WD's are bad, but seeking employment while in WD is beyond bad...

[InfectedWithDrugs]

I am in benzo/gabapentin/tiagabine WD ATM and I am trying to tackle 4 things at once:
1. Get better from WD (only time heals)
2. Get ripped/shredded (already went from 220lbs to 183lbs @ 6ft in 4 months, but need 3 more months to get ripped)
3. Get a job

I am not sure how to prioritize it. Does it make sense to be dating while in benzo WD? Does it make sense to be seeking employment? I've been long-term unemployed after an accident that almost left me paralyzed from the neck down, requiring multiple back surgeries, which took years to recover from. Then it took even more time to recover from opiate dependence (now fully resolved - Thank God!) When you have anxiety through the roof, potential employers catch that. Plus, there's the whole brain fog and lowered IQ that occurs during benzo WD - blanking out and stuff.

This is such a mind-fuck. Only time will help with WD symptoms, but sitting and waiting for things to resolve is wasteful. At the same time, doing things like looking for a job also feels wasteful because the current state of mind if wrecked to shits.

 

[Nixiam]

If you aren't being sustained financially right now, I'd throw the job at the top of the list.

If you are, just work on healing. Pretty sure that was only 3 things!!

 

[Moreaux]

You have some pretty solid goals. How long have you been taking benzos/gabapenton/tiagabine? Are you doing a taper? How long have you been in withdrawal? Are you taking any other medications or recreational substances? My answer to your question is dependent on your answer to those questions ?

Not knowing that information, I would advise to resolve the withdrawal of at all possible. Since you don't have a job currently, starting a new job while in GABAergic withdrawal will be very difficult as you will be going through a lot mentally and physically, and stopping GABAergics increases anxiety for a while along with clouding one's mind. Of course, if you've stopped them a while ago and are almost finished with withdrawal then you should probably focus on the job.

If I were in your position this would be my priority list:

1. Resolve withdrawal and get to a stable place mentally
2. Get a job - something that pays the bills and will not add a lot of stress to life so I can still focus on recovering
3. Work on body building and use this as an opportunity to work on myself holistically
3a. Develope a healthy diet
3 b. Develope good sleep hygiene and stay on a set schedule
3c. Learn meditation techniques and develope those skills while working out
3d. Get to a happy place physically - this will have a significant impact mentally
4. Begin dating again - healthy people attract other healthy people. If one is not mentally healthy one will not attract a mentally healthy mate which can add a lot of stress and drama and can end up being a huge set back.

Let me know where you're at with withdrawal - I have a lot of experience with benzos. I was in Xanax daily as prescribed for 10 years. My rehab cut me off cold turkey and I went through a couple of years of hell. I had horrible anxiety and was not very cognitively functional, so it took a while before I could go back to work. I tried a couple of times to go back to work to early and it didn't end well. I also have several tips and tricks for dealing with the withdrawal - particularly the anxiety piece.

 

[InfectedWithDrugs]

I quit Xanax 2 years ago and Gabapentin + Tiagabine 2 months who, which caused precipitation of benzo-like WD that is on-going. Its nowhere as bad as Xanax WD (that was HELL!), but I have 3 major problems and conflicts:
1. Formication (itching as if 1000 of bugs crawling all over me, gets worse at night) - its purely psychological
2. Sweaty palms and feet + extremities going cold sometimes
3. INSOMNIA - I went 8 days without sleep and then finally gave in and took 20mb Ambien + 0.6mg of Clonidine to pass out. Taking Ambien during such WD is a NO-NO and set me back weeks!

LUCKILY, my mood is great and I have 0 anxiety. In fact, I can even take Dextroamphetamine 10mg and not experience any anxiety. INSOMNIA and FORMICATION are the debilitating effects and they go together. Some medications like Mirtazapine and Clonidine help me sleep, BUT they raise blood sugar and cause weight gain. I don't know how long this insomnia and formication effects are going to last - I think 1-2 months top. During that time, even if I diet religiously, lift weights, and do cardio, I will still gain 10+ lbs because of these vicious medicines. Luckily, I think it is mostly water-weight because once I get off them, I lose 10lbs in a week. The same thing happened with Gabapentin, which caused weight gain. Once I went cold turkey on it, 1 week later I was 10lbs lighter.

 

[somnilicious]

You have some pretty solid goals. How long have you been taking benzos/gabapenton/tiagabine? Are you doing a taper? How long have you been in withdrawal? Are you taking any other medications or recreational substances? My answer to your question is dependent on your answer to those questions ?

Not knowing that information, I would advise to resolve the withdrawal of at all possible. Since you don't have a job currently, starting a new job while in GABAergic withdrawal will be very difficult as you will be going through a lot mentally and physically, and stopping GABAergics increases anxiety for a while along with clouding one's mind. Of course, if you've stopped them a while ago and are almost finished with withdrawal then you should probably focus on the job.

If I were in your position this would be my priority list:

1. Resolve withdrawal and get to a stable place mentally
2. Get a job - something that pays the bills and will not add a lot of stress to life so I can still focus on recovering
3. Work on body building and use this as an opportunity to work on myself holistically
3a. Develope a healthy diet
3 b. Develope good sleep hygiene and stay on a set schedule
3c. Learn meditation techniques and develope those skills while working out
3d. Get to a happy place physically - this will have a significant impact mentally
4. Begin dating again - healthy people attract other healthy people. If one is not mentally healthy one will not attract a mentally healthy mate which can add a lot of stress and drama and can end up being a huge set back.

Let me know where you're at with withdrawal - I have a lot of experience with benzos. I was in Xanax daily as prescribed for 10 years. My rehab cut me off cold turkey and I went through a couple of years of hell. I had horrible anxiety and was not very cognitively functional, so it took a while before I could go back to work. I tried a couple of times to go back to work to early and it didn't end well. I also have several tips and tricks for dealing with the withdrawal - particularly the anxiety piece.

This is good advice. Moreaux knows her stuff.

I am going through a similar situation. Still in PAWS from methadone and benzos. It was almost surreal when I ventured out and first started working. I was at a half wayhouse and I experienced the exact same fog you speak of OP. My first jobs were sales. I eventually got lucky and landed a job building the new Speadway in Daytona. It was very cathartic and humbling. I felt like I was really part of something and it filled me with pride. Plus I got to feel like a badass slinging and bolting all the steel, while they ran races right in front of us working. We could go up to the top floor and watch the sunrise over the ocean.

I don't know exactly, what my point is because I am still going through the same stuff but I guess what I would advice is finding a job with low stress and that is fullfilling.

 

[dragonix]

Hardest thing for me right now. Cannot bring myself to go into this job withdrawaling so I use at work now daily. Cannot even apply to new jobs no energy basically.

Thankfully my withdrawaling is minimal compared to some drugs I have hope I might be able to stop before Xmas cause the way I use I am not sure I will survive this employer until then. Also would just sit on unemployment getting high the rest of the winter like I did last year as does the manager who has been there twenty odd years.

I will not die in peace accepting govt aid but I might die if I don't soon muster the courage to face these WDs and I know I cannot not look for work good with an addiction like this if I keep it active. WD or not got to force myself to find new work as I cannot work with people offering to get me high oh the joys of the rat race.

To be fair they didn't outright offer me it I brought up growing mushrooms and told them about the San Pedro family of cacti which pretty much opened the door to making friends with these heads and for me cannabis is a gateway drug but I can't say they pushed me through the gate I would weasel my way back in with or without them.

I would imagine society blames the addict more than the pusher.

It's not your fault but it is our responsibility what we do from here.

 

[dragonix]

If you aren't being sustained financially right now, I'd throw the job at the top of the list.

If you are, just work on healing. Pretty sure that was only 3 things!!

I read a book by an Asian doctor on addiction he made it clear holding a job is crucial for an addict in recovery. Forget the title.

So while I am using and blame work for it I know I cannot quit the job before securing another. Another could trigger me worse for all I know.