When will this end...

[Ganj]

Its now been a week since this happened http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads...mg-Experianced-A-Psychedelic-in-its-own-right

I smoked a bong of crystals and experienced serious de-personalization, like nothing was real, like reality was simply some frail concept that could snap at any moment and was then stupid enough to take a dose of 5-meo-dalt and lsd (It was only 150ug... barely anything...) the next day. I have done this kind of idiocy multiple times before, tripping for 48+ hours straight and always sobered up the next day. But since that trip I have seriously not felt normal. Im not asking for sympathy, and I hate to waste knowledgeable BL's time responding to yet another fools post, but it really does feel like this will never end.

My veteran tripper friend described it as what I'm feeling is a heightened sense of reality, which as accurate as it sounds I hate it. Real life feels foreign and obscure. Mentally I don't feel different, but my perception of reality feels damaged. The thought that this could be permanent terrifies me. I look at how I felt before this event and I just feel absolutely miles from that sober state of mind and miss it like hell.

I really am at the weakest and most desperate point I have ever been in. I have been getting exercise, eating as healthily as I can and taking lots of vitamin C and am trying my best to get into a regular sleep pattern. Since this happened I have avoided weed and uppers like poison and stopped smoking as it makes it worse but have unfortunately found comfort in benzo's and have been drinking frankly to escape my altered consciousness as much as it kills me to admit that.

I do not expect to go back to normal, but if this does not subside down to a manageable level I have no idea what I will do.

My question is it it worth going to a doctor? I don't really feel manic or anything, but definitely fried in the head and slightly odd thought patterns.

It feels like I'm not really here, and tends to get worse throughout the day as I get tired. I also have fairly bad anxiety which makes this whole thing a nightmare. Is there anything else I can do at least slightly come back from this?

Id wish this on no-one. I pray I will start to feel slightly better over a long period of time but I cant even tell if its getting better or worse, I dont understand how dosages seriously lower than I have taken before have done so much damage...

 

[sekio]

The more you worry about the kind of state you're in, the worse you'll feel.

It can take quite a while for people to re-integrate intense psychedelic experiences in their life. For some they bounce back after a few days, for others it takes months.

You say you stopped smoking and taking stims too? That's a good thing but depending on the frequency of your drug use before you stopped smoking, taking stimulants etc, you may also be experiencing stuff like nicotine withdrawal or psychological dependence on other drugs. That can definitely contribute to feeling weird.

The honest truth is there is no miracle treatment for psychedelic shell shock. Pushing it out of the way with benzos and alcohol won't make it go away. Most "damage" like the type you're talking about is psychological.

My theory is that a bad psychedelic trip can cause cortisol levels (cortisol is a major stress horomone that is a fat soluble steroid) in your body to rise, and with high stress horomone levels it is easy to get even more stressed. Cortisol is also elevated by certain drugs, explaining why certain drugs make you worse off. It becomes a vicious cycle that can only be broken by avoiding getting more stressed and by letting your body undergo a slow, long relaxation.

The only thing dr's can do is give you band aids basically. SSRIs, anxiolytics, maybe benzos. None of those will help you in the long run. Just keep trying your best to be healthy and try to use drugs in moderation if you need stress relief. But a better idea is to find non drug ways to make yourself feel better.

I also advise you to stay as far as you can from things like benzos, opioids, and alcohol. Especially if you have anxiety problems and you're only 16. The last thing you need at your age is a crippling BZD addiction or alcoholism. It is so, so easy to have casual benzo use turn into something you just can't kick. Stick to cannabis instead.

My advice is to find some sort of activity that you can do that helps you relax and unwind. Get a bicycle and go for a ride maybe. Learn how to play chess. Start a journal. Reconnect with nature. Meditate. Start a garden. Do some vigorous exercise then have a hot bath. Keep doing it on a regular basis, too.

It also can't hurt to find a counsellor or youth worker you can talk to. Especially if you're young, I would guess there's lots of places that would give you free or low cost counselling. Sometimes talking to someone can really help you figure out how to deal with issues in your life.

This is just a wake up call that you need to stop partying so much. If you keep digging a pit for yourself then you might not be able to get out, y'know.

 

[Flickering]

I agreed completely up until the cannabis part. Definitely DON'T smoke weed, it is NOTORIOUS for exacerbating dissociative conditions and anxiety. I know full well the allure of altered states to help you escape shitty feelings but you need to do everything in your power to stop taking substances for a while. Your brain needs to go back to baseline for a while and every time you make things weird for yourself again, it's stopping the mind from repairing itself. The comedown and withdrawal symptoms makes depersonalisation much worse while it lasts. I am speaking from experience. Stimulate dopamine in healthier ways. Get plenty of rest, sleep to a regular schedule, exercise and eat well, those are the best things you can do for yourself at the moment.

Also from experience: this won't last forever. I had to put up with derealisation for six months following a series of shocking psychedelic experiences. Yes it was my on damn fault, but you shouldn't feel stupid asking for help or like you're wasting anyone's time. Plenty of people here know what you're going through and, don't take this the wrong way but, your post can serve as an example of others as what not to do. It's all in the interest of harm reduction, that's what this forum is for.

Like sekio said, this is actually psychological. The same principles apply to HPPD. Depersonalisation actually flares up the more you worry about it. The best thing you can do is learn to ignore it. Once you do that, it will stop. It won't happen overnight. But the mind changes with time a lot more than you think. As long as you stop directing your attention towards this awful feeling of unreality, eventually your brain will rewire itself and you'll be fine.

Take it easy, I remember well how absolutely shit that feeling was and I wish you all the best. You'll be okay.

 

[Dawglaw]

Read the LTC thread in the MDMA forum, lots of great advice and support there. You are not the first person to go through this. Many people (myself included) have been there and made it back 100%. It takes time and is scary as hell but you will be ok.

 

[Erikmen]

Hope you get over this soon.
Try not to think too much of your situation.
You can also take Omega 3 pills, natural, 1000 mg 2 x a day.
It is vitamin c for the brain.

 

[AA357]

My veteran tripper friend described it as what I'm feeling is a heightened sense of reality, which as accurate as it sounds I hate it.

Sorry but that dude needs a slap. Veteran tripper? More like acid casualty.

What you're experiencing is not a heightened sense of reality at all... it's a distorted sense of reality. You are psychologically a bit traumatized but you'll soon recover.
Not to sound like a dick but you just need to man up, carry on with your life and forget about this shitty experience. The longer you dwell on it, the more you will F yourself up psychologically. Good luck man.

 

[creamynebula]

My advice is to find some sort of activity that you can do that helps you relax and unwind. Get a bicycle and go for a ride maybe. Learn how to play chess. Start a journal. Reconnect with nature. Meditate. Start a garden. Do some vigorous exercise then have a hot bath. Keep doing it on a regular basis, too.

I second this excellent advice, thats the way to go, and with time you will integrate your experience, get past your trauma and get back to your regular neurochemistry/hormonal balance. Stop the alcohol and the benzos, I'm addicted to benzodiazepines and I ask you to please never consume them in subsequent days, its a fine line between harmless use and dependence, leave them. Exercise intenselly, eat, sleep, talk, you will get better soon enough.

 

[Ganj]

I agree that this entire thing is psychological, and it definitely gets worse the more you think about the whole thing.

sekio, my previous drug use was not frequent enough to cause dependency. I have never in my life taken drugs to escape reality or issues until now, yet still even while I'm using downers like this I am still in complete control of their use and can be around them withiout using them when I choose tver the last few days I have started meditation, and I will continue to do so daily as I feel that is probably one of the best things I can do for myself. This information has made me feel a lot better man thanks for taking the time to post the information. As Flickering has noted I am completely done with cannabis, smoking it for years has completely fried my head already.

I bought omega 3 today and will start taking it daily and poured the vodka down the sink.

AA357 honestly thats exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks a fucking tonne everyone.

I and a few others planned to take MDMA this weekend far before this entire ordeal. If the dose is kept low and I do it on enough sleep and continue the positive habits I have picked up since this started (Regular sleep pattern, much better diet, exercise and meditation etc...) will it have any substantial effect on my current issue If I instead take it in a week or two? I hate the idea of completely changing my lifestyle due to this incident but If it really is my long term perception of reality at stake then there's no question involved...

 

[cosmic._.ape]

i wouldn't take any drug (unless advised by a doctor; definitely not for fun) well after totally recovered... a few months after, at least, maybe never?... you are playing with your own life... what could it take you? a few months? a few years...?

 

[Doldrugs]

Stick to cannabis instead.

What the fuck?

No, you should not stick to cannabis. It's already caused you psychological issues multiple times before by your own admission. It's notorious for exacerbating psychological problems and difficult psychedelic states. And scientific consensus states that it is potentially very harmful to a brain as young as yours even in the absence of preexisting problems. I cannot believe this is the advice a moderator on a harm reduction forum would give a 16 year old kid in this situation.

Other than NOT DOING CANNABIS AT ALL I would recommend you cease all drug use until your symptoms abate. They will likely go away and leave you with no lingering problems. Once that's happened, I'd try something other than cannabis or stimulants to test whether you can handle drug use again. And you should really cut down on your drug use in general. Educate yourself on how to use safely and what drugs are safer than others, and measure doses precisely.

Do not do the MDMA.

Good luck.

 

[greengummybear]

Consume your omega 3 and you will be fine. You excessively consumed psychedelics. Your probably noticing details about your perception of reality you hadn't noticed in the past. I recommend abstaining from psychedelics until you are 21 because of this. If you do use stimulants or psychedelics I recommend you consume a single dose of an individual drug then wait a weak. Lots of experiences in short time periods result in difficult integration.

It can take quite a while for people to re-integrate intense psychedelic experiences in their life. For some they bounce back after a few days, for others it takes months.

You say you stopped smoking and taking stims too? That's a good thing but depending on the frequency of your drug use before you stopped smoking, taking stimulants etc, you may also be experiencing stuff like nicotine withdrawal or psychological dependence on other drugs. That can definitely contribute to feeling weird.

Usually the lingering effects of this type of overdose resolve within three weeks. There is usually a strong shift in the subjective effects after 5-6 days then the symptoms smooth out after approximately 10-12 day and taper from there. I agree with sekio. Changing your previous drug use will influence your recovery and possibly dramatically increase the duration of altered perception of reality. You are young and your goal should be landing where you began. I recommend abstaining from psychedelics and maintaining the same lifestyle you had in the past. This means the same diet, the same amount of physical activity, and the same drug use (excluding psychedelics). After a month I recommend you taper off of the other psychoactives until you are older. I could explain my reasoning about abstinence if you inquire.

Remember simply consuming the omega 3 daily will make you feel better as you speed through your recovery.

 

[Ganj]

Will give it two weeks of abstinence and re-judge from there. It's been over a week and the symptoms mentioned are still going strong. It Is hard to tell if they have got better or even worse as there is no relatable point of difference. Everything has just been a bit of a sureal haze since this happened. I'm continuing everything I mentioned. It gets considerably worse as the day goes on. Sleep sort of resets it

 

[AA357]

I and a few others planned to take MDMA this weekend far before this entire ordeal. If the dose is kept low and I do it on enough sleep and continue the positive habits I have picked up since this started (Regular sleep pattern, much better diet, exercise and meditation etc...) will it have any substantial effect on my current issue If I instead take it in a week or two? I hate the idea of completely changing my lifestyle due to this incident but If it really is my long term perception of reality at stake then there's no question involved...

Just do what you feel. A positive MDMA experience might make you forget about last week's ordeal. I honestly believe that the best cure for a bad trip is a good trip.

I once had a real trainwreck trip on acid. I had a panic attack and at the time I remember thinking "I'm never doing drugs again once this wears off". I did feel a bit traumatized the next day but a day or two after that I snorted a big line of DPT and had a GREAT time.

 

[pupnik]

yeah no cannabis for at least a month, after that stay with simple stuff.
youll get some reminders of this time (flashbacks) but they become less and less frequent if you make no big deal about it.

if you medicalize your situation it will get blown out of proportion.

so no weed ok?

 

[Ganj]

Consume your omega 3 and you will be fine. You excessively consumed psychedelics. Your probably noticing details about your perception of reality you hadn't noticed in the past. I recommend abstaining from psychedelics until you are 21 because of this. If you do use stimulants or psychedelics I recommend you consume a single dose of an individual drug then wait a weak. Lots of experiences in short time periods result in difficult integration.



Usually the lingering effects of this type of overdose resolve within three weeks. There is usually a strong shift in the subjective effects after 5-6 days then the symptoms smooth out after approximately 10-12 day and taper from there. I agree with sekio. Changing your previous drug use will influence your recovery and possibly dramatically increase the duration of altered perception of reality. You are young and your goal should be landing where you began. I recommend abstaining from psychedelics and maintaining the same lifestyle you had in the past. This means the same diet, the same amount of physical activity, and the same drug use (excluding psychedelics). After a month I recommend you taper off of the other psychoactives until you are older. I could explain my reasoning about abstinence if you inquire.

Remember simply consuming the omega 3 daily will make you feel better as you speed through your recovery.

Where did you get the numbers 5-6 days and 10-12 or are they just general? Also wise words, mixing multiple drugs in short time frames makes it harder to process them properly.

I have no intentions of smoking weed anytime soon as it exacerbates my anxiety and gave me some minor psychological issues over the years. Took me years of smoking to finally see It wasnt for me. Symptoms are still present yet they have either faded or I have come more to terms with them. I now see the light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[Doldrugs]

I'm glad you're recovering.

 

[dopemaster]

I have never really had a bad trip so it is difficult to input much.

I have had some really bad experiences in life though. I try to just learn from them and gain some insight into my life and the world around me.

I really would not stress what happened to much. You can't undo it, but you can just let it go. I know that sounds easier said than done, but what other choice do you have.

It is best to not dwell on the bad things in life as there are so many good things.

 

[greengummybear]

Where did you get the numbers 5-6 days and 10-12 or are they just general?

Cool bro, I'm glad you are feeling better. I made mistakes when I was younger. We all have to pay for the mistakes we have made ourselves. I learned after mistakes.

 

[Jaia]

Be patient. It will subside eventually, I've been there after quitting bensos cold turkey. Take it as a lesson though, to be honest I think you should not be doing drugs for a looong while, especially considering your age. It's not fun to be stuck in that DR/DP place for a long time...