F
foxinsox
Guest
This probably belongs in mental health somewhere.
I don't know what to do. My anxiety has gone through the roof. I had a day long panic attack. I went to the ER out of total desperation to end it (i couldn't think straight enough to consider how to kill myself at the time). And they gave me some meds that made it alright for a while. I didn't like how much of a zombie they made me feel but they kept things okay. But they gave a limited amount. They said they'd refer me to a mental health clinic... I waited days and days for that call, going through the meds during this time. Finally I called the hospital and they said they never got any referral. I made the stupid fucking appointment and I couldn't make it until like a week later. I go there today, having taken my last pill to last me through the day.
I thought this would at least be step 1, seeing a therapist. I know maybe step 2, meds that i probably need until i can work through all this, probably wouldn't happen right away. But this wasn't step 1. This was fucking step 0. She just talked to me to get an idae of who of their therapists would be the best fit for me. She told me it will probably take a week for them to call me. A week to fucking set up an APPOINTMENT, which could very well be set up months from now for all I fucking know. I basically started having a panic attack right thena dn there but she just told me like HEY TAKE WALKS AND TALK TO PEOPLE evn though i told her befoer that these thigns DO NOT HELP ME, ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN IT'S THIS INTENSE. She said to just go to the ER then if it gets that bad again. I don't want to go to the ER! The ER made my panic attack worse! The ER leaves you for hours without any of your personal belongings or any way to contact anyone! The ER forces you to drag someone along to sit there for fucking HOURS having no idea what's going on! The ER probably wouldn't even give me anything more if I went again! I do not have the money for another fucking ER visit when I didn't have the money for the first one to begin with.
She basically just shrugged and sent me home, crying and shuddering the whole way. Why the fuck is this okay? What am I supposed to do? Why is this acceptable? The only emergency mental health care they have is "GO TO THE ER" or "GET HOSPITALIZED"? I do not have money! I can not do this! These things will make my anxiety skyrocket either way! Holy fuck, just what do they expect me to do?? Self medicate? Kill myself? Beacuse it sure seems like those are my only acceptable options right now. Too fucking bad I don't have the money or means to do either one of those things ao I just haev to sit here and rot with no way to even ease this?
I don't even know why I'm posting, as usual. I don't know what to do. You can't help me. I'm just fucked.
I don't know what to do. My anxiety has gone through the roof. I had a day long panic attack. I went to the ER out of total desperation to end it (i couldn't think straight enough to consider how to kill myself at the time). And they gave me some meds that made it alright for a while. I didn't like how much of a zombie they made me feel but they kept things okay. But they gave a limited amount. They said they'd refer me to a mental health clinic... I waited days and days for that call, going through the meds during this time. Finally I called the hospital and they said they never got any referral. I made the stupid fucking appointment and I couldn't make it until like a week later. I go there today, having taken my last pill to last me through the day.
I thought this would at least be step 1, seeing a therapist. I know maybe step 2, meds that i probably need until i can work through all this, probably wouldn't happen right away. But this wasn't step 1. This was fucking step 0. She just talked to me to get an idae of who of their therapists would be the best fit for me. She told me it will probably take a week for them to call me. A week to fucking set up an APPOINTMENT, which could very well be set up months from now for all I fucking know. I basically started having a panic attack right thena dn there but she just told me like HEY TAKE WALKS AND TALK TO PEOPLE evn though i told her befoer that these thigns DO NOT HELP ME, ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN IT'S THIS INTENSE. She said to just go to the ER then if it gets that bad again. I don't want to go to the ER! The ER made my panic attack worse! The ER leaves you for hours without any of your personal belongings or any way to contact anyone! The ER forces you to drag someone along to sit there for fucking HOURS having no idea what's going on! The ER probably wouldn't even give me anything more if I went again! I do not have the money for another fucking ER visit when I didn't have the money for the first one to begin with.
She basically just shrugged and sent me home, crying and shuddering the whole way. Why the fuck is this okay? What am I supposed to do? Why is this acceptable? The only emergency mental health care they have is "GO TO THE ER" or "GET HOSPITALIZED"? I do not have money! I can not do this! These things will make my anxiety skyrocket either way! Holy fuck, just what do they expect me to do?? Self medicate? Kill myself? Beacuse it sure seems like those are my only acceptable options right now. Too fucking bad I don't have the money or means to do either one of those things ao I just haev to sit here and rot with no way to even ease this?
I don't even know why I'm posting, as usual. I don't know what to do. You can't help me. I'm just fucked.