what has worked the best for recovering from long term comedowns

[Tpchan85]

These posts are great. I assume there are a lot of people like me out there who are suffering these horrible long comedowns and I actually found very little information or similar experiences searching google for hours every day. It wasn't until about month 2 that I found peoples stories here on bluelight and it was immediately reassuring, helped change my outlook and I'm now nearly recovered. I've lurked here for a month or so and finally decided to make an account and post to get more information out there. I wish I would have read and understood the true effect abusing MDMA can have on a person. I always viewed panic attacks, anxiety, depression as purely psychological, it wasn't until I was experiencing tachycardia and irregular heart beats that I realised the seriousness.

PMZ, Futura and FirstBadComedown and others your posts are doing a great service here, I just wish I had have seen them beforehand then maybe I would have treated MDMA with the respect it deserves. Thank you.

 

[PJ2]

1. Sleep - I feel the best when I get the best sleep. I know this is not always easy. Melatonin with Theanine makes me pretty sleepy usually and I get deeper sleep most nights. This is probably my biggest problem/struggle at this point.
2. Exercise - Next most important thing to good sleep especially running. It's great for brain recovery and to control symptoms.
3. Water - I seem to have a higher need for more water intake these days. I don't know why, but I feel better when I am more than well hydrated.
4. Acceptance - Stop trying to figure out what happened. Does it really matter? Recovery is the most important thing. Focus your energies here.
5. Time - It seems the brain can and will recover to a very high degree, but it is measured in many many months or even years.
6. Diet - I think nutrition is obviously important, but over time the impact of diet is less important. In the beginning, a pizza could send me into an anxiety attack. Now, there is no discernible difference from "normal."
7. Nootropics - Brain food. It makes sense to me to supply the brain with nutrients it likes in the form of supplements and vitamins. I take Noopept, which I personally recommend. Plus, the typical suspects Fish Oil, B-6, Daily Vitamin etc.. As with diet, the noticeable impact of taking these daily seems to have diminished. There was a time when it was critical to making it through the day.

 

[happy_dude]

For me it was all about NOT doing things. When I stopped:

- drinking
- smoking
- weed
- coke
- pills
- hanging around with people who do these these things

I soon got better.

One thing I never had was the knowledge that other people have suffered from this and recovered from it. That knowledge alone would have helped me so much, knowing that it's just a case of "when" I recover and not "if".

 

[pmz]

For me it was all about NOT doing things. When I stopped:

- drinking
- smoking
- weed
- coke
- pills
- hanging around with people who do these these things

I soon got better.

One thing I never had was the knowledge that other people have suffered from this and recovered from it. That knowledge alone would have helped me so much, knowing that it's just a case of "when" I recover and not "if".

Just curious. Now that your recovered. Have you picked up again on any of the above? Or dabbled with anything

 

[PJ2]

For me it was all about NOT doing things. When I stopped:

- drinking
- smoking
- weed
- coke
- pills
- hanging around with people who do these these things

I soon got better.

One thing I never had was the knowledge that other people have suffered from this and recovered from it. That knowledge alone would have helped me so much, knowing that it's just a case of "when" I recover and not "if".

Yeah, I can't believe you were able to continue doing those things. I would've been hospitalized for sure. I can't even tolerate caffeine anymore. I do miss my occasional gram of coke, but I won't consider it until I've been recovered for some time.

 

[thejibberman]

Acceptance is a high factor of my recovery, once I told myself "yeah this has happened, but lets flow with it until it dies out" (2 months in) so often, I got so much better. I felt so bad for 2 months and it really got to me, then I just couldn't be bothered and in the last 5 weeks I've improved SO MUCH EVERYDAY.

Another big thing was staying off this website. I joined this website because I was faulty, requiring help and advice. Now it's just a bad memory. Even now when I check a couple of times a week, it makes me a little anxious. But then I remember that being in that position sucks and giving advice is good.

Socialising is obviously a great thing as you've mentioned. Recently I've been speaking to this girl and it's taken my mind off absolutely everything. Forgiving myself about taking the MDMA and just getting on with talking to people took a load of weight off my shoulders.

Lastly. Family. My mother has had to put up with my updating her how I felt everyday for the first 2 months, and what I could have possibly done to myself and how much I need to see the doctor, behind me every step of the way and I really don't know what I would have done by myself. I was so sure death was so nearby. If you can, just relax with your family for a good month or two, they are your parents and should be looking after you no matter what age you are. My mum actually enjoyed it in a way because she still felt useful as a mother (as I live at university and leave a lot).

I know it's nice to feel not alone here suffering from the LTC, but when you stop coming here, you begin to accept yourself as someone who isn't suffering from anything. I really believe as helpful this website was, it held me back a LOT.

I still take supplements sometimes, but that's not because I'm suffering with a LTC, just because sometimes I feel like I'm having a shitty day, and having a shitty day sometimes is not your LTC. It's just life.

 

[me2point0]

Wow I see lots of people who share that with their mom/dad/siblings holy shit. Thats very good and gutsy

 

[happy_dude]

Just curious. Now that your recovered. Have you picked up again on any of the above? Or dabbled with anything

Yeah, I have done all of those things since I recovered with no or little ill effects. But in the last 5 years I have only done weed very occasionally. I am still massively concerned that even just one does might trigger all the bad things again and the risk is just not worth it. I cannot go back to a LTC.

One thing I have't done is found friends like this. I have moved on and accepted that these things aren't part of my life anymore. It took a while, and sometimes I look back longingly, but I have now come to accept that my wreckless years are over.

 

[happy_dude]

Yeah, I can't believe you were able to continue doing those things. I would've been hospitalized for sure. I can't even tolerate caffeine anymore. I do miss my occasional gram of coke, but I won't consider it until I've been recovered for some time.

Most of my problems were mental. I don't ever recall ever having any respiratory issues or really strong physical problems.

 

[pmz]

Yeah, I have done all of those things since I recovered with no or little ill effects. But in the last 5 years I have only done weed very occasionally. I am still massively concerned that even just one does might trigger all the bad things again and the risk is just not worth it. I cannot go back to a LTC.

One thing I have't done is found friends like this. I have moved on and accepted that these things aren't part of my life anymore. It took a while, and sometimes I look back longingly, but I have now come to accept that my wreckless years are over.

I'm a little confused. You have tripped, rolled, drank, got high and so on AFTER you recovered? What are you scared of might trigger you back in then?

Or do those things with yet have a fear remain than something might happen?

 

[pmz]

Just curious. What's anyone's take on the whole music thing I experiance?

I can't tell if it's a metal thing that in not allowing my self to enjoy music or trying too hard. Or if there might be a chemical, not enough serotonin thing happening.

 

[Dawglaw]

PMZ - I do not know but my opinion is that it is probably psychological. You got bit by something you used to enjoy music and your mind is reacting to it.

The first time I had a mind blowing musical experience after my comedown was last month when I rolled at Coachella. I got chills down my spine. I don't know if that was just the drugs doing their job or something in my mind that clicked.

I have noticed that since Coachella, I have enjoyed EDM sober more than I usually do.

 

[JWills20]

The first time I had a mind blowing musical experience after my comedown was last month when I rolled at Coachella. I got chills down my spine. I don't know if that was just the drugs doing their job or something in my mind that clicked.

I have noticed that since Coachella, I have enjoyed EDM sober more than I usually do.

Those tingles, that's the MDMA body high and my is it beautiful. Can also relate to enjoying EDM more sober as a result.

 

[happy_dude]

I'm a little confused. You have tripped, rolled, drank, got high and so on AFTER you recovered? What are you scared of might trigger you back in then?

Or do those things with yet have a fear remain than something might happen?

Yes, I've done all of those since recovering - pills, weed, coke, booze, mephedrone. It didn't cause another long term comedown, but I am worried that it could. And the risk of getting high vs long-term comedown which would ruin all my hard work in recovery is nowhere near worth it.

 

[pmz]

PMZ - I do not know but my opinion is that it is probably psychological. You got bit by something you used to enjoy music and your mind is reacting to it.

The first time I had a mind blowing musical experience after my comedown was last month when I rolled at Coachella. I got chills down my spine. I don't know if that was just the drugs doing their job or something in my mind that clicked.

I have noticed that since Coachella, I have enjoyed EDM sober more than I usually do.

This is what I'm thinking as well. Not sure how to let go of an expectation I might he holding.

So you have rolled again no prob? That's dope. No come down after? Care to share about the experience and what made you feel comfortable enough to roll again.
And how long after you recovered was that?

 

[pmz]

Ok, So I went to yoga class today and it brought up a lot of negative emotions. Earlier in the day, I was feeling great. Feeling very mindful the entire day, yet during yoga class my mind exploded into a distracted, angry, aggressive, depressed and anxious state. That energy is no longer here. And Im glade I was able to let it flow out and not hold on to it. I once would hold on that energy once it started like this for days and could not let it go.

I felt confused thought, because part of me was telling me to never go to this type of yoga class again (the type of class is what brought it out. Not yoga in general). Its a class that is supposed to frustrate you and push your emotional and physical limits. I felt like I want to avoid anything that makes me feel this way.
Yet after talking to a few people, I was told that is a good thing. To have emotions like that get released. That it is a way of actually releasing the stored emotions in me that need to go. That makes sense. Its just bringing energy and emotion to the surface so I can get them out. And was told to continue going to that class as it is a sign of healing and letting go.

Thought I would share this and see what others think.

I did notice that while in class, I was hating everything around me. The instructor, the other students, my life, just everything. For no reason. I was good all day, and didnt let anything bother me, yet now, in a yoga class, I felt like how I felt months ago, miserable. Though, there was a point, I noticed this destructive way of thinking and told my self that I think I need to surrender to these feelings and stop trying to feel better or change how I feel. Once I started to surrender to how I was feeling, and stopped trying to change that negative energy I was feeling, I actually didnt feel like I was suffering as much, even though I was still feeling the same. The anger changed, and I let it build into a need to strengthen my self. I walked out of class feeling very disassociated and frustrated, yet I knew I had to just let this energy flow out of me, rather than focusing on how much it sucks and wanting to get rid of it. I let myself process how I was feeling and the feeling naturally subsided. So now here I am talking about this, and I do not feel the same way at all. I let go of that energy and I feel good about that.

So maybe that was healing.

 

[Dawglaw]

This is what I'm thinking as well. Not sure how to let go of an expectation I might he holding.

So you have rolled again no prob? That's dope. No come down after? Care to share about the experience and what made you feel comfortable enough to roll again.
And how long after you recovered was that?

Yah. I have rolled three times since my initial "comedown"

One was exactly 12 months to the day after "the night" and I retriggered comedown symptoms (anxiety, blurry vision, brain fog and NASTY DP/DR) for about 4 days until I was able to use mindfulness and my past experience to snap out of it.

My next experience was Coachella which was about 22 months after "the night." I hippyflipped with 4acodmt and MDMA. The idea of a comedown was such a distant memory and I had been symptom free entirely for over a year so I said fuck it why not. I wanted to prove to myself that my experience, while terrible, was entirely psychosomatic. I had an absolute amazing time with NO comedown at all after. The week after, I didn't even really worry about a comedown and I felt fine.

My third experience was exactly 24 months after the "the night" and I rolled again. I had a great time and absolutely no comedown.

Pretty crazy, huh?

 

[pmz]

Yah. I have rolled three times since my initial "comedown"

One was exactly 12 months to the day after "the night" and I retriggered comedown symptoms (anxiety, blurry vision, brain fog and NASTY DP/DR) for about 4 days until I was able to use mindfulness and my past experience to snap out of it.

My next experience was Coachella which was about 22 months after "the night." I hippyflipped with 4acodmt and MDMA. The idea of a comedown was such a distant memory and I had been symptom free entirely for over a year so I said fuck it why not. I wanted to prove to myself that my experience, while terrible, was entirely psychosomatic. I had an absolute amazing time with NO comedown at all after. The week after, I didn't even really worry about a comedown and I felt fine.

My third experience was exactly 24 months after the "the night" and I rolled again. I had a great time and absolutely no comedown.

Pretty crazy, huh?

wow crazy. amazing how the mind works. Im really trying to figure out what I can do to stop feeling so disconnected to the rest of my body. Its not bothering me nearly as much as it once had, yet it still remains constant. 14 months later. The DR is still holding strong. DP is still there. I feel disconnected and quite numb on a lot of my emotions. I guess Im one of the unlucky 2 year guys. Handing things amazingly better as of lately. I can feel its coming to a end slowly though. scarely slow, but slow.

 

[Dawglaw]

Hey man, hang in there. You sound like you are close. Keep your spirits up.

It's a long journey but it will be over soon.

 

[pmz]

Hey man, hang in there. You sound like you are close. Keep your spirits up.

It's a long journey but it will be over soon.

yeah I know. Just frustrated my vision and disconnection is still so present. I havent been getting depressed like I used to. Which is actually pretty amazing. I feel so much more control. But the disconnection keeps pulling me back in. Ive been good at talkig my self out of it lately. which was impossible a few months ago.

ADDITION: I've been thinking of this lately. I think I've been trying too hard to recover. I feel like I need to learn how to take things as they are and go with it and stop trying to change it for what it is. I'm getting better with this. But it's still a challenge for me. I do way to much comparing and I almost don't know how not to do that.