Hey guys. Just wondering about my experience . So long story short,I ve been prescribed antidepressants for depression that triggered the anxiety and panic attacks..Im not very social,frankly im quite a sociopath..people often dont get me and I seem moody,even my friends are turning on me..I can see by the looks that they see my awkwardness and make them feel awkward...my depression is about loneliness and feeling of losing at life in general,sure people can sense it,Ive been told im very strange guy to the face...so im not socialising very often..too much worry makes you speak sort of strange.
Shit,forgot about my topic,got carried away,so yeah Ive started them SSRIs and they made me feel more like a person,more hyped I guess,more sure about my self,sometimes too much confidence(got my friend beat up,cuz of shit i said and made a lot of stupid things like shoplifting)..sometimes with very good effect,Im sort of person that likes to talk,but the topics I chose are not very much to talk about,thats what Ive always thought about my self,well honestly also Im slow,kinda slow thinking person . SSRI. I just forgot about it and expressed my self as I wanted:good example is when Im high ,like really high I just shut up,because of my paranoia,depressed thoughts and fear of not making sense,but on these pills I just went all positive and did some really good chatting with people,even made them laugh ,made my self interesting person...I dont know how,but this is really how I felt,it made me genuinely interesting and active person. My thoughts on it..is it me? Like real me? Or is it that this drug can make you think better,maybe even faster,all things that make you a good thinker,and think of good things to say? Also made one girl to fall in love to me,I didnt care about her,it was all her,and she was very into me,didnt happen earlier in life..never..this is frist time and Im on damn pills! Then for several reasons I quit my SSRIs they weren't very effective anyway as I slipped in my depression,again but hey its part of me..for that short period of my experience with Zoloft Ive actually felt some people interest in me,yeah thats important for me,because of loneliness and awkwardness in this experiment you call life.
So could be like that? One part of me is saying to go back to them pills (wishing that this will change me for better,as some pushing force inside my brain to get thingz going all good) and another part is telling to work on my self,as theres no quick fixes and just work it out without any help(if pills have tendency to just mess the order in life)
Shit,forgot about my topic,got carried away,so yeah Ive started them SSRIs and they made me feel more like a person,more hyped I guess,more sure about my self,sometimes too much confidence(got my friend beat up,cuz of shit i said and made a lot of stupid things like shoplifting)..sometimes with very good effect,Im sort of person that likes to talk,but the topics I chose are not very much to talk about,thats what Ive always thought about my self,well honestly also Im slow,kinda slow thinking person . SSRI. I just forgot about it and expressed my self as I wanted:good example is when Im high ,like really high I just shut up,because of my paranoia,depressed thoughts and fear of not making sense,but on these pills I just went all positive and did some really good chatting with people,even made them laugh ,made my self interesting person...I dont know how,but this is really how I felt,it made me genuinely interesting and active person. My thoughts on it..is it me? Like real me? Or is it that this drug can make you think better,maybe even faster,all things that make you a good thinker,and think of good things to say? Also made one girl to fall in love to me,I didnt care about her,it was all her,and she was very into me,didnt happen earlier in life..never..this is frist time and Im on damn pills! Then for several reasons I quit my SSRIs they weren't very effective anyway as I slipped in my depression,again but hey its part of me..for that short period of my experience with Zoloft Ive actually felt some people interest in me,yeah thats important for me,because of loneliness and awkwardness in this experiment you call life.
So could be like that? One part of me is saying to go back to them pills (wishing that this will change me for better,as some pushing force inside my brain to get thingz going all good) and another part is telling to work on my self,as theres no quick fixes and just work it out without any help(if pills have tendency to just mess the order in life)