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Greatest drug induced quotes....Trippin/rollin/stoned/doped/dusted LOL's go here!

I'm glad you know that quote hahaha <3
Tripping at extreme levels of 16mg 2C-P in the nose;
Friend A throws a Steelers blanket over friend B
Friend B "GET THAT STEEL CURTAIN OFF ME!"
I didn't get it at the time.. But it was really, really funny nevertheless.
We were watching Sealab 2021, funniest thing I've ever seen tripping, if anyone knows "Get away from me kitty" and "I warned him" I couldn't breath..
 
I like to put them out of context:

on mescaline:

"C'mon, I will steal you a pizza if you just give me one backrub."

on mushrooms:

"Well why aren't you naked?"

"Ok, time-out, need a quick smoke break before i can resume this trip."
 
Friend sitting in my driveway at 1 am.
"Dude if im tripin how come i can hear those ants?"
 
This is'nt quite a qote but I was on LSD, molly. and read this by T.S Eliot.
Hysteria
"As she laughed I was aware of becoming involved in her laughter and being part of it, until her teeth were only accidental stars with a talent for squad-drill. I was drawn in by short gasps, inhaled at each momentary recovery, lost finally in the dark caverns of her throat, bruised by the ripple of unseen muscles. An elderly waiter with trembling hands was hurriedly spreading a pink and white checked cloth over the rusty green iron table, saying: "If the lady and gentleman wish to take their tea in the garden, if the lady and gentleman wish to take their tea in the garden..." I decided that if the shaking of her breasts could be stopped, some of the fragments of the afternoon might be collected, and I concentrated my attention with careful subtlety to this end. "
Blew my mind springs for a few hours.
 
"I sort of feel like I'm on heroin when I'm with you."

"Me too, but we're both on heroin right now."

"Oh... Well, you know what I mean."
 
My friends and I tend to blend words often (I'm sure many of you guys do that too 8) )
I just remember this one really good one on a really good night....

"Banopinut" The combination of a Banana, Pineapple, and Coconut....

Sounds delicious doesn't it?? ;P

YES,

all time favourite fruits. Best drink in the world - crushed ice, 1 banana, a cup or more of fresh pineapple, and about 1/3 cup coconut milk all blended together... Such a great drink, with or without rum. I never understood why pina coladas don't include banana, it's so much better with banana!

Favourite quote from dust-off girl on intervention "I'm walking on sunshine. I can conquer the world".
 
Me and 2 friends are blazing in my living room and one of them drops ash on the carpet. So stupidly i said brush it under the couch so my buddy says "That'll smear it everywhere" then I said 'What are you, some kind of fucking rug doctor?"

lol it was funnier at the time and its too bad i cant remember anytihng else from that sesh cuz i remember it being hilarious

good thread btw

Seriously the funniest quote on here. Bar none. Rug doctor. Genius.
 
I had a buddy who tripped on ~an 8th of shrooms and was convinced he had just become a millionaire. For over an hour he was just saying shit like

"A MILLION DOLLARS!!"

"I never have to go to work again, I can just sit here and do nothing and wake up in a GTR"

"To sell this" (I think he was formulating a business plan to spread shrooms and profit

"Fuck justin bieber I own that bitch!"

Also another memorable one was when my friend was suuuuper coked out and we started talking about another friend of ours who isn't the brightest. My friend, with the most super serious coke face, goes

"If everyone were like him, the government could easily control us"

Fast forward a few months, I'm on acid with a different friend, and I remember that quote and bring it up to my friend for the lulz, but I completely butchered it and was just like

"If the government was like him, they could easily be controlled...oh wait fuck"
 
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one summer night, i had to call an ambulance to get my friend who was seizing up / shaking / foaming at the mouth due to 4g shrooms (i took the exact same batch and I was fine).

This was his first shroom trip -- and I took 4g on my first trip too, and experienced ego death etc. but I look back on it as one of the most important moments of my life. That was the point where I took a good hard look at myself, stopped being unhappy with myself, and decided to do something with my life.

So I was hungry and wanted to get some Tim Horton's donuts while tripping (only a 5 minute walk from where I live + not much food in the fridge) -- except he couldn't walk in a straight line. I told him let's sit down on the grass behind where I live. I went to the washroom after 1 hour and then when I came back, I saw him starting to seize uo so I had to call 911. I grabbed his hand and everything, squeezed it, called his name repeatedly, etc. but nothing worked so I had to make the call. I had to keep my knee on his side in case he vomited before the paramedics came.

When they arrived, I pulled his wallet + ID out of his pocket and asked the paramedics to leave a note for him to call me in the morning so I could pick him up. They said they deal with these calls like once a month, and it's no big deal, my friend will be OK in the morning.

So the next day, he ended up calling my other buddy (who is totally anti-drug... and since this day we stopped being friends) to pick him up. The next day I threw a house party and when I saw him, he said 'When you grabbed my hand last night, I thought you were my spiritual guardian who was gonna guide and save me from the shroom trip"

LOL
 
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Somewhat recently I had a pretty intense experience on nitrous and for whatever reason when I came out of it I declared loudly, "I just tasted the Universe!", I don't know why I said that really, but a lot of the time when I come back from nitrous I say random things that don't make sense. Any way, the people I was with seemed to find this particular declaration quite funny.
 
at a rave on acid

me "i'm looking for a friend"
random "how is he dressed?"
me "orange,... i'm looking for a large walking orange" ;)
 
My boy tripping tits walked to the park with two other friends (He decided to bring a samurai sword?)
This family was getting out of the car my friend stops, looks directly into their soul and asks "Is there a problem?"
I think they were carrying a lot of shit inside and he was just trying to help, sweating balls, dinner plate pupils strapped with a fucking sword hahahaha.
When I finally get there (I had been up 2 days from crystal, taken a buncha xanax, then proceeded over and immediately dropped 4. I needed cigs so me and my sword friend go to the store, I INSTANTLY lose my keys and debit card within 20 seconds of being in the store, we buy our shit n they close the store (11pm?) So my friend walks home, gets my other 2 friends who are also tripping balls.. They finally get back and I immediately hear laughing because I'm 100% convinced I can start my truck by jamming a sawzall into the ignition and turning it with a screw driver.. Needless to say we walked home. I apparently lit 8 cigarettes and handed one to everyone n smoked 2, then I do recall feeling the need, a HUGE need (this was after I dropped 5 more hits) to dump out my cigs, then make it rain with them. Friend laying down in the garage 'Someone pass me a cigarette!" *Gets handed an open beer* "Oh shit!"' *Chugs, so happy about it*
 
Me right after first DMT trip to my psychonaut buddy: "Wait..brah.. you do that on the regular? What? And you're just sitting here?...like this is normal?"

Buddy to me during DMT trip: "You're supposed to be dead"

Me during shroom trip: (within an unstoppable rant that spawned from watching the movie Gravity) "If these people on the commercials, ya know, the 'give us $1 to save an African child, if they already have the equipment and skills to do so, then why are they asking for money? Is money more important than life? Will they sit and watch a baby die from medical reasons because no one will give them a dollar? How come these govts spend billions on military to slaughter humans but can't help those who are dying..... I'm gonna come up with a plan to overthrow the government."

Me eating after potent weed session: "hahaha we're just animals eating other dead animals with tools at a (quote fingers) table, to appear less like animals. Only thing that matters in life is eating and drinking water. All this other shit is stupid"

Me after watching porn on DMT: "Wha.. H-How did she know... Is she real? How did she know that I was gonna... she knew that I was gonna do DMT at this exact moment in my life right here with her. Does she..like the porn star irl..know that this happens?"
 
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-do you ever feel good when you're not on PCP?
-yeah
-what does make you feel good?
-PCP!
Damn that's an oldie, but nevertheless I laughed the first time I saw it. He keeps going to load more, then forgets. Over n over again, lol.
 
Mushrooms:

Dude itd take more than one chinchilla to make a coat

Like how many?

I dunno like two if you stretch em out

Mushrooms

Lets steal a lawnmower and cut half pf somebodies grass and leave a sign on the mower that says "shit happens"
 
Mushrooms at a small gettogether

Hey ryan remeber that time you sucked a dick

Oh yeah. For all that cocaine

Mushrooms with my friend at a sober friends house

Sober is playing rayman and were quietly giggling. And he turns to us and says "what the hell is sp goddamn funny?

Which killed us we were laughing so hard
 
Weed

Waiting in line behind a ten year old kod and his mom at 711. My friend john looks at me then at the kid and back at me. While he motions at the rotating hotdog thing thays packed with burritos and says "what the fuck are these? Go go kachangas?"

You ever exp somethijg so funny you cant laugh? Yeah that happened. I could feel the laughter wanting out so i calmly hand john my slurpee and some money and walk out. As soon as i step outside im laughing so hard i slapped the hood of the wrong car while i was nent over laughing.

He walked out and had no idea what he said
 
That same john once stpped driving at one of those yellow stop ahead signs with the little red stopsign
 
Last night's stoner discussion regarding LSD: "That would be so sick; high as fuck eatin' peaches and shit."
 
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