Took lsd for the 1st time 4 days ago. Still feel very anxious

[frankster101]

Hello. I really wasn't planning on making a thread on this, as I didn't want to make it a big deal, but now I feel like it will at the very least be very therapeutic.

So 4 days ago, I took exactly 125ug of Acid by myself in my room at night time (I'm 18 btw). The next few hours were really intense to say the least. I would even go as far as to say even traumatic. I will post my trip report at the very end, but you don't have to read it to understand the situation.

After I began to baseline, around 6:50am I felt soo much better. I thought I would be trap in there forever, and coming back from it gave a momentary happiness. However as the day went on, I realized that I have an anxiousness that I've only felt a few times before. Very similar to what I felt during the come up of the trip actually. So I checked the online forums of those who had similar experience, and a lot of folks say that it will fade away in days/weeks.

It's been 4 days now, and it is still here. It seems to go away when I distract myself with videos, or when I am around/talking to other people, but when I am by myself it re emerges. This also includes when I go to sleep at night, and wake up in the morning.

I have only taken weed a handful of times and other than that, haven't dabbled with any other forms of drugs (never got drunk off of alcohol or anything). I want to believe that it will go away with time, but when you're knee deep in anxiety, it's kind of hard to see it that way. I guess that's what anxiety is to begin with.
Really I'm just looking for some reassurance.... Someone who's been through a similar or worse situation and came out fine. Also maybe some tips on how to speed this up. I won't be able to go out for a bit so talking to people like I did before might only be possible on certain days. I was thinking of just watching tv series/anime all day (something I havent done for years) until I'm back to normal. I have a month or 2 of free time/break so I dont mind taking as much time as I need to get back on my feet.

I had a slightly similar experience with a weed edibles before. I had a somewhat traumatic experience/bad trip (that only lasted no more than 20 minutes). I felt kind of like I do now, but that feeling of anxiety went away after 2 days.

I'm guessing since I was tripping on lsd for 12 hours straight, the lingering after affects are a bit longer. I have no idea.

Anyways that's about it. Oh, I'm also pretty confident that what I took wasn't RC. There was no taste whatsoever, and the vendor I got it from is very reliable. Like everything in life, you can't be 100% sure, but let's just assume what I took was just 125ug of some pretty strong lsd.

Trip report (optional. It's pretty long): http://pastebin.com/JPkhuqDM

Please, if anyone has any advice at all, feel free to reply.


Also, no hate to lsd in particular. I'm not gonna bash on the drug, especially since no one but myself put the blotter in my mouth. With that being said, I plan on staying away from LSD, Weed, and drugs in general until im in the right mind space. And even after that, I'll wait a bit longer just for good measures.

 

[frankster101]

Looking more into the Forum, I notice there's a lot of these kind of threads. I'm sure there might be some who are tired of seeing them, but I really do empathize with those who had these kind of intense experiences now. Peace and love to all!

 

[Clocktower]

First, did you reagent test this LSD? It's important to do so, since it's the only way to gain some certainty about what drugs you take. Unfortunately, "I'm pretty sure it was real LSD" isn't enough for us to give you much reliable advice.

Second, unless you laid those blotters yourself very accurately, you can't be sure that your dose was "exactly" 125 mcg. Be aware that advertised doses are imprecise.

In the end, this is not too unusual. You will probably feel better if you abstain from drug use for a while. Personally, I think 18 is a little too young for LSD anyway. You'll thank yourself later if you keep drug use to a minimum until you're in your 20's.

 

[frankster101]

Thanks for the output. And after this experience I definitely do agree that I was not ready for this trip. But It's happened. Now I just want to move past it. wondering if that means to find a way to redirect my thoughts from the anxiety, which seemed to help short term so far

 

[One Thousand Words]

Be prepared to accept that you may never be ready to trip. Why you had a bad experience is varied. The wrong setting under pressure of being discovered by your parents (I assume) is likely, or you may just not have the type of personality to be compatible with psychedelics. It's better to discover this now than push headlong into a downward spiral.

Will you recover? Most likely yes. It's hard to predict, some take a few days, others a few weeks and some many months. You may be fine for weeks then confront something that triggers you, and you experience this anxiety again. It's important to give your brain a break. No drugs or alcohol, including weed, and eat, sleep and exercise. This will cure the majority of post traumatic stress. Clock watching will not help you. If it persists longer than a few weeks you may want to seek advise from a doctor, particularly if you start having dark and or suicidal thoughts.

 

[frankster101]

To tell you the truth, I wouldn't even mind if I never take any psychedelics until the day I die. I remember during the trip itself thinking that, even though it was really intense and almost un bearable, at least now I know to stay away from these kind of things (atleast until I'm more mentally mature). Funny thing too, I also got some DMT which came in 2 days later but could have just as easilly been in my hands way before I got lsd. I'm just glad I knew now, because who knows how things would have turned out had I taken the DMT first....

 

[CrypticArc]

Personally, I think 18 is a little too young for LSD anyway. You'll thank yourself later if you keep drug use to a minimum until you're in your 20's.

Why do you say that? LSD saved my life when I was 15.

 

[manboychef]

I have had three extremely traumatic trips. It takes a while to be the same again afterwards. Some things will never be the same.

I have to agree with crypticarc though. Before the bad trips, it gave me a lot of insight into why I felt the way I did throughout my teenage years.

Eat well, sleep, and find something you love doing to occupy your time, and it slowly gets better. Also, feel blessed you did not end up in the psych ward.

good luck.

 

[frankster101]

Thanks for your output, manboychef. Today, I came to terms with the things in my life I was trying to push away (my parents, work, etc). I just came back from having a long and heartfelt conversation with my mom.
Knowing who I am, and how stubborn I can get, I'm literally astonished at how fast it took me to forgive and face those life fears. It reminds me of the trip itself, where I was trying to run away from it and the situation kept getting worse, but the moment I just let go, it stopped becoming fearful. Traumatic? Yup. Crazy? Hell yeah. But not as hopeless as I was during the comeup.

I still dont feel like myself, and my motivation is still unstable ( there are flickers of moments where it comes back, but it's not there for long and I still get anxiety most of the day).

I have had three extremely traumatic trips. It takes a while to be the same again afterwards. Some things will never be the same.

Did the anxiety go away atleast? Im fine with changing, as that is inevitable. But I could definitely do without the lingering angst in the pit of my stomach.

Also to anyone reading this and is in a similar experience, I plan on keeping this thread updated until Im out of the funk.

 

[frankster101]

Hey guys. Just wanted to update that I feel almost/ pretty much back to normal. What I did was pretty much have long mundane conversations with my dad/brother/friends. That really grounded me back to normal. I can still feel the impression of anxiety, but it's a lot weaker. Who knows how tomorrow will turn out, but now I know from personal experience that it will fade eventually.

Thanks everyone for the advice given. I've seen in a lot of posts with these kind of topics, the OP almost never writes a conclusion to their situation, so you never know how it turned out for them. So I definitely plan on properly concluding this thread once the anxiety is completely gone, so if anyone else is going through a similar situation, they can relate a be reassured!

 

[CrypticArc]

Great to hear. Remember, no matter what happens on acid, 99.9% of the time you're gonna be back to normal (maybe even better than normal) very soon.

 

[manboychef]

Great to hear. Remember, no matter what happens on acid, 99.9% of the time you're gonna be back to normal (maybe even better than normal) very soon.

This is very true. The only reason that my anxiety persisted is because I have an anxiety disorder (panic disorder, and OCD, coupled with major depressive disorder).

What has helped me to feel better is medication, and talk therapy.

It seems like you are doing the talk therapy by talking to your family and friends, however, if you are still feeling anxious, your trip might have brought up some underlying disorder. Just check with your GP and they can give you a little better information as I cannot diagnose you over the computer.

good luck, and I am glad you are doing well. As long as you learned something about yourself or life, it cannot be considered a bad trip, only a difficult one.

 

[neurotic]

everything is gonna be okay, there's no need to precipitate yourself... you're not overreacting. bad trips can be extremely traumatizing and surely enough leave you anxious or with panic attacks for a while after.

i too had one bad trip (on shrooms though) where i also thought "this is it. i'm never coming down, i'm crazy forever", and when i came down holy shit what a relief it was. when we're anxious we can't really see things right, and the anxious mind comes up with the most terrifying shit... don't listen to your anxious mind. when you're anxious and think that you're not gonna feel 100% again ever, remember that you thought that when you were tripping too, and you were wrong...

life is long enough for this trip to stop affecting you.

 

[frankster101]

everything is gonna be okay, there's no need to precipitate yourself... you're not overreacting. bad trips can be extremely traumatizing and surely enough leave you anxious or with panic attacks for a while after.

i too had one bad trip (on shrooms though) where i also thought "this is it. i'm never coming down, i'm crazy forever", and when i came down holy shit what a relief it was. when we're anxious we can't really see things right, and the anxious mind comes up with the most terrifying shit... don't listen to your anxious mind. when you're anxious and think that you're not gonna feel 100% again ever, remember that you thought that when you were tripping too, and you were wrong...

life is long enough for this trip to stop affecting you.

I am still amazed how our thought process can be affected so drastically by our mood(like anxiety). Even more astonished on how much more it's altered under LSD. I was very surprised going into this for the first time tripping, so I was all over the place, but if I ever do try it again, I can definitely see the spiritual/creative use of having an altered thought process that LSD so easily provides.
ATM, the anxiety seems to only come when I wake up, and it's ever so slight. Something I'm able to redirect into positive energy. Also another thing I try to do is to not associate who I am with the anxiety. I just see is as feeling that will come and go. And with that, I also learned to do the same thing with other emotions as well. Very helpful for not making rash decisions when I'm expressing strong emotions.

 

[frankster101]

This is very true. The only reason that my anxiety persisted is because I have an anxiety disorder (panic disorder, and OCD, coupled with major depressive disorder).

What has helped me to feel better is medication, and talk therapy.

It seems like you are doing the talk therapy by talking to your family and friends, however, if you are still feeling anxious, your trip might have brought up some underlying disorder. Just check with your GP and they can give you a little better information as I cannot diagnose you over the computer.

good luck, and I am glad you are doing well. As long as you learned something about yourself or life, it cannot be considered a bad trip, only a difficult one.

Again thanks for the lovely output.

 

[nalvan]

Hey Frankster, if you been reading other threads about this, you probably read mine, or not. I had the same problem after tripping 4 times (with only one week between each trip, thats where i fucked up) but my situation was worst because i did 25i nbome which is shit. Anyway i had an anxiety who lasted for like 1 and a half months, but guess what its not around anymore . So yea, im telling you this because i've been where you are and i know how conforting words like this could be. As they said, dont listen to your anxious mind, when i had anxiety i thought i had Anemia.. yea.. thats how fucked up i was. Just try to take a walk everyday, is good for exercising and to think (i know you have to distract yourself, but dont do it so much to escape from problems) it really calms you down. Eat well also. I was so scared that i went to a friend's mom who is a psychiatrist, i did a lot of exams and im completly fine, so if you're worried about your health, dont be. Good look buddy

 

[Clocktower]

Why do you say that? LSD saved my life when I was 15.

Your experience is your own, but ample research has demonstrated that the risk of harm from psychedelics and other drugs is much greater for teens, whose brains are not yet fully developed.

 

[frankster101]

Hey everyone. Just wanted to post a (most likely) last update on my situation. The anxiety I was feeling days after my trip is completely gone.

The things I did to help were:

-took some vitamins (D and C )

-The days when I couldn't sleep, I took 15 mg of melatonin and it worked like a charm. I only used it twice, and the only side effect was that it affected my circadian rhythm a bit (I felt sleepy at random times of the day). I heard somewhere (cant remember where) that it's best to use it every OTHER day. It's a supplement btw and can be bought pretty cheaply at cvs, and pretty much any super market.

-Oddly enough, reading about others going through the same exact situation really helped me out a lot. Maybe it was because of the advice that others posted to the OP. Maybe it was because of the ability to relate to them and knowing that dozens of people have been through the same stuff. Maybe it was even because I can read there story and think "Wow, They've got it A LOT worse than me" (and it's more helpful when I read a post of someone who's been through something MORE traumatic, and then seeing them get over it). I don't know the exact reason, but reading them is very therapeutic.

-(This only applies the few days after the trip) I pretty much just tried to pamper/distract myself from focusing all my energy on remembering and deeply analyzing the trip. What I did was watch anime, listened to podcasts, Talked to friends and family (very VERY helpful), and found things to do that required all of my energy. I want to note that these things only worked as a "quick fix" and didn't really get rid of the anxiety for longer than 6-8 hours.

*This I believe is the main thing that helped get rid of the anxiety. However, it's something that, for me, was very hard to face or to come to terms with: It was myself. I had to first face myself, insecurities and all. I had to first accept who I was, where I was in my life, and how I behaved. It sucked. No, it REALLY SUCKED! But I realized that I couldn't move forward until I saw myself for who I am. Not for who I was in the past. Not for who I will become in the future. But who I am now.

After all that, after feeling all the feelings and whatnot, I decided to choose to be happy. I was sick and tired of feeling unmotivated and low. So step by step, I started changing my mindset from a negative perspective, to a slightly positive one. And I did that over and over (mentally) until I started feeling energized. Than I went to sleep.

Just woke up, and this was one of the best mornings I had all week. No where near better than what I know I could reach, but I'm getting There.

I think all and all the things I came up with was just me finally integrating the experience into my life. I'm sure not everyone will be able to relate to this, but hopefully this could be helpful to at least one person.

And Thank you for everyone who wrote to me words of encouragement and love. You guys don't know how much it helped me. At one point, I was seriously thinking that I will be in what felt like a "limbo" kind of mindset. It was a very morbid way of thinking of the world. And I've also learned that it was also a very Valid way of looking at the world.... But it wasn't how I wanted to continue to look at it. Which also made me learn that your mindset and state of being really does effect what seems "real" to you. When I was very anxious, there were some thoughts that felt so real (and so morbid) I just couldn't even begin to see it any other way.
But then when I get into a more positive mindset, the exact opposite will happen. The mind is a very interesting thing.

To conclude, I want to say that now, looking at it from a more positive point of view, that I am extremely thankful to have gone through all of this at this point of my life. I fear that had I not, I probably would have been carrying a lot of baggage that I wouldn't have even known was on me!!
Well that's all I can think of writing so I think I'll end it here. I will also send some links that was very helpful. But all and all, for anyone who might be going through similar situation, just remember that the thoughts that you get when you are feeling anxiety are not who YOU are.

Links
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/569072102890616750/

https://drugs-forum.com/forum/showwiki.php?title=The_psychedelic_crisis:_bad_trip#After_a_bad_trip


Update:One last thing to note. MUSIC. Oh my god, todays the first day I was able to actually enjoy my music. After the trip, the songs on my playlist were simply rubbing me the wrong way. Most likely because I was listening to them during the trip and the way they morphed bended made me a little afraid every time I listened to it. But thankfully now I can jam to it and not feel anything! Praise the sun!! Lesson learned, If I trip again, I'll stay away from any of my personal songs if the trip begins taking a turn for the worse.

 

[Help101]

Hi there! I had a very similar experience and I promise you will be okay! I was a regular weed smoker for 3 years before I took lsd and my trip was very traumatic for me. Getting on a normal sleep schedule and focusing on what makes you happy and your future goals will really help to speed up the process of recovery! Try taking melatonin (a natural sleep aid) that will help you get a rested night sleep and after about a week that should help you feel so much better. Please message me if you have any questions or just need someone to talk to

 

[Cudi]

read about my traumatic trip report from last october. its a long one and i thought i would never recover, but here i am a year later and im all good. i was experiencing PTSD like symptoms for a couple months after the trip and i couldnt smoke pot or it would give me bad flashbacks. i still have to be careful with how much i smoke because that dark part of my mind still exists, and too much THC brings that part of my mind out of the abyss. you will be fine, stay away from alcohol and weed for a while. exercise and do things that interest you.