Weed abuse caused me severe anxiety issues until I quit and then I have slowly been recovering ever since. All of this was directly caused by weed abuse since I only ever experienced extreme anxiety when I was stoned. I was severely addicted so when I started experiencing these side effects, a few years into a habitual habit, it took a while for me to beat the cravings, rebound suicidal depression, and weeks of appetite suppression upon cessation (when I finally quit, I puked hundreds of times those first few weeks and lost a ridiculous amount of weight). I didn't always have these effects from weed, but they came after I started smoking it all day for a while, maybe after 5 years of being a regular pothead.
-Social anxiety: I had constructive relationships with women before I started smoking weed all day. Throughout my time as a pothead, I was extremely angry and sexually frustrated because I could no longer communicate to women. When I quit smoking weed, I regained my ability to form relationships with females. I struggle with regret due to these wasted years, since I knew the whole time that it was the weed but I couldn't quit. Not really though because I have no troubles with this ever since I quit and for the most part recovered.
->This was a consequence of the more fundamental issue that cannabis had completely destroyed my ability to socialize, to communicate, and to have self confidence in myself. It would take months of abstinence for me to recover from these issues, while in the meantime weed would always ease the pain since I experienced severe rebound depression in the form of inexplicable suicidal thoughts and I would cut myself. Otherwise I've never had this problem, only in the few months after quitting a miserable weed habit.
-Public speaking: Before I started smoking weed, I was a public speaking award winner. As a pothead, whether or not I was stoned, my communication skills had gone to such garbage that I was a noticeably nervous wreck when public speaking and I had developed a phobia of it. Presently I am comfortable public speaking again.
Job interviews/applications: This was related to how weed destroyed my self confidence. Normally I hold myself in high regard, and I have a healthy self esteem. Weed turned me into a huge pussy and I kind of just mumbled and was much less assertive because I couldn't express my thoughts with any clarity. I would be extremely anxious during interviews to the extent that it was a phobia and a huge problem considering I needed $20,000 a year just to support my smoking habit.
-Urinating: As a stoner, I was not able to urinate in public places. That dope habit made me fuckin' weird... or more like a huge pussy
-Loneliness: I was frightened that I would be alone forever. Weed always turned me into a pussy like that. Now I am a man again.
Severe depression related to the anxiety: When I was a pothead, I was severely depressed. There was a direct correlation, and at the time my feelings were that I despised being a pothead so incredibly much and I hated myself for it but I thought that since I wasn't capable of stopping that the only way out was suicide.
Lack of decision making skills: Weed compromised the part of my brain that is responsible for decision making. I struggled to decide whether to go for a swim, or go for a bike ride. I was literally retarded. I'm a manager of engineering now. lol.
Cities/society: I was frightened of man-made spaces, and preferred to be alone in the woods.
Panic attacks: Around half the time I smoked pot, I would experience full blown panic attacks. Now I suffer from panic disorder as a result of the abuse. I would be feeling perfectly physically comfortable, and then smoke a hit of weed. My heart would tighten in my chest and I would feel like I was having a heart attack. This physical anxiety happened so commonly that eventually it transitioned into my sober state of consciousness after a few years of being addicted to a drug that triggered panic attacks. How can you crave something that makes you have a panic attack? I was extremely overwhelmed by unbearable cravings against my will... and eventually the physical stuff fucked me over big-time
Not too mention that stuff turned me into a complete idiot. I lost my ability to think creatively, and also to work as an engineer. I had to quit my job and take time off for my #1 priority and the only thing I was interested in at the time: smoking weed non-stop. I was extremely slow-witted at the time and would always think of good things to say 5 minutes too late.
These days, I haven't smoked in 2 years. I have completely changed. I have a healthy level of anxiety now, apart from my panic disorder which was triggered by heavy hash oil abuse and which I'm recovering from. I still have social anxiety, but I am comfortable with it. I am very comfortable in my own skin, I don't want to escape anymore. Smoking weed was the worst thing that ever happened to me and it took an intervention for me to quit, I was too much of an uncontrollable fiend to stop on my own. It wrecked my body and mind big-time, as if people think this garbage is harmless.
At the end of the day I managed to quit and I have made something of myself. I live a really happy life and everything worked out for me after I quit. I ruined a decade of my life smoking this disgusting filth and I'll never get that time back. I really regret ever smoking weed, but on the bright side at least I managed to quit. I don't think huffing gasoline would have fucked my life up half as much.
You might be asking me what was the point, which is an easy question to answer. The point was to ward off unbearable withdrawal symptoms that would last months, quell cravings that would literally take over my entire mind, and above all, to get a big hit. I just needed a hit, it never made any god damned sense. The only time it made sense was when I was goofing off as a young high school student before I surreptitiously became addicted without warning.
or both!
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")