Hello there bluelight . Feel free to move this if it doesnt belong
I know there are lots of threads on xanax dependency but my situation is unique as is everyones and I had a specific question as well .
So . A couple years back I had a messy love affair with cocaine . She is as cold hearted as she is beautiful . Anyway after about 6 months of everyday all day irresponsibility I feel I permanently dicked my dopamine system . Prohibitive anxiety in all aspects of life, depression and this crippling "reverse aggression." Which is hard to describe but I could not stand up for myself anymore things like that . All of it was new .
Now I have found a solution in xanax . .5mg per day allows me to not be afraid to say whats in my mind as I was before, not scared to be me anymore, anxiety gone etc . Allows me to function to my full potential .
However knowing all I do I am very hesitant to continue down this road . I know all about what will happen when I discontinue and the sometimes reported years of gray existence afterwards would be more than I could handle . (Square 1)
However something was mentioned in a thread, I cannot remember the name of it for the life of me but a pharm that "resets" the downregulation of gaba receptors with im assuming causes the permanent rewiring . Rewires it for the better if you will . Repairs the neurological changes long term xanax use brings.
Now my question is, does anyone recall what that is and any personal experiences with it ?
I would also love any opinions, thoughts , objective viewpoints etc. regarding my situation and what you would do in my situation .
It got so bad and I really am half the person I really am without the xan . I am equally scared of going back to that timid existence as I am of the permanent changes .
Note: these problems were certain to be neurological in nature as I have had many personal issues beforehand that I have since conquered . I am a very social outgoing person that knows how to deal with situational anxiety etc. but no matter what these beasts reared their ugly heads over nothing at all .
Thank you everyone
I know there are lots of threads on xanax dependency but my situation is unique as is everyones and I had a specific question as well .
So . A couple years back I had a messy love affair with cocaine . She is as cold hearted as she is beautiful . Anyway after about 6 months of everyday all day irresponsibility I feel I permanently dicked my dopamine system . Prohibitive anxiety in all aspects of life, depression and this crippling "reverse aggression." Which is hard to describe but I could not stand up for myself anymore things like that . All of it was new .
Now I have found a solution in xanax . .5mg per day allows me to not be afraid to say whats in my mind as I was before, not scared to be me anymore, anxiety gone etc . Allows me to function to my full potential .
However knowing all I do I am very hesitant to continue down this road . I know all about what will happen when I discontinue and the sometimes reported years of gray existence afterwards would be more than I could handle . (Square 1)
However something was mentioned in a thread, I cannot remember the name of it for the life of me but a pharm that "resets" the downregulation of gaba receptors with im assuming causes the permanent rewiring . Rewires it for the better if you will . Repairs the neurological changes long term xanax use brings.
Now my question is, does anyone recall what that is and any personal experiences with it ?
I would also love any opinions, thoughts , objective viewpoints etc. regarding my situation and what you would do in my situation .
It got so bad and I really am half the person I really am without the xan . I am equally scared of going back to that timid existence as I am of the permanent changes .
Note: these problems were certain to be neurological in nature as I have had many personal issues beforehand that I have since conquered . I am a very social outgoing person that knows how to deal with situational anxiety etc. but no matter what these beasts reared their ugly heads over nothing at all .
Thank you everyone