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Getting off Oxycodone for good

Welp I'm back, slightly ashamed. I'm officially 3 days off full-agonists (aka been on sub since Sunday). I'm between jobs so now is really the time.

I feel better on day 3 this go round than I did a couple months ago. Days 1 & 2 were spent in bed, and prior to my first sub (and while it was under my tongue) the RLS / restlessness in general had me extremely uncomfortable, pacing, unable to sit still. That freaked me out - I thought I dug my grave deeper. But with the same resolve and a much better situation (no work obligations) I plan to stick to it.

Roll your eyes... I unfortunately deserve it. But here I am, ok on sub 3 days in with no access to oxy and no feelings that I need to cop some. As always, wish me luck please. I feel I've removed enough variables that would cause me to relapse like I did 8 days after stopping previously. Day 3, onward...
 
Of course it is great to hear from people who find lasting success in any of their efforts, it is probably more heart warming actually when people return to their process after a period of difficultly. You get a smile from me :)
 
Thanks tpd, always been one of my champions. This whole thing sucks though lol. Round n round n roundddd in circles. First day took 10mg (6, 2, 2) second day took 10mg (4, 2, 4), third day still haven't taken any. It's been 15 hours since my last dose. Considering taking a 2mg now. Hoping I have the mental fortitude this go round.
 
Have you considered a longer extended detox, so like six months of ORT to add a little extra stability? It would require working with a doctor, but many a hardcore user has benefited from the smoother transition from a well managed extended detox.
 
I have, but I'm gonna go it my own. I've quit for extended times (6+ months) before. The key this time is not succumbing and the lack of connects should I succumb 6 months down the road. Don't wanna live that life anymore.

Quick update - on day 5. Had a strong urge to use yesterday but didn't - put the sub under my tongue instead :) ... haven't taken sub yet today and it's 730pm. Feel pretty good just chillin. Still super lethargic. Started takin L-Tyrosine yesterday - supposed to be a prodrug for dopamine. We'll see how it goes.

My fear is this weekend when everybody wants to go out. Don't wannna be a sub zombie lol. Even 2mg you can't get a buzz off beer and just be normal. Sticking in there though.

My room mate also goes away next week (sun-sun) so even if I slip up this weekend I can get right back in the saddle on Sunday and ride it through the following weekend into the following week. My room mate has no idea I'm withdrawing.. told him I'm sick (and strangely enough I am - which sucks cuz I'm hacking nasty painful phlegm cough but covers my ass that I am indeed sick lol).

But even if I were to slip (and that's not definite cuz who knos what will go on this weekend) I have 2 full weeks of sub without disruption to look forward to (with my room mate being away). Hopefully this week the acute is over, if I have alil slip this weekend I'll spend the next two weeks weaning off sub and normalizing my life (exercising, etc). I also need to start doing shit for work. Wish me luck ya'll.
 
Quick update.. so I was clean last week sun-thurs, relapsed fri-sat, now back on sub sun-wed and planning to continue with the sub.

I am taking ~2mg daily. I somehow got sub pills (rather than strips) and those things are hard to split into perfectly equal pieces. But, I have not taken oxy 8 out of the last 10 days. I feel better.

I think the acute withdrawal is over (even with that 2 day binge). PAWS here I come. I am lethargic, occasionally depressed, occasionally manic, but I am starting to see glimmers of what my life can be and who I really am. I miss me - not blued out me.

I feel gross all the things I should have been doing that's energy and drive had been sapped by opiates. Not that it's too late - I'm still young. But I feel like I'm fuckin rearing to go. That's the paradox - I get frustrated by the lethargy because there's so much I want to do!

I'm also smart enough to understand that this is a feeling that is temporary and I could easily be using in a couple weeks. Keep rooting for me.
 
Update: relapsed (ugh) but attempting again to get and stay clean. I’m on day 6 free of oxy. I’m taking around 2mg sub a day. Yesterday for whatever reason I didn’t feel the need to take sub but the day before I took 4mg. I took 2mg this morning. I’ve learned each successive attempt - what my triggers are, and whether I can face these things without oxy. I’ve found that I can. So wish me luck ppl - they do say third time is the charm ?. 6 days clean and forging forward..!
 
Gosh, I think it took the third raised to the Nth power was what did the trick for me ;)

Not trying to jinx anything, just saying there is no magic number. But the more you can learn from each difficult experience, the easier it will become to bounce back before anything too serious happens and the more able you'll become at preventing anything bad from happening in the first place.

Have you not considered something like buprenorphine or kratom in terms of an extended detox or maintenance to get yourself a little distance from the oxycodone? If it continues being a bit of a rollercoaster down the road, you'll still have alternatives.

Regardless, thanks for updating us. Let us know if/how we can help support you in your process <3
 
The aching and lethargy are very difficult to deal with. Some people need sub maintenance to prevent relapse. If you are heart set on complete abstinence, consider a rapid taper from sub. This stuff binds to your receptors and has such a long half life that if you are on it for a long period of time it is a fucking nightmare to get off of. You stopped 4mg and felt like death. There are people who take 16mg or more a day.

As for the taper schedule I cannot offer advise, but I'm sure the info is out there. I tapered for nearly a year. Oh, and strips are much more effective for this as you can cut to 1/2 or 1/4 mg/ or less. Even after tapering to 1/8th of a mg I was miserable for a long time. A year later opiates never cross my mind. (well, not entirely true)
 
Maybe you should stay on the sub for a while if it's helping
 
I actually have a question about that (sub). How long can I stay on it before becoming dependent? Day 7 officially started with a 4mg sub under my tongue. My plan was to stop taking sub and see what happens (hoping the 4mg will drop me nicely back to earth over the next day or two which will be day 9-10 clean off oxy). I am aware (and scared) of PAWS and know it is realistic that situations may arise where on day 9 I feel depressed or don’t feel like getting out of bed. I hope this doesn’t happen but I’m realistic. Does anyone know how long you can stay on sub before becoming dependent? Not trying to withdraw again if at all possible lol...
 
It depends on the individual, but as a general rule it will take two to four weeks for dependency to begin to develop. The shortest amount of time will be about two weeks, but it takes a month or more for others.

It really sounds like you'd benefit from staying on buprenorphine for a longer period of time. Have you considered an extended detox using buprenoprhine? That means you spend a month or two stabilizing on it and then four to five months tapering off it slowly. That will give you more change for success and finding the support your need outside pharmacotherapy in your early recovery.

Stability is probably the most important thing in early recovery, and many, many an opioid aficionado has benefited more from a six month extended taper than just using it for the acute detox. An extended taper is also useful because it gives you the option of staying on buprenorphine for a longer period of time if you find it's working well for you.

When it comes to detox from buprenorphine dependency, it's all about tapering and comfort meds. With the proper taper and comfort meds the transition off it isn't nearly as difficult as the horror stories people like to promote. They actually have nothing to do with the experience when it is handled appropriately. However it's often left to the patient to organize an effective detox (and get appropriate comfort meds) because most medical professionals have no idea how to organize (or desire help a drug user avoid unnecessary suffering) an effective detox a patient from something like buprenorphine.

So you'll have to be your own advocate if you ever go that route. Actually that goes for any form of substance use disorder, mental health treatment or other medical treatments - it's just doubly so for people associated with the substance use disorder label.

It's amazing how most medical professionals involved in substance use disorder seem to think suffering helps people get into recovery. The "tough love" bullshit at its finest. When it comes to advances in addiction medicine and substance use disorder treatment, it's like the pimple on the ass of time, as I call it.
 
Yeah, I’m just taking it one day at a time. I suffered withdrawal from longer term sub maintenance (3 months at 4mg daily) which I think I recounted at some point earlier in this thread. It was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced lol but I was far enough removed from my oxy addiction that I was able to responsibly use oxy (on day 9 at my wits end) to nullify the sub withdrawel and stay clean for nearly a year afterward.

That being said, it’s not something I want to experience again, even with a taper. I guess it’s teally going to come down to how bad the PAWS are - specifically depression and lethargy/apathy. If it gets bad I’m going to have to take a little sub.
 
That sounds like a reasonable plan. Glad to hear you're keeping all options open but doing what you feel like it most appropriate for your own needs. That's really important (finding ways to meet our need in recovery I mean), an entirely broader subject than just dealing with detoxing and whatnot.

I would try not to worry too much about PAWS. You can do a lot to mitigate it through healthy lifestyle changes and medication as appropriate for your needs/condition(s) if you have a co-occuring mental health condition. Healthy diet, exercise, learning to meditate or do something like yoga or martial arts, and taking time to do fun things (like going to the movies, spending time exploring nature, going to music events, going to the beach, baseball game, cooking a fancy meal for your family, whatever you enjoy for pure fun and enjoyment) will go a very VERY long way to preventing and mitigating the effects of PAWS.

PAWS only really become a problem when someone isn't being proactive or devoting enough energy to meeting their various needs (physiological needs in terms of health - so nutrition, exercise and sleep; and psychological and emotional needs, which are strongly effects by nutrition, exercise and sleep, but also self care stuff like having fun doing things you do for pure enjoyment and healthy recreational fun). Even if you can just focus your efforts right now on nutrition, establishing a healthy sleep cycle and getting exercise, it will do a hell of a lot of good for you down the road (and right now).

People often overlook the simple things in early recovery. The more resources we devote to getting/staying healthy in the simplest ways, the better off we'll be down the road. Think of it like investing in yourself and your recovery.
 
TPD as always thank you for the support and wisdom. I’m still fighting the good fight - haven’t taken sub today but took a little Kratom (half teaspoon of 2 diff strains). Doing my best to go without sub today if at all possible. I do feel flashes of anxiousness and depression but they also do subside. I’m almost done with day 7 clean.. day 8 begins midnight NYC time.

Does anyone have any info on NMDA antagonists and whether they aid PAWS and the healing / ability of the brain to return to a baseline level of opioid receptors? I read about it a little this morning - which then led me to get some K. I did a few bumps this morning which of course made me feel wonderful / gave me some spiritual insight and drive to continue staying clean. But i’m more interested in the positive physical changes it could make to my brain as far as PAWS and being a normal happy person.

Edit: look at this study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5105239/

A bump of k every morning for the next 3 weeks? Lol
 
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Midway through day 8.. still doing well. Haven’t taken sub since the 4mg at the beginning of day 7 so I’m roughly 40 hours since last sub dose (I realize this means there is still ~2mg in my system). Yesterday and today I took a couple teaspoons of Kratom and small dose Xanax. I also repeated (though much smaller dose - yesterday was my first time in awhile lol) ketamine dose this morning - this time just a bump. Not to get high but hopefully to aid in the normalization of my opioid receptors / minimization of PAWS. Forging onward.
 
Day 9 officially started :) still no sub either since the start of day 7. So 48 hrs no sub (with minor sporadic Kratom use). Interested to see how I feel tomorrow. The lethargy is getting to me... I may take a mg of sub just to get things done. Hmmmn.. we’ll see.

Edit: if anyone has comments / insight on any of my 3 successive posts please share!
 
Another quick update.. today was day 3 no sub (and day 9 no oxy). I’d say around the 65 hour mark I started to feel RLS and other light withdrawal symptoms so I took 1mg of sub.

I found this surprising because I thought after 9 days I’d be in the clear regarding physical symptoms. I suppose I’ve had a heavy habit for the past couple years though, and a habit of varying degrees for 8 years. The 1mg did the trick though - def won’t be taking more than 1mg moving forward. I guess 9 days isn’t that far removed in the grand scheme of things.

Day 10 begins midnight NYC time. Will continue to do my best. Also continued with the daily bump of k for its NMDA antagonist properties. Wonder if it’s making a difference. I already know the hardest part is going to be overcoming the lethargy and depression.
 
I know I’m essentially just talking to myself at this point ;) but Day 10 officially started one hour ago. Feeling good about that. Also, had friends over earlier and didn’t feel depressed or lethargic (but also took the 1mg sub around 5pm). But yea, on day 10 off oxy.

Another question (and if anyone has any insight regarding anything in my previous few successive posts please share). Does the fact that I took 65 hours between sub doses (4mg midnight of day 7 followed by 1mg taken the following 5pm of day 9) have any effect on how quickly I will become dependent?

If I continue to space these mg doses as long as possible and only take 1mg (or less) does it allow a lengthening of time before dependency? I am currently going by 2 weeks before dependency. Does my method push me closer to the 4 week end of the spectrum? Or is it rather 2 weeks of doses (14 doses), despite whether I take every other or every third day? I.e. Once 14 doses are consumed (2 weeks worth) even if it takes you a month to do it, dependency begins by the 15th dose (I realize this isn’t hard and fast - I just have immense respect for the power of bupe) due to the drugs exceptionally long half life.

Thanks again, and wish me luck with continuing to make the correct decisions for the betterment of my life.
 
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