbh) if by drugs curing drugs I mean killing the user stopping them from feeling the drugs that is :s I really should be more careful in future. That could have been far more disastrous than it was already. Now I am finally feeling somewhat sober (well slightly opiated up, near enough compared to the living, writhing, screaming hell (slight overstatement) I went though over past day) I can appreciate just how stupid and lucky I was not to have mixed up say, 2cb with mxe, or something worse :S I did learn my lesson, really. Most sarcasm aside, I really appreciate being alive :) Cheers again for the help you guys. Much appreciated :D Sometimes I think life would be easier without drugs, you know. But then I take some drugs and the voices stop ;) only temporarily though. I should try harder I know.

All jokes or attempts at jokes aside, I do need a self imposed break. It's got a bit out of hand lately again. Talking about before the peeve incident :o
 
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I feel stiff again! and like the ODT is wearing off in other ways :( Oh noes. Theres only one thing left to do at times like this. Rue and lament my stupid action yesterday again and fall off hopefully into a deep sleep if that fails after a while... I may have to eat more drugs.
 
@ TD. Hmmm maybe you should have stuck with the booze and blues for trying to relieve that tension. i have been in a similar (albeit much less severe) senario where i was trying to relieve trachcardia and muscle tension i picked heroin and alcohol instead of just taking a load of benzos...the result was little reliefe of the tension and me too scared to take benzos for fear of oding when not in "my right mind" whatever that means. much love to ya anyway man im glad your alright. BTW you got anyone to keep an eye on you? just peeve has a knack for derailing all sensible trains of thought. keep us updated.

@ acieed_ed. Hello mate hope your doin alright. iv been reading your posts man and i have to say its hard for me to read them, i know when your in a fucked state of mind your self value goes out the window and you just think fuck it...i know i hope yo have a mate or a relative or someone you can trust if you feel as if your going of the rails again mate, if nothin else you can pm me for a chat. Fucking scandelis about your head shrink tellin your doctor to pull your meds! even if she has cracking tits thats an astoundingly bad peice of medical practice.
Anyway i wanted to ask you....i keep reading that you bump into mates who give you a few pipes or a bag on strap, which is sound, but how do you keep up with what you owe you doin alright for cash or you husslin? dont answer if you dont want to mate im just curious as id be in a bad place soon as if i sraped haldf as much as you.
 
I AM STILL HERE, awake (and alive. just very tired out but still wired. Had no idea peeves could last so long) I haven't had anything else since I took the 35mg ODT, which must have been 3 or 4 hours ago now maybe more. I may move onto my last 2 ciders and see where they leave me. No one to watch me but myself and my sock puppet who is really my hand in drag. What's this about peevee trailing sensitive trains of what now? I am fine honestly. Just because I accidentally injected myself with a large amount of the wrong drug doesn't mean I'm not clever normally! Also I know your cat didn't vote. I appreciate your concern the same way a spider-crab appreciates not being boiled alive. Don't worry I'll keep us updated :)
 
Morning EADD,

Well I'm taking the lack of reply from Tangerine as positive... hopefully he managed to find his way into a somewhat peaceful, if haunted by shadow people slumber.

I was very tempted to get some heroin for the start of next week but I think I'm going to hold off. Today would be the last day I could acquire the necessary funds being as my debit card runs out. New one never turned up despite the fact I got a new credit card from the same bank, so bit irritating until I get it sorted. :!

Really should have sorted out by now but ah well... not had any erroneous transactions on my account, so not worried it's been swiped but still.
 
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You're into smack, Chatative? I thought you were sounding like such a good ol' wholesome boy.
I wouldn't advise H if you're struggling with depression and don't have a job.
Sorry for this non-post, I just couldn't pass up this chance to HR-ass a moderator :-)
 
I've tried it twice like 3 months ago but I can't fault you for taking up the opportunity to HR-ass a mod. ;)

I'm not struggling with depression though but in many ways it still wouldn't be wise, which is exactly why I am holding off. Slippery slope it is and all...
 
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Chatative said:
I've tried it twice like 3 months ago but I can't fault you for taking up the opportunity to HR-ass a mod. ;)

I'm not struggling with depression though but in many ways it still wouldn't be wise, which is exactly why I am holding off. Slippery slope it is and all...
Click to expand...

My apologies for jumping to a conclusion there. I'm but a casual EADD'er.

I've only had a few bags of H, in 2012, and liked it. Since then whenever I think of the best buzz I could attain I'm listing heroin up there every time. It's everywhere in this town and cheap too, strong 0.2g bags for 10 euro. Would be very simple to casually grab a few of those (if not as simple as mailorder).
 
No problem, depression was never something that came up when I was seeing my CPN but I'm perfectly willing to accept I might have developed mild depression on top of other things. I had a look over the Beck's Depression Inventory & it came back as mild depression. Will be seeing CPN again sometime soon so I guess that topic of conversation will come up.

Yeah that's the thing, heroin just seemed like a very dependable high... something you could get used to, never mind the addiction side of things. That's why I've left it 3 months, still playing with fire in some respects but I figure leaving long periods between small sessions will reduce the risk somewhat.
 
Fuck it... just bought myself a ticket to a an Event up The Rainbow for tomorrow night, i need to blow some steam off and im gonna do it in fuckin style.. =D

Acid+MDMA+LOUD MUSIC im gonna be the wildest cunt going...!

Im going PRIMAL

Then rehab.. okay ;)
 
afternoooooon everyone!

Planning a moderately fucked up weekend... cant be too far gone as ivo got some work responsabilities to cover but by jove im going to party anyway. if there was ever a reason to use amps, its to party and work the next day occasionally...

scotchmist - ever hear of these?
Le Whaf Makes Cloudy Cocktails
 
Cant say i have.. nice to look at, cant see me bothering to get one tbh, im a fuckin junkie, calories dont bother me man... ;)

Enjoy you ampy weekend MrKing
 
nah man, not amped up yet :) thats for tonight and tomorrow! :D
i was just asking as when i first saw your username thats what i was thinking of... a mist of scotch! :P
 
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