Recovery What is YOUR definition of sobriety?

[TripSitterNZ]

sobriety for me would be giving up everything including caffeine caffiene i believe is causing shit loads of depression in the world and most people dont realize it. Every day i go back to drinking it when i get busy i feel like shooting myself in the head by the end of the day.

I don't even view LSD as a drug i view it as a pharmaceutical medinece given to us by GOD himself to spread his message of love.

 

[tubgirl.jpg]

i am not, nor have i ever been, on maintenence.

but in my head at least, if someone is using no drugs above their script, its exactly whats needed to hold them and no more, and they are making psychological progress and getting on with their life then the only difference between me (or at least me last year when i was doing complete abstinence from all drugs) and them is that i've done my rattle already.

it is more complex than that cos i have seen enough people who seemed very stable in recovery relapse while trying to get off their scripts, and i'm not at that risk.

mostly though i don't care much about the normativity of meaning. as long as we can understand each other. i find emotional sobriety more important from a long term recovery perspective.

Look, I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with not being sober. I'm not sober, but I wouldn't say I am either.
I don't use 'pigs' when I talk about meatballs, because that would be utterly confusing and it's either a lie on my behalf or ignorance. It's great that people are getting better, but we begin to can't deconstruct what words actually mean?

 

[Jabberwocky]

It's great that people are getting better, but we begin to can't deconstruct what words actually mean?

well if you want to deconstruct the actual meaning, i just googled the definition of sober and it is 'not under the influence of alcohol, not drunk' which makes no mention of opiate maintenance.

if someone is on a dose that just prevents you from getting ill with no recreational affects then i wouldn't describe them as under the influence of opiates, i wouldn't describe them as clean either, but i think they are capable of reaching a state of emotional sobriety. i don't know if this is my autism, i don't understand language the same way as most people and am not looking to inadvertently pick a fight because of my weird word processing.

i actually do call meats by their animal names. i've been vegetarian for over 25 years and think its gross that people use language to try and hide the fact they are consuming a sentient being for pleasure.

 

[tubgirl.jpg]

well if you want to deconstruct the actual meaning, i just googled the definition of sober and it is 'not under the influence of alcohol, not drunk' which makes no mention of opiate maintenance.

It reads very clearly, "Sobriety is the condition of not having any measurable levels or effects from alcohol or drugs" pretty much everywhere.
Medical Dictionary; "1. Not intoxicated by alcohol or psychoactive drugs, including recreational drugs."

if someone is on a dose that just prevents you from getting ill with no recreational affects then i wouldn't describe them as under the influence of opiates, i wouldn't describe them as clean either, but i think they are capable of reaching a state of emotional sobriety.

But that's the thing - and I really don't mean any disrespect here - but it doesn't really matter what you think it is. It doesn't change what the word pertains. I doesn't matter what I ascribe to it. This is my whole point. And they still have a measurable amount of the drug in their system, even if they aren't getting high. It's very simple semantics.

i don't know if this is my autism, i don't understand language the same way as most people and am not looking to inadvertently pick a fight because of my weird word processing.

I'm not trying to pick a fight either. If I met someone on maintenance, I would never try to put them down by saying that they're "not sober".
I just find it fascinating that nobody seems to care about this obvious cognitive dissonance.

i actually do call meats by their animal names. i've been vegetarian for over 25 years and think its gross that people use language to try and hide the fact they are consuming a sentient being for pleasure.

I totally get that.

 

[Kittycat5]

As Sober As You Need to Be. I legit wanna start a rehab and call it this.

 

[VerbalTruist]

tubgirl.jpg your line-by-line argumentation on the definition of sober, is a bit much. Sobriety is what we make of it. There are so many opinions on what sobriety is: dictionary, medical, recovery (AA, NA, etc.), religious (Christian, Buddhist, and on), socially, and so on. You say you aren't trying to pick a fight, but what you are saying indicates otherwise and feels passive aggressive with the smiley at the end. Because there are so many varied definitions and because of people who make the statement "Sober is completely clean, nothing in the system." I say "I have been active in recovery for nearly 10 years."

What does that statement of being active in recovery mean? It means that I'm an addict and I fucking know it. I know that if I start using opiates again, I will very likely end up killing myself or putting my life into a place where I never want to be. So, I go to AA meetings. I go to AA bc every NA meeting I was in had a lot less stability and people were a lot more militant about being "SOBER". If that's what you want, cool. I know that opiate maintenance saved my life. It was only in the last year that I have been able to no longer be reliant on it. It took me 9 years of self-work to get to that point. It isn't just working a program either. I meditate daily. I read, write, think, and talk about philosophy & theology with people. I have a sponsor who knows that I will occasionally have 1 beer with a friend. Also, I work with people who are also addicts. I talk to a therapist. My wife and I talk about it and because we talk about it our marriage is pretty good. Past that, I have done academic work in the past (grad school) on how people communicate regarding recovery, addiction, and sobriety. (A big thank you to Bluelight for being part of my data for that work.)

By my definition, as someone who can speak to it from a lived, practiced, and academic standpoint, sobriety is: "Refraining from the use of substances that I know will cause harm to my well-being." That's the short version. If anyone wants to have a serious conversation with me about it, I am happy to do so. I am not anonymous on Bluelight, if you want to Zoom or call to talk about it, I'm up for that. This notion that sobriety is a fixed definition, and that the fixed definition can work for everyone... That isn't something that works or is healthy for a lot of addicts I know, including myself.