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If you died today

A lot of people often talk to me about their problems and say that I really help them by being a person to talk to, this is people I know in real life and internet friends a like so I think a lot of people would miss me. I've always tried to be friendly with people so I have a lot of friends who are really good friends.
 
Good thread I think this is important for a lot of addicts / depressed people to consider.

My parents are old, it would probably kill them if I died. I was "their baby" as they put it, youngest son, and I'm the only one having real problems
with my life.

They need to see me succeed and be happy before they die, so if I died now, Id feel like i'm taking the whole essence and roots of my family down
with me.

I use to be an inspiring, contagious person to be around, and I think thats what they all miss the most. My unrelenting drive to face things head on, deal
with problems effectively, now I get down about things... that person I use to be, it was a really stressful life trying to be strong all the time.

Thats why losing grip on your life can sometimes feel good. It can feel like a relief at first, then eventually it feels more like a prison you can't escape.

If I died tommorow, lots of people would miss me. As much as I hate to believe people love me, they do. As much as I feel I'm not worthy, I am.

As much as I don't want to get off drugs, I WILL.

-Bo
 
Lost Ego said:
Who would miss you? My first impulse when i just asked myself this question was nobody but i'm inclined to find a few names to deter sadness.

My mom and my sister. i doubt any/many friends(or anybody else) would genuinely care for long...
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Agreed..doubt any1 would miss me eithr..I'd miss a few but no1 would miss me, least not very long..
 
my family might a bit, but i think overall most people wouldnt care or notice.
 
glitter_kiss said:
my family might a bit, but i think overall most people wouldnt care or notice.
Click to expand...

What causes you to feel that "most people" would not care?
Who are the "most people" you speak of?
I would care. You don't say much but when you do, it's real. I like reading your posts. I would care.
 
Some of the best things in life just have not happened yet. My husband and I jumped thru hoops of fire to be together and 2 years after we were married I was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. It is deemed incurable. We can't have kids. I like to think that there is a bigger meaning to life.

So to answer your question my husband and immediate family I think would be devastated by losing me as I am 35 years old. My life expectancy is 2 more years but I do not plan to be a statistic.

Being real though, life does go on. I am sure my husband would remarry at some point and have a family.

Honestly, just accept life. It sucks most times but there is a point to it. It's not a coincidence that millions share similar near death experiences. My friend told me when we die we go home and get to leave this place.
 
1) My cat, maybe? But are cats really that aloof or do they care? My mother would continue to feed and take care of it so alliances will change, perhaps and I will be forgotten about in a day or two.

2) A man in Minneapolis who claims to love me so much he didn't get married a few years ago because he thought there was "hope". We hadn't spoke in 10 years - no reason, just lost touch until we FaceBooked each other. (What made him think THAT?, by the way?)

3) My drug dealers. They'd miss the money.

4) Quite possibly a man with the initial G who is a very good friend (i had lunch with him yesterday and yeah, he'd throw a concert to help with burial expenses or somesuch for sure.

I think that's it. My mother and sister are greedy See You Next Tuesdays and would be glad to see me gone and get my cut of the inheritance. My father is dead. Over the years I've written people off who i had considered "best friends" for lying, cheating, stealing. So I don't have alot of people in my life who are close. I am quite a legendary party girl/traveling hipster type and know people all over the States and even in places like London. So yeah, I know boatloads of folks, but none of them would miss me. They'd toast me once in a while. But would they care? Naaah. "It's a shame. Gwen was fun and used to pass around xanax to everybody!"

At this point I'm just trying to outlive my mother so I'll get the money and be able to travel and stuff. Right now the economy has bent me over and screwed me. I can't even get a bank account because I owe the bank 2 grand. Yikes!

And have I made a positive effect on the world? Have I contributed to the good of society? No. Sadly, I don't believe I have.

But there is always hope. Or else there'd be no reason at all, would there?
Gwennie
 
My mother, my partner, my friend Alex ..

Apart from that I'd be quickly forgotten. Quite sad to think about really :/
 
Coming from someone who almost successfully tried to kill myself when I thought my kids would be better off without me and no-one else would care.
When I came round I realised how wrong I was, my big strong father cried, my mother seemed to have aged 20 years, my nana was worried sick, my grandad had been admitted to the same hospital as the stress had caused him not to eat and his blood sugar had dropped dangerously low for a diabetic.
I live with the guilt constantly that my entire close family are concerned I'm going to wake up 1 morning in that frame of mind and attempt suicide again and this time succeed.
Luckily my youngest son has no knowledge of this attempt, but my eldest, and this I will NEVER forgive myself for, needs constant reassurance mama's not going to heaven.
My current circumstances are absolute bollox, but no matter how tough I'm finding it I'll battle on so as to never attempt at taking my life again.
If you feel you can get no lower and life isn't worth it and that no one cares you're wrong, there are people that care more than you know, and would be devastated if you died. Humans don't always show how much we care for one another, but just because we don't show it, doesn't mean we don't feel it.
Life is full of ups and downs - and being bipolar I should know! If you're down and can get no lower, the next phase of your life will be up - hold onto that thought.
If I had been successful at my attempt on my life, my kids would of grown up thinking I didn't love them as I couldn't stick around for them, and nothing could be further from the truth.
If you genuinely have no one, get a dog, and in a matter of weeks you will have a friendship and bond that you won't want to leave behind no matter what difficulties you face.
 
Since my son died my other son is an only child now. I cannot imagine leaving him. I know that I would have lots of people that would miss me because I have chosen to go deep with many people in my life, but mostly I think about my son. I don't worry about dying one bit except for this. I just cannot imagine him continuing on with no parents, no siblings, no cousins. The only positive I can see is that he truly enjoys people so I believe he has the tools he needs to choose his own "family" which is not a bad thing. I hope I live a very long life for him. I want to see him create his own family, whatever that may mean, however he may choose to do that.
 
gotta go sometime...

my grandmother would mourn me. one of my siblings would be at least sad. the rest of my much too large family could give no fucks.
 
My father.

I'm really all he has nowadays, and he is all I have as well. Friends? I honestly only think one friend would be hurt for a while. Everyone though, I can't help but feel would have this overall thought of them seeing it happening sooner or later. I can't help but feel like nobody would really care for long. It might effect them in a sense that it makes them reevaluate friendships and where they are in life, but not an overwhelming sadness for my presence being gone.
 
Probably no one. I can't think of one person who'd notice or even shed a tear at my funeral.
 
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