Phactor I been going to NA meetings for years now becuz I am forced to go for probation. I got a very good understanding of it, I just really disagree with it. My post was generalized but in it i was mainly talkin about the people who really conform strictly to the steps and not the average people who are decent folks at the meeting. I have experienced a whole lot of discrimination and bullshit from people for bein on methadone, i have seen so many people with terrible injuries and chronic pain conditions or who needed surgeries, etc, been told that they cannot take any pain medication or they will become a miserable relapsed addict in "jails institutions and death", i have heard of sponsors who will drop their sponsee becuz the sponsee took a prescribed antidepressant and refused to sponsor them again until they went off their meds, etc.
And im sure that aint the norm but in my experience, honestly i have seen waaaay more of this restricting limiting type of shit than accepting "ill mind my own bizness, you take any pills you need to if you really need to" type attitudes. I been to meetings all over the place, lots of different ones, oldtimers and young kids and in between, in rehab and outside of it, AA and NA...so it aint a case of just not goin to the right meeting, at least i dont think so. i understand the shit you saying and from you bein here for years like i have i know you are a smart guy and not a brainwash type of dude to blindly follow somethin like that. I see that your ideas about the shit are moderate and thoghtful and not just some do anything they tell you type attitude. so i appreciate ur response.
The one thing that I would like to warn you tho is just from my personal experience. I have met sooooooo many people who start the program and get clean for a little while, 2 weeks, a month, 3 months, and they just get so into it , talkin about how the program finally saved their life, now they finally gonna be OK, the program is so amazing, they put their all into it becuz its the truth and its the way, etc. they get really into it, so happy becuz they found the solution, all about it.And i have had a lot of those people tell ME that i will be the one using and relapsing cuz I didnt do the steps and they are "the only way", etc. But in that time, i seen every last one of them relapse and end up addicted again or goin on the "relapse/back to the meettings/relapse/back to the meetings' cycle while I been still clean. the reason why is they put too much into the program, too much weight into it, just another thing that was gonna save them, and not enough emphasis on doing the shit for themself truly from inside. i think thats somethin that a lot of people in the program dont do, and thats why theres so much relapsing and the program got such a high failure rate, becuz they devote so much time and energy to the program and meetings, etc, these outside things that just fill up their time and life so they aint got no time to use, and dont focus on really doing the work inside themself and recognizing that their power not to use comes from within and not the program or a higher power but them, and that they are the one in charge, that they do have the power and they can use it.
I seen it a lot, At first it seems so good, so simple, the idea that as long as you just do the shit they tell you to do you can be clean, it seems so freeing and amazing....But just dont let that shit blow you away too much. reality will hit soon and once it does , it gets harder and harder to get clean if you are relying too much on the program to get you thru. you need to develop the shit inside of yourself to make it happen as a permanent thing, and i aint talkin about the steps i mean the basic principles of this shit, self control, discipline, faith in yourself and your future, patience, and the BURNING DESIRE to have a good life and not be a drug addict no more. you gotta really want that shit and take action to do it like you said, which aint got nothing to do with NA, it just is kind of a support for that idea. But the real shit gotta be inside you, and it will always be there whether yuo do a meeting or not, and thats how you ll really stay clean and keep your shit together. you can do both of those things togehter, this internal shit and the NA program, that works fine but i think that if you just put all your faith and effort into NA and ignore your own power in it its really easy to end up like those chronic relapsers. They talk a good game but there aint no substance to the shit, and thats exactly wat NA is without a strong will and faith in yourself.
So keep doin your meetings, I aint tryna discourage you or w/ever. Im just sayin to be careful and make sure not to become one of the peopel who are just newly gettin started in the program and they get so excited and happy and they on cloud 9 on some shit like "ill never use again , yay NA!" and then eventually it cracks. when it does, just have that internal shit ready so that you got somethin INSIDE you too, not just the outside support of the program, u feel me? Good luck with it yo.
And im sure that aint the norm but in my experience, honestly i have seen waaaay more of this restricting limiting type of shit than accepting "ill mind my own bizness, you take any pills you need to if you really need to" type attitudes. I been to meetings all over the place, lots of different ones, oldtimers and young kids and in between, in rehab and outside of it, AA and NA...so it aint a case of just not goin to the right meeting, at least i dont think so. i understand the shit you saying and from you bein here for years like i have i know you are a smart guy and not a brainwash type of dude to blindly follow somethin like that. I see that your ideas about the shit are moderate and thoghtful and not just some do anything they tell you type attitude. so i appreciate ur response.
The one thing that I would like to warn you tho is just from my personal experience. I have met sooooooo many people who start the program and get clean for a little while, 2 weeks, a month, 3 months, and they just get so into it , talkin about how the program finally saved their life, now they finally gonna be OK, the program is so amazing, they put their all into it becuz its the truth and its the way, etc. they get really into it, so happy becuz they found the solution, all about it.And i have had a lot of those people tell ME that i will be the one using and relapsing cuz I didnt do the steps and they are "the only way", etc. But in that time, i seen every last one of them relapse and end up addicted again or goin on the "relapse/back to the meettings/relapse/back to the meetings' cycle while I been still clean. the reason why is they put too much into the program, too much weight into it, just another thing that was gonna save them, and not enough emphasis on doing the shit for themself truly from inside. i think thats somethin that a lot of people in the program dont do, and thats why theres so much relapsing and the program got such a high failure rate, becuz they devote so much time and energy to the program and meetings, etc, these outside things that just fill up their time and life so they aint got no time to use, and dont focus on really doing the work inside themself and recognizing that their power not to use comes from within and not the program or a higher power but them, and that they are the one in charge, that they do have the power and they can use it.
I seen it a lot, At first it seems so good, so simple, the idea that as long as you just do the shit they tell you to do you can be clean, it seems so freeing and amazing....But just dont let that shit blow you away too much. reality will hit soon and once it does , it gets harder and harder to get clean if you are relying too much on the program to get you thru. you need to develop the shit inside of yourself to make it happen as a permanent thing, and i aint talkin about the steps i mean the basic principles of this shit, self control, discipline, faith in yourself and your future, patience, and the BURNING DESIRE to have a good life and not be a drug addict no more. you gotta really want that shit and take action to do it like you said, which aint got nothing to do with NA, it just is kind of a support for that idea. But the real shit gotta be inside you, and it will always be there whether yuo do a meeting or not, and thats how you ll really stay clean and keep your shit together. you can do both of those things togehter, this internal shit and the NA program, that works fine but i think that if you just put all your faith and effort into NA and ignore your own power in it its really easy to end up like those chronic relapsers. They talk a good game but there aint no substance to the shit, and thats exactly wat NA is without a strong will and faith in yourself.
So keep doin your meetings, I aint tryna discourage you or w/ever. Im just sayin to be careful and make sure not to become one of the peopel who are just newly gettin started in the program and they get so excited and happy and they on cloud 9 on some shit like "ill never use again , yay NA!" and then eventually it cracks. when it does, just have that internal shit ready so that you got somethin INSIDE you too, not just the outside support of the program, u feel me? Good luck with it yo.
