General Heroin #19 v. Posting Between the Nods

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It's ok bluehues if we are being no honest I think most every guy has fucked a swamp donkey at least once in life. Nothing to be ashamed of I mean fat girls need loving too right? Look at it like a humanitarian mission you probably made that girls month!

On a more personal note I'm going to rehab in south Florida at the end of the week. My parents wouldn't pay for more suboxone so I was like fuck it a trip to summer camp doesn't sound too bad. This place waived my 2500 dollar insurance deductible as well so it's basically free to me except the plane tickets to get there! Place sounds nice to its one of only 30 non 12 step rehabs in the country apperantly. On the beach play paintball on the weekends a live in chef. I told my mom that maybe getting addicted to heroin wasn't such a bad idea after all lol. Insurance is paying for a 40 thousand dollar vacation!

I am scared about this kick though I know coming off five years of suboxone is going to be rough but they claim to have experience making people comfortable but so does every other detox. But I guess if I gotta be sick a beach in south Florida is the best place!

I'm going tommorow to get my last high and flying out Thursday so ill be around a couple more days. But you guys are the best I really love the support and honesty I get in these forums!
Good luck man. Shooting people with paintballs would make me feel better too. Gets out some of that aggression and anxiety of withdrawal. Let me know the name of it I plan on going to south Florida in a few years I may end a good rehab that hopefully takes my insurance.
 
It's ok bluehues if we are being no honest I think most every guy has fucked a swamp donkey at least once in life. Nothing to be ashamed of I mean fat girls need loving too right? Look at it like a humanitarian mission you probably made that girls month!

On a more personal note I'm going to rehab in south Florida at the end of the week. My parents wouldn't pay for more suboxone so I was like fuck it a trip to summer camp doesn't sound too bad. This place waived my 2500 dollar insurance deductible as well so it's basically free to me except the plane tickets to get there! Place sounds nice to its one of only 30 non 12 step rehabs in the country apperantly. On the beach play paintball on the weekends a live in chef. I told my mom that maybe getting addicted to heroin wasn't such a bad idea after all lol. Insurance is paying for a 40 thousand dollar vacation!

I am scared about this kick though I know coming off five years of suboxone is going to be rough but they claim to have experience making people comfortable but so does every other detox. But I guess if I gotta be sick a beach in south Florida is the best place!

I'm going tommorow to get my last high and flying out Thursday so ill be around a couple more days. But you guys are the best I really love the support and honesty I get in these forums!

good luck cj.I hope it all works out for ya
 
It's ok bluehues if we are being no honest I think most every guy has fucked a swamp donkey at least once in life. Nothing to be ashamed of I mean fat girls need loving too right? Look at it like a humanitarian mission you probably made that girls month!

On a more personal note I'm going to rehab in south Florida at the end of the week. My parents wouldn't pay for more suboxone so I was like fuck it a trip to summer camp doesn't sound too bad. This place waived my 2500 dollar insurance deductible as well so it's basically free to me except the plane tickets to get there! Place sounds nice to its one of only 30 non 12 step rehabs in the country apperantly. On the beach play paintball on the weekends a live in chef. I told my mom that maybe getting addicted to heroin wasn't such a bad idea after all lol. Insurance is paying for a 40 thousand dollar vacation!

I am scared about this kick though I know coming off five years of suboxone is going to be rough but they claim to have experience making people comfortable but so does every other detox. But I guess if I gotta be sick a beach in south Florida is the best place!

I'm going tommorow to get my last high and flying out Thursday so ill be around a couple more days. But you guys are the best I really love the support and honesty I get in these forums!

If I didn't have so much going on I wouldn't mind doing the same. Your kick won't be as mad since you will be in a place where you know you can't get anything. Just try to stick to the short acting opiates between now and then so the bupe will be out of your system more when you go there.
 
Thanks for the kind words guys. I'm kinda bummed that I may not get my last high before I go due to family not understanding how important saying goodbye is to me not relapsing later. I keep telling myself that heroin is not going anywhere it'll be around when I get out if I need it but its making me an anxious wreck. On top of that my super codependent mother is insisting to drive me the 10 hours instead of flying so she can check the place out. I'm like wtf I'm 25 a supposedly grown ass adult I can handle my own fucking life. I need a change so bad guys my life makes me so depressed. I just want to be my own man but I have no idea how to accomplish that. Anyway sorry to bitch it's just frustrating.

Edit. I'm sorry to vent this here I know you guys and girls have problems of your own. I just feel like my head is on fire and no one in my real life understands. So thanks for reading and caring it really does mean a lot.
 
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Thanks for the kind words guys. I'm kinda bummed that I may not get my last high before I go due to family not understanding how important saying goodbye is to me not relapsing later. I keep telling myself that heroin is not going anywhere it'll be around when I get out if I need it but its making me an anxious wreck. On top of that my super codependent mother is insisting to drive me the 10 hours instead of flying so she can check the place out. I'm like wtf I'm 25 a supposedly grown ass adult I can handle my own fucking life. I need a change so bad guys my life makes me so depressed. I just want to be my own man but I have no idea how to accomplish that. Anyway sorry to bitch it's just frustrating.

Edit. I'm sorry to vent this here I know you guys and girls have problems of your own. I just feel like my head is on fire and no one in my real life understands. So thanks for reading and caring it really does mean a lot.
They will never understand why no one will unless they have been an addict. Your mom probably just wants to make sure you go and don't skip out on it. I would take that as a sign that she loves you and really cares about you. If I was in your shoes my parents would want to drive me too not so much as they don't trust me but to spend time with me and to make sure I didn't accidentaly od trying for that last hurrah before detox. So to summarize I think your mom just loves you and wants you to be allrite and I hope you get through this too. Godspeed old friend.
 
Thanks for the kind words guys. I'm kinda bummed that I may not get my last high before I go due to family not understanding how important saying goodbye is to me not relapsing later. I keep telling myself that heroin is not going anywhere it'll be around when I get out if I need it but its making me an anxious wreck. On top of that my super codependent mother is insisting to drive me the 10 hours instead of flying so she can check the place out. I'm like wtf I'm 25 a supposedly grown ass adult I can handle my own fucking life. I need a change so bad guys my life makes me so depressed. I just want to be my own man but I have no idea how to accomplish that. Anyway sorry to bitch it's just frustrating.

Edit. I'm sorry to vent this here I know you guys and girls have problems of your own. I just feel like my head is on fire and no one in my real life understands. So thanks for reading and caring it really does mean a lot.

I know the feeling, man. You just gotta take it one day and one change at a time. Fake it till you make it kind of thing. Get the image of you who yourself, who you really want to be, in your head, and focus on that. Then start making choices one at a time to get you closer to that man, and eventually, you will become him.

I know it can feel like you'll never get where you want to be and be happy, but it is attainable man. It just takes effort and drive, but you'll get there. You're taking the first step right now.

Good luck, brother.
 
goodluck crimson,i will be praying for you,your 25 yrs old,u can have an awesome life,alot of time on your,side.
 
Crimson please fill us in on all your 'hab adventures when you return, its interesting to see what other rehabs are like. Best of luck man if you havent already left yet.
 
Just wanted to share this with you guys, a good way to clear up your skin so you don't have track marks is to put neosporin on in the morning and at night ever since I've been doing this my skin has cleared up dramatically and I barely have any marks at all.
 
eucerin is your friend tomatalli
EUC-63382-1.jpg
 
^Thanks for posting those tips, summer is coming and some of us want to be able to wear short sleeves. Vitamin E is also great a great track mark cure/preventer I've found.
 
So went to court again today. Pleaded down the 4 felonies to just 1, 6 months in jail and 5 years probation. But, thankfully the judge and the DA agreed to consider straight probation. So sentencing is in 2 months. Within that time, I get interviewed by the probation department, etc, show them the recommendations from the methadone clinic, my outpatient, my job, whatnot, and then hopefully they agree to just probation instead of any jail time at all.
 
I'll look into eucerin, I've tried other intensive repair lotions and nothing has worked as good as neosporinit started to work within a day
 
So went to court again today. Pleaded down the 4 felonies to just 1, 6 months in jail and 5 years probation. But, thankfully the judge and the DA agreed to consider straight probation. So sentencing is in 2 months. Within that time, I get interviewed by the probation department, etc, show them the recommendations from the methadone clinic, my outpatient, my job, whatnot, and then hopefully they agree to just probation instead of any jail time at all.

5 years prob. is a mofo.If they suspend the six mo. are they gonna add to the 5 years prob.?
 
I just had to poke myself for a half hour and I couldn't hit for some reason. I changed the needle and I hit on the first try. Do some needles just suck?
 
^Thanks for posting those tips, summer is coming and some of us want to be able to wear short sleeves. Vitamin E is also great a great track mark cure/preventer I've found.

Pumice stone used for callouses helps too.It gently scrapes the outer skin layer and little by little fades the scars. Sold in most pharmacies in the skin care section right next to the Eucerin.
 
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