What's Your Experience with Therapists?

[Gloomp]

For example, I have one because i've been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and addiction. I just so happen to excel at speechcraft, so I often find that she doesnt know what she is doing when I intentionally throw her off the loops. I'm not the easiest bloke to "therapize", so I cut her some slack. One time I kissed her forehead which is grounds for dismissal, but I had established such a relationship that she was just like, "Whatever, see you next week."

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

I too have bipolar and substance abuse in paper.

That's interesting that you kissed her.

My therapist sort of demonizes me at times because it's court ordered, but she really likes me (i think). She always compares me to the wolf of wall street and encourages me to go out and kill it. She really tends to generalize though, and try to put me in a box. Probably the forensic background.

I told her almost everything about myself, and like my parents, she says "nothing you say would suprise me anymore", which is relieving.

I bet most people here would consider her a "bitch", just because she challenges me so much. But i like it. I need the challenge or else why am i there?

I've been in therapy many times.. most people give up on me, and just sort of cringe at everything i say.

 

[Ganjcat]

Once in school I went to one and everyone thought I was working as a snitch because someone I had a right with spread the rumour around to get back of me never seen a psychiatrist since I blamed it on him

 

[Ganjcat]

I defo think I have either bipolar or multi personality thingy, or both amongst others... The more I think about it the more I think the ones WITH all these social defects are the normal ones and the 'normal' ones are the weird ones

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

I once thought i had DiD as well (multiples).

But i've never heard the voices, and "switched". I'm just a social chameleon, i guess.

 

[SunriseChampion]

I was kind of suicidal and depressed but got told I didn't need to come back because I had all the answers after a bit of CBT.

Well, I'm not dead yet and I almost forget what depression feels like so I guess they were right.

I was not about to kiss that old man's forehead or any other part of him though, nope.

In retrospect, I didn't really get much out of it except some weird sense of validation, which I guess was all I needed to fuck off with the bullshit in my head.

All in all, 6/10.

 

[SunriseChampion]

I bet most people here would consider her a "bitch", just because she challenges me so much. But i like it. I need the challenge or else why am i there?

Yeah, that's perfect.

I was told a lot of the shit I was thinking was just stupid, which it was and here I am, not thinking in that way any more.

 

[Jabberwocky]

the purpose of therapy isn't to get one over on your therapist to prove how clever you are. its to heal, which requires a genuine desire to heal and

i had therapy almost constantly from the age of 13 til maybe 25. i gave up cos i wasn't getting any better. in fact in that time i'd been hospitalised twice for anorexia, then got addicted to benzos. none of it helped cos i was people pleasing with the therapist, not being honest. also, i don't think it could really have helped cos none asked me anything about my life really. apart from one specific therapist who i had for help coping with sexual violence.

i started getting better when i got to a very expensive rehab and had shit hot therapists there, and actually wanted to get well, and had to think about not just how i feel, but why and what events in my life, starting from the very beginning, lead me there.

i still have a problem with people pleasing therapists. i scored a couple weeks back and i can't bring myself to tell my addictions therapist cos i don't want her to be disappointed in me or feel like she did a bad job, or not trust me.

 

[Wilson Wilson]

My experience with therapists can be best described as "mixed."

First experience I had with the system I was 17, self-harming, badly depressed, paranoid, really not doing well. When I finally got to actually see someone they had me draw my feelings and talk to me like a kid. Did absolutely nothing to help me. When I turned 18 they kicked me out completely because I was not "severe enough" for the adult services. This was on the NHS.

Second time I had just one session with a private therapist, similarly useless, spent 20 minutes talking to me and tried to tell me I didn't have things I'd long since been diagnosed with based on flimsy reasoning.

Third time was again on the NHS, this time I saw an actual psychiatrist. Spoke to me for about 30 minutes then told me I was BPD. Gave me Valium at least.

Fourth time was a private psychiatrist, but this time someone who knew what they were doing. Told me the BPD diagnosis was bollocks and I just had a bit of anxiety. Also got me treated for ADHD. Wasn't all smooth sailing here either but certainly one of the most positive and overall constructive experiences I had.

At the same time I saw a psychologist who I did CBT with. This was very helpful. Did it for a year. Helped me deal with things a lot better afterwards. Great experience.

Unfortunately it does seem to be the case, if my experiences are anything to go by, that to get proper therapy you need to cough up for private treatment because the NHS is still pretty bloody useless when it comes to mental health.

 

[SunriseChampion]

i still have a problem with people pleasing therapists. i scored a couple weeks back and i can't bring myself to tell my addictions therapist cos i don't want her to be disappointed in me or feel like she did a bad job, or not trust me.

Do you have experience with having been talked down to or looked down on by therapists for your drug use?

I had a friend who was going to see someone and felt so belittled by the therapist's attitude towards him as a drug user that he quit and never went back. Poor bastard ended up in a psychiatric facility and has never regained his mind since. Just kept using and lost it all. It was a fucking tragedy and I couldn't believe someone in a position of trust like that would just chew someone up like that.

 

[Jabberwocky]

i have luckily usually been treated compassionately by therapists. i'm really sorry to hear about your friend. some people get awful luck. a good friend of mine was discharged from NHS psychological help cos they were still using drugs, which meant 'she wasn't committed to getting better.'

one of my trips to the loony bin for anorexia was actually precipitated by me getting super fucked up and hanging out with smackheads, they realised things were about to get a lot worse for me if i didn't get to inpatient right then. i thought they were over reacting at the time but went in any way cos my bmi was gonna hit mandatory hospitalisation within a week anyway, looking back i see that was a kind thing of them to do.

apart from that, i never even hinted at my therapists that i took drugs ever. except one who caught me when i'd been up on mdma all night and was gurning my tits off and couldn't remember the start of a sentence by the end. i don't remember what they had to say about it tbh.

then i took a break from therapy cos i'd figured out what i really needed was just to be fucked up continuously. that escalated a bit lol. wasn't my best idea. so i landed in rehab, skeletal and half dead, and got honest. obviously rehab therapists can't be judgemental. the therapist i have now used to be bad on the dark and light so is in no place to judge, tbh i think that's part of what makes her so good. i don't know why i don't tell her about my lapse, i know it would benefit my recovery to do so.

 

[G_Chem]

They’re all lying fucks that are just as broken as you. The only answers are within, just gotta find a way to get to them.

I’ve had 4-5 at least over the years, mostly as post-incident grief counselor or drug counselors. Time and again information that I told to not share was shared. And not like information that was pertinent to share, like someone maybe getting hurt which I would understand.

My last one I thought was a great guy, really enjoyed seeing him but one day I went in to the outpatient clinic and one of his colleagues came up to me to discuss some what I thought were private topics with me.

I walked out of there and literally threw away the scripts they gave me I was so mad, I wanted zero connection with them.

Now that I’m older, have multiple family members in the healthcare industry, I see firsthand my worries were warranted. People talk, they can’t seem to help themselves.

-GC

 

[Gloomp]

In retrospect, I didn't really get much out of it except some weird sense of validation, which I guess was all I needed to fuck off with the bullshit in my head.

All in all, 6/10.

That's actually quite poignant as relates to my earlier histories with therapists/psychiatrists. Thank you for putting it in such a well-curated erudite manner.

 

[Shady's Fox]

I have a therapist of my own, because of my nightmares. I have them since I was little..

He learnt me to create the so called ''Safe-Box''.

 

[SunriseChampion]

The only answers are within, just gotta find a way to get to them.

That's pretty well the way I see it. The thing is though that most therapists are pretty good at helping people get to those answers within, even if by just showing you how to get there yourself.

I think that's basically the point of them, no? They're there to help one find the answers within.

 

[Jabberwocky]

That's pretty well the way I see it. The thing is though that most therapists are pretty good at helping people get to those answers within, even if by just showing you how to get there yourself.

I think that's basically the point of them, no? They're there to help one find the answers within.

absolutely spot on. there is so much noise in my head i'd never get there on my own, i'm still not good enough at separating stories i tell myself from truth.

 

[JoEhJoEh]

The first time I went to a psychotherapeut was when i was 27, 12 years ago. Because of my nervousness (these times I did not know about my ADHD) I went there. Because the diagnose ADHD in Adults was not discussed by that time we (of course) startet my whole life turning around. He was a genius, knew a lot about everything, had the ability to hear my words and I always could see in his eyes he is trying to feel what I feel. I got to him because a friend of mine recommended him. I saw him, said hello and knew - he is it.

Because the ADHD was not diagnosable we started to talk a lot about my (really mean and bad) family issues. Before I went there I was a grey little mouse, not talking, better nowhere appearing and I took everthing personally. Now I know why, because of my therapeut Andy: I totally compensated my ADHD because from childhood on I just got bad words, punishment, everybody was thinking I'm too lazy for everything, "you could but you do not want" , you are never listening and so on and so on. ADHD-people know what I mean. So, over the years I'm compensated. I said not too much because the outcome was always bad or i was said to be stupid or exaggerating , and so I went into a girl that had such a lot of anger and anxiety but also a lot of power inside me and he told me how to change that with different methods.

He always told me: "JJ, don't think everything will dissapear in two weeks. You have to practice in special situations and come out of your cage. It lasted years.

But i did it. I really did it.I changed. I practiced all that stuff that kept me in my cage over years and after a while i saw: nothing bad happened. People were respecting me , i couldnt believe. And if I hadn't done than, if I hadn't practiced everything he told me, it would have never beenpossible to diagnose me with ADHD from the impulsive type.


So, thank you Andy, I love you, I hated you so much meanwhile but I was allowed to beat you, that was great :D
If I wouldn't have you, I would be just a bunch of a depressed grey mouse that is always sad and says nothing, even when its really necessary.

I thank my psychotherapist a thousand times. And I was also glad I don't have to see so many different people because of no sympathy, no whatever. He was the first and he ist still. When somethings wrong, I call him.

So I'm sorry for you guys who were not that lucky. But try, try, try - anytime you'll find the right human being that you can trust and really work with.

JJ

 

[tracedwards313]

I have tried many times but have never had anything worthwhile come of it. I often dont trust them to know what's best for me or to care.

I had to have someone that didn't feel intellectually beneath me, but then I didn't want to listen to the one telling me the blunt truth either.

Also, its totally pointless if you are using drugs, which I mostly was.

 

[Coffeeshroom]

from my exp, i had a few that were more fuct/nodding on there own meds. Like through the session i can see the shrink nodding off as im talking to him and the rest never really gave a crap and just wanted to prescribe meds for me

Finally later on i got a shrink that actually cared and really tried to help me but they one in a million, most are only worried about the quantity off people they can see a day and the money they make off it

 

[I_Hate_This_Place]

They’re all lying fucks that are just as broken as you. The only answers are within, just gotta find a way to get to them.

I’ve had 4-5 at least over the years, mostly as post-incident grief counselor or drug counselors. Time and again information that I told to not share was shared. And not like information that was pertinent to share, like someone maybe getting hurt which I would understand.

My last one I thought was a great guy, really enjoyed seeing him but one day I went in to the outpatient clinic and one of his colleagues came up to me to discuss some what I thought were private topics with me.

I walked out of there and literally threw away the scripts they gave me I was so mad, I wanted zero connection with them.

Now that I’m older, have multiple family members in the healthcare industry, I see firsthand my worries were warranted. People talk, they can’t seem to help themselves.

-GC

from my exp, i had a few that were more fuct/nodding on there own meds. Like through the session i can see the shrink nodding off as im talking to him and the rest never really gave a crap and just wanted to prescribe meds for me

Finally later on i got a shrink that actually cared and really tried to help me but they one in a million, most are only worried about the quantity off people they can see a day and the money they make off it

Seconded. My experiences were that of having information shared inappropriately despite being extremely vigilant about paperwork, permissions, what I would or wouldn't sign, getting permission to view various notes, etc.

I'm in no way downplaying Theraphy BTW. Please don't take my post as being anti-therapy! For some people it is a useful & in some cases it can be a necessary tool at that. CBT for example can be a fine tool. I've used it myself in the treatment of my wife's OCD symptoms with great success.

Now that I stated that & moving on in my personal experiences "professional" therapy has done nothing for me or my wife. In my case information sharing issues or the therapist being on more drugs / fucked up than I was often was an issue. Again it likely doesn't help that like the OP I have patterns that can interfere with therapy. In my wife's case therapy & the medical system in general have absolutely failed to a miserable degree. Trying to use talk therapy on someone who is schizophrenic with comorbid anxiety & MDD is an exercise in futility if the patient isn't properly medicated. Sadly enough getting her properly diagnosed & medicated has been another exercise in futility. I have a thread regarding some questions about that particular issue (Aripiprazole & Selegiline Interactions) already posted in ADD but I digress. (Sorry for the off-topic but I figure more potential eyeballs can't hurt. )

That's pretty well the way I see it. The thing is though that most therapists are pretty good at helping people get to those answers within, even if by just showing you how to get there yourself.

I think that's basically the point of them, no? They're there to help one find the answers within.

A valid point. I'd like to combine that the conclusion I'm about to come to below. The problem with therapy in the example I'm using being that a therapist can't help someone find answers that aren't there. Or in the case of patients that need medication they can't for example talk hallucinations away. So I'd have to say I agree with you. Therapy can help find answers that are there to find. It's just that one needs to get to a place where there are answers to be found before therapy can help one find said answers.

To sum up the anecdotal experiences of myself, my wife & those I've spoken to therapy can be of great benefit with caveats.

The caveats being that only certain people respond to therapy. The patient must be receptive to therapy. The patient must also be properly medicated if the conditions affecting them warrant medicating. As like I stated you can't talk therapy schizophrenia away; for example. Another major caveat being that one must find a therapist the works for you. As others have stated it can be difficult to find a therapist that you feel comfortable with. Just as importantly finding one that doesn't have to high a case load or another factor that prevents them from focusing on your case can also be difficult.. Also factors such as finding one that doesn't spread information inappropriately, doesn't have there own problems & is capable of investing the time & effort needed to help you with the issues that one is seeing the therapist for can also be challenging.

All in all or TL;DR therapy can be beneficial for the right individual if the therapist & the individual both meet the right criteria for having therapy be successful. It's clearly a complicated picture that can vary widely from person to person in terms of individual appropriateness & efficacy.