SMH at some of the ppl who disagrees with this. i agree with dextermeth when he said lets face it . some people just need a shitload of tranquilizers to be tranquil.
Some people WILL NEVER RECOVER.
Not for a lack of trying.
Not for a lack of help, of love, of support.
Not for a lack of wantin,,,
Its the people that i seen, that just fall, again and again and again. The people that end up OD'ing and dying.
I think of my friend steve, he was someone like that. he just never stopped. whenever we got high, it was like a contest of who could die quicker swear to god. He tried to get clean so many times, he tried and tried. And he just kept making the same mistakes and just never learned. He wasnt stupid. he was a true sweetheart. He was so many things that you wouldnt think of when you think "junkie."
I dont want to make this about him im just using him as a example becuz he is one of the people who woulda been able to actually live a real life with a program like this.
He got arrested like 7 times in the first 6 mos i knew him. He just kept DOING the same shit OVER AND OVER and it was like he had lost all thought and ability to make decisiions no more and just gave up let go and let the tide of his addiction take him wherever it wanted to. He was homeless in camden , callin me up talkin bout how great it was cuz nobody to fuck with him no more and he can just get high as much as he want. he got locked up in 3 different times, in passaic county for lik e9 mos, in pa out somewhere, in morris county, he would drive so fucked up that he nodded out at red lights an crashed his car right into the ass of another one in front of him...He just was so sloppy, reckless, careless, and totally un self aware that he was destroying himself. He would do anything to get high, always some kind of scheme and scam and even when he was on house arrest locked up by his moms who finaly had enough and wouldnt let him leave the house, and he would still find a way , he would rob her and use the money to pay off somebody to come to the crib when she was aseep at night and deliver him shit....I would go on, but i think its enough to say that he was just lost. totally and completely gone. And he died this summer, RIP. His mother even said to me, it was about time. we always knew thats how he would go . and it just made me so sad to think his own mother had gave up on him.
Peopole like that, would do great on this maintenance program. Stop making it this constant struggle and hustle and lifestyle. u put that siht in front of them and then the free to live their life normal.....
The whole point is that things SHOULD be a certain way....but sometimes they AINT. And sometimes they never ever will be. Some things will never change. And sometimes, to be real with ourselves we gotta admit that fact.
To truly believe in harm reduction, you got to accept the REALITY of the way shit is, and be willing to work WITH That reality, instead of some kind of flawed, doomed to fail plan of working towards somethin that aint even based in the truth of how shit is..
And maybe shit can change, and theres lots of shit devotd to helping that happen. We got rehabs and programs and committees and all type of shit that is dedicated towards helpin eliminate drug addictions and all that shit. But thats some future shit. And i aint sayin to give that up and say fuck it, but just that we need something for NOW. Becuz in the meantime, until we got better treatment for people, until we got more outreach towards ppl who is forgotten by society and left behind, all those users and junkies is left in the dust and suffering. They CANT wait til shit gets better, til its how it "should" be. They aint got the time. They are OD'ing and losing fingers and arms and gettin locked up and dying while people sit around talking about hypothetical shit on how we could and should make it better.
This heroin maintenance program is based in the sad reality, but its one we need to face. Some people aint gonna recover. some people is gonna shoot dope til they fuckin die. Some people dont know how to live no more, and even with the most devoted training and rehab and care and support will still go back out on to the street and shoot dope into their arms. Its just how life is. Some people cant be cured. but they CAN be helped. And we should all want nothin more than to do that. I am idealistic. but i am also realistic. I believe that everybody can be helped, that you can save people who seems too far gone to the rest of the world. And i will never stop workin towards that, but I also recognize how important it is to work with people in the ways that can help them, not the ways that "should" help them but wont work for watever reason.
I aint sayin we should take ppl who shoot dope for a year and have a lil problem and went to detox once and got back on dope and give them medical IV heroin all day. I aint sayin this should be some type of free for all. But for the long time balls to the wall never gonna quit, "hope i die with this next shot cuz i rather be dead than keep doing this but i just cant stop", this program could be a god send.
Seriously, there is awlays gonna be these people, the ones who is gonna OD and end up dead from their use, the ones who just cant seem to shake it. The "hopeless" ones. This program gives them a alternative to jails and death--And not only that but its the CHAOS of the lifestyle that keeps you down when you in it. when you remove that constant chaos, struggle, hustle, fear, and all that, it give you the time to actually deal with other parts of your life. Once you got the main problem, keepin frmo gettin sick, outta the way, then you free to pursue the real shit. but the problem with bein on a dope run is that you never get there cuz its a constant fight to stay well and stay from gettin locked up and all that.
So you give ppl this and eliminate all that crazyness and they gonna slowly start to recover, its a natural progression...And not only that, but alot of us can never seem to quit becuz its liike, just this one time...jus so i can get high real good one more time. just one last one, but it never works, the dope is bunk,. you couldnt afford enough to get real wasted and you keep chasing.
I know tho , that times that i copped a brick of straight fire to myself, and just could shoot as much fucking dope as i wanted to whenever i wanted, i would wake up the next day and be like DAM......I dont even WANT to shoot up right now! And i would wait a few hours after gettin up , wait until i was actually sick again to get high...And that availibility, the access to good dope all the time, kind of takes away that chase....cuz its there, you CAN have it, and it makes it easier to focus on other shit. You CAN get that "last" good high. and just like anything good, too much of it, you get sick of it. Iunno bout yal, but whenever got access to somethin so great, all the time, and its always available, its right there, its like after a month of a all you can shoot dope buffet, it actually starts to loose its enjoyment.
Even all us ppl who been "hardcore" junkies, the ones who would absolutely destroy a brick in less than a day and a half, we know how it loses its enjoymebt abd yo start to not even want to do it no more after a certain point. it aint even like you get high no more its just somethin you do to stay well and not be sick. you get mad disilusioned with it and just feel like it aint worth ur time no more and iunno, it just aint so great. i feel like if alot of us had a program like this it would actually encourae us to quit. It gives you the opportunity to stabilize ur life and eventaully, u do feel ready. and when you ready, they all right there for you to give you the treatment and help you need to learn to quit and change ur life.
I aint gonna keep going but damn it makes me sad of how many ppl here think this is some kind of terrible thing.Oh well....
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
