Well had hearing today. Gonna vent about the system some more.
It's a fucking DISABILITY HEARING. It lasts like an hour (average is 2-10 minutes at this place).
90% of questions are about how I came up positive for cannabis but negative for other medications.
Note that this is on a 10 year old drug test.
That the doctor at the time told me that it must be wrong & to ignore it.
Apparently he still put it in the records & has since retired. He did cut off my medications.
But he was retiring & I was going to a new GP so we never bothered to do a re-test.
Who would of thought 10 years later that bites me in the ass, as it affected nothing at the time.
Hell Pain Management saw it, took me right in started me right up didn't give a fuck.
So after my recent "suicidide attempt" I also came up positive for cannabis.
Won't happen again as after the hospital worked me over lungs are shot & so is my heart.
Have an appointment with thoracic & cardiologist as damage is so bad.
Note that I had 0 problems in either regard before the hospital got to me.
So he asks me if I used since that 10 years ago & I say I don't recall as well I didn't.
I forgot that I smoked that night as well I popped so much shit I don't recall a damn thing.
So long story short we spend 45 minutes discussing whether I've smoked pot more than twice.
The 2nd time I was so fucked up on everything trying to make life & the pain end that I didn't remember.
"Honestly your honor as you can see by the medications I overdosed on that I really don't recall."
"Well I recall waking up in the hospital, but beyond that nothing else."
"As such I apologize that I can't give you a better answer but it's very possible I consumed cannabis that night,"
"However, as I have no recollection of said night I can't confirm that.
though the test results seem to indicate that."
"Could you be more specific?" says the judge.
"Considering the test results I would say that I likely did consume cannabis that night,
but I honestly can't recall."
"Without the actual recollection I hesitate to confirm or deny.
"But based on the evidence I will say yes your Honor."
"I did consume cannabis along with all the other substances I consumed.
"But I must state that I don't recall doing so."
"Is that to your satisfaction? As I honestly do not recall well enough to give you specifics."
"Yes that is a good enough answer for the court as you seem to be doing your best to answer honesty."
so says the Judge.
It was laughable. He didn't seem to care either way, seemed like he just was killing time.
As he didn't wanna deal with the next guy & I was clean cut & polite.
My lawyer basically said that the judge was known for fucking around like that about stupid shit.
And that the vocational expert saying I had a 0% chance of getting a job.
Or ever being able to do one should be what matters.
So just hoping everyone was telling the truth, as the whole thing has been so many lies & such a joke.
So that's my rant, the whole medical/disability/psych/system it's all one laughable joke.
Someone that's actually disabled with tons of documented physical & mental issues gets hassled.
About a drug test that wasn't accurate from 10 years ago.
So ridiculous, oh well least I think I might still win, I have to.
Or I'm fucked for life as I'm truly incapable of working, my probs legit sadly enough.
Really don't wanna go back to the hustling thing & gonna be busy enough trying to get my PM back.
As GP won't do it after the whole "suicide attempt" thing.
Taught me my lesson about trying to get help quicker, don't just wait & suffer.
Apparently you just gotta spend years & years waiting on specialists & rotting in the meantime.
Oh well, least specialists are coming up & I might win this & have a chance at life.
As I don't mind calling it quits if it's my choice.
But I don't wanna be forced to off my self by circumstance.
Trolled by a Administrative Law Judge, who would have thought...