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  • EADD Moderators: Shambles

European Heroin Discussion v We like noise, it's our choice (v.17)

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I don't even think I want to Shambles. I just feel like giving up. These past couple of years have been a constant trial, I've lost so many people and I've had so much fucked up shit done to me and I'm just not me anymore. I feel like I've been broken.
Fuck I'm not making any sense, I dunno, I'm just sick of fighting for nothing I guess.
 
It's not for nothing though is it, Pagey? We all know what chronic heroin addiction means - it really ain't no fun at all. Well, bits of it are but mostly it's shithouse. You think too many people around you are dying now? As you can probably imagine - expect that number to rise exponentially if you go in for outright junkydom :|

In purely practical terms, how do you think you're gonna fund a £100+ habit a day? Doesn't take much to get there if heroin is what you want. You gonna be able to stay at Uni? Still find time to write? Find time to do anything at all other than constantly needing to find money for gear at any cost? And be sick as fuck half the time anyway cos it's nigh-on impossible sometimes to keep a habit going what with unreliable product, unreliable dealers, police harrassment and so forth. It really is no kinda life worth having.

If things are really that bad and you simply cannot wait for proper medication then there's always the option of getting on a methadone/subutex script. Smoothes over the very roughest of rough edges of addiction but comes with its own lil issues too. You would at least be getting pain meds that might actually work - admittedly for the wrong reasons - but is better than a poke in the eye. You can say goodbye to ever getting legit pain treatment though - unless you don't mind waiting a decade or two.

Hobson's choice really, but there are at least some alternatives open to you. It's just that they're all a bit shit, I know :\
 
Not posted for a while. I had been scoring off the same fella since the drought, but lately his gear was getting stamped all over, not even getting a rush or buzz off it. So I've spewed him, and should have done it months ago, cos the lad I'm getting it off now is a old mate from my pot head days and the gear is fucking unreal.
Hope everyone is doing ok. I hate having to go out in the snow scoring.....
 
Shambles said:
It's not for nothing though is it, Pagey? We all know what chronic heroin addiction means - it really ain't no fun at all. Well, bits of it are but mostly it's shithouse. You think too many people around you are dying now? As you can probably imagine - expect that number to rise exponentially if you go in for outright junkydom :|

In purely practical terms, how do you think you're gonna fund a £100+ habit a day? Doesn't take much to get there if heroin is what you want. You gonna be able to stay at Uni? Still find time to write? Find time to do anything at all other than constantly needing to find money for gear at any cost? And be sick as fuck half the time anyway cos it's nigh-on impossible sometimes to keep a habit going what with unreliable product, unreliable dealers, police harrassment and so forth. It really is no kinda life worth having.

If things are really that bad and you simply cannot wait for proper medication then there's always the option of getting on a methadone/subutex script. Smoothes over the very roughest of rough edges of addiction but comes with its own lil issues too. You would at least be getting pain meds that might actually work - admittedly for the wrong reasons - but is better than a poke in the eye. You can say goodbye to ever getting legit pain treatment though - unless you don't mind waiting a decade or two.

Hobson's choice really, but there are at least some alternatives open to you. It's just that they're all a bit shit, I know :\
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You've got a way with words my man.
 
Well I haven't had much experience with heroin addiction. But I've never met anyone that regrets not doing more heroin.

I'm at a bit of crossroads myself with heroin use. I've been chipping for the last two years (using weekly for the last year) and I finally got caught by my parents, who found a n empty bag and did a drug test on me without my knowledge. They want me to be remorseful but I'm finding it difficult - heroin has yet to cause me any trouble - and the only thing I do regret is them finding out because not only has it had serious repercussions for me (forced to move back home and commute to uni, lost all control of my money, not allowed to visit friends' places) but I also feel extremely guilty because I know how disappointed they are with me and how much stress it has caused them. But I'm not going to concede that what I was doing was dangerous. Stupid, maybe, but I never took risks (always smoked, never mixed, moderated use, etc). I don't really know what to do now. I like heroin and see no reason to stop using, but at the same time I can still live without it.
 
Yes your lack of experience certainly does shows. With regards to your opening statement.

Well one reason to stop is the very high chance you will get a full blown addiction. Stop whilst you can.
 
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barbs are routinely bashed in to gear at source - and the amount of benzos as a cut in poor gear is now practically guarnteed - my doc does NHS work as well as private and he told me in central london where he does his clinic between 80/90% of tests come up + for benzos from people who dont take them- its easy to tell as a benzo cut if its high enough (and it useually is) basically makes you sleep not that proper gouch that I think many have forgottrn what its like,.....you know that semi conscious state like youve just woken up and you slip in and out of.
dunno if i had an a/c i woulkd go down the silk rd route - there was a write up on iyt in this sat's Guarduan
 
in the 30 years of using i have had more enjoyment than not but thats cos i have nearly always had the cash to have a habit i dont have any diseases and look 20 younger than i should do - i think they should give it away on the NHS.
heroin addiction is something you need to be able to deal with on its own terms if you cant them you end up in shit pie - and i have had a few of those moments
 
Hi Class-A-Team! :) Please look after yourself. All of the gear been sold in Ireland the last two years is only half the strength of the gear that was around before the drought. In my books the gear been sold now in Ireland is not even real gear. I have scored all over Dublin, everywhere, but the very same weak gear is been sold everywhere. Sometimes I'll find gear that is a bit better or a bit worse, but none of it holds a candle to the proper gear that was around before the drought.

But if and when the real gear comes back you'll know all about it. You'll be strung out & using daily in a matter of weeks. So keep in mind that the gear your using now has hardly any of the effects of real heroin, that is why you can control your habit. If you were using proper heroin then you'd loose control of your habit quickly. Before the drought I used a half 8th daily, I couldn't live with out it. But now with the weak gear I have much better control, that is why I only use twice every two weeks now. Look after yourself coz if the quality of gear improves then it will grab a hold of you the same way that it grabs everyone else.....

Hi Everyone! :) Kat will be home on Wednesday!!! YAY! It will be great to have her back on-line! :)
 
Its funny how having had a habit for christ knows how long, but always eating, working etc keeps you looking young. I had my 40th the other week, but was told by numerous people that i only look about 28. I put it down to all stress and agro just dissapearing when youve had gear.
And whats been said about people forgeting what a proper gear gouch is like is true. The shit i was getting before xmas was knocking me out and i was feeling pretty satisfied with it, but since mid january when really nice gear came back on the scene i realised what a load of tosh i had been getting. And the gear that is going around now is absolute fucking dynamite, I swear even before the drought atntenyone would have been made up to get this stuff. Ive had a long weekend off work, and been wasted since friday. After seeing me just after having a hit, even the mrs said she hasnt seen me in that state for a long long time, rushes and scratching like a flea bitten mutt.
 
thattoh said:
Its funny how having had a habit for christ knows how long, but always eating, working etc keeps you looking young. I had my 40th the other week, but was told by numerous people that i only look about 28. I put it down to all stress and agro just dissapearing when youve had gear.
And whats been said about people forgeting what a proper gear gouch is like is true. The shit i was getting before xmas was knocking me out and i was feeling pretty satisfied with it, but since mid january when really nice gear came back on the scene i realised what a load of tosh i had been getting. And the gear that is going around now is absolute fucking dynamite, I swear even before the drought atntenyone would have been made up to get this stuff. Ive had a long weekend off work, and been wasted since friday. After seeing me just after having a hit, even the mrs said she hasnt seen me in that state for a long long time, rushes and scratching like a flea bitten mutt.
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Ay up matey;

May I ask how much you are paying for said gear? Is it £10 a point?

Interesting wot ur saying about looking young cos I too as an addict of only around 8 years or so, look too young for 32. Ive been turned down for booze in the last year in Asda! I look younger when I shave, luckily my stubbles quite thick after a couple days so Ive got the choice between youthful looks and looking late 20's! If only I werent such an ugly hick! I did hear heroin slows the aging process but dunno when / where/ if its complete bull.
 
ructions said:
Hi Class-A-Team! :) Please look after yourself. All of the gear been sold in Ireland the last two years is only half the strength of the gear that was around before the drought. In my books the gear been sold now in Ireland is not even real gear. I have scored all over Dublin, everywhere, but the very same weak gear is been sold everywhere. Sometimes I'll find gear that is a bit better or a bit worse, but none of it holds a candle to the proper gear that was around before the drought.

But if and when the real gear comes back you'll know all about it. You'll be strung out & using daily in a matter of weeks. So keep in mind that the gear your using now has hardly any of the effects of real heroin, that is why you can control your habit. If you were using proper heroin then you'd loose control of your habit quickly. Before the drought I used a half 8th daily, I couldn't live with out it. But now with the weak gear I have much better control, that is why I only use twice every two weeks now. Look after yourself coz if the quality of gear improves then it will grab a hold of you the same way that it grabs everyone else.....

Hi Everyone! :) Kat will be home on Wednesday!!! YAY! It will be great to have her back on-line! :)
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Hi Ructs glad to hear ur keeping well. Thats fkn brilliant Kats gettin out. I wonder if she'll be wanting to use on release? Good luck to her either way, I imagine she might want to give abstinence a go on the outside, and if she does, she'd be well advised to avoid this thread imo. Pleased for her though hope she's come out a stronger person for her sake and has used the cuntish situation she's been put in to her advantage, if thats possible
 
blondin said:
barbs are routinely bashed in to gear at source - and the amount of benzos as a cut in poor gear is now practically guarnteed - my doc does NHS work as well as private and he told me in central london where he does his clinic between 80/90% of tests come up + for benzos from people who dont take them- its easy to tell as a benzo cut if its high enough (and it useually is) basically makes you sleep not that proper gouch that I think many have forgottrn what its like,.....you know that semi conscious state like youve just woken up and you slip in and out of.
dunno if i had an a/c i woulkd go down the silk rd route - there was a write up on iyt in this sat's Guarduan
Click to expand...

How do you know? Any evidence? I'm not being argumentative you may well be right, but I must've had in excess of 100 dirty piss tests in 6 years or so of treatment, and not a single one has come up positive for benzo's. Obviously I'm not prescribed any, nor use them on my own terms ever. First time I was aware of it happening was since the drought, but not on a particularly widespread level IME / areas I've lived / used in. Maybe Westcountry gear's better than the tac u get in the big smoke? Or maybe ur ldn dealers are that bit more cunning in cutting their product with shite?
 
I'm paying £10 for about .15-.2 the guy who I've just found is unbelievable, like I said before its like the late 90's gear and size too. Couldn't believe it...
 
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