when you wont kiss someone you would happily fuck its a lack of respect
that is all
This.
It sounds like the person/s you are dealing with is totally removed from themselves and wants to control sex to empower themselves, rather than engage in it as a mutually fullfilling, experience, which is tragic.
Kissing is sensual, sex is sensual - its normal - innate drives and intuitions are often hijacked by industries that try to make profit my mimicking individual's biological needs for survival and well-being ( what hasnt been, eh!), by setting a standard that ensures people disconnect from their intuitive intelligence and submit to the framework of these industries - to secure its proliferation and profit - dont be a fool, go with your own wisdom.
Sex is about engaging and respecting you and your partner's unique, pleasures and boundaries. The oral, genital, anal cavaties are those most open to infection from the environment - obviously, the impetus to screw someone is risky to health. Therefore, kissing, is a great litmus test to judge how respectful a potential SO is with you - although it isnt fool-proof, it is very misguided to think kissing can be omitted from the whole experience and like I mentioned above, is likely, a discomfort based on self-esteem, on the part of the person who is frightened of it ( Albeit not your circus or monkey, to deal with).
Nature has a way to ensure we secure a mate that is worthy of our intimacy. Honour it and yourself!
