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Tinder

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psytaco

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 20, 2005
Messages
1,673
So Tinder is pretty popular in Australia at the moment and I imagine it is just as popular in other parts of the world too.

I have been on it for a little bit under 2 weeks and have been on a date and was supposed to go one tonight (with another girl) but I had to cancel because something came up. So far, I am pretty impressed with the App. The most surprising thing has been that most of the women on there are quite attractive, compared to other dating sites.

I was wondering what other people's thoughts on it are? If you use it, how do you find it? Worth your time and effort? Have many of you met people from it and gone on many dates?

Also to the girls:

1) What kind of pictures should I put up? I think I am reasonably attractive and do reasonably well if I am at a bar. However, I don't think I photograph that well - any tips on picking photos.
2) I struggle a bit to find conversation starters. Things like 'hi. how are you?' etc. are not often responded too and it can be a bit hard to think of comment to make about someone's pictures. Any suggestions here?
3) I have been aiming to get girls phone numbers fairly quickly and suggest drinks. Do you think this is the best way to go about it, or is it better to chat for a while on tinder first?
 
I have been tinder laid twice.

I hit yes on every single girl without looking and then just say absolutely ridiculous things once they chat it up.

As shallow as it sounds, its a numbers game. She knows it, you know it. Get after it.
 
I too, have been tinder laid twice. However, I never initiate the conversation.

1) I can rarely say no to a guy with a dog. Don't post all group photos where I can't tell which one you are, or anything with ski goggles etc blocking your face. Tinder is essentially hot or not, I need to be able to see your face. Don't worry too much about photographing well. Maybe go through your Facebook profile pictures and pick ones that get the most attention. Tinder pulls from Facebook anyway.

2) I don't have anything to input as far as conversation starters, like I said, I don't initiate. I don't know why, it's just how I play.

3) I like guys who can chat a while without immediately asking for my number. The only two guys I met up with off tinder were chatty and didn't immediately ask me out the first time we talked.
 
Ha. I did a search for 'tinder' and the only thread I could find was the one I started.

I actually met my ex girlfriend on there shortly after making this post. We were together for a year and a half before breaking up.

Anyway, now I am back on it for about 2 or so months. I have met a few cool girls but its reputation for a pick up app isn't so warranted. I'm actually finding it harder to sleep with women on tinder than I did when I went out to nightclubs more. There have been some successes but not as many as I would like. Probably the fact that I meet up with many of them on week nights doesn't help.

Anyway, so I am still finding that I don't seem to match with the same calibre of attractive women that I can pick up or show interest in me when I go out. Does anyone else have this issue or is it likely that I need to improve my photographs? I seem to have really lucked out with my ex as she was gorgeous and it has probably given me high expectations. That said, there are so many hot women on there, yet I don't seem to match much with them and if I do conversation seems to die pretty quickly (the ones that aren't as stunning generally seem to put more effort into conversation).

Also, has anyone else noticed how 'disposable' it sort of makes people. I have been on multiple dates with a few women only to have them just completely ignore my messages afterwards. I can understand this for one date, but after 3? I don't know, maybe I'm just picking the wrong girls. Anyone else noticing this trend? I put it down to tinder giving people a lot of options and I do have been guilty of been finnicky as a result.

Anyone else here use it? Any success stories, funny stories or horror stories you guys want to share?

Tips would also be much appreciated. I am alright on dates but could probably lift my tinder game.
 
Never tried it. I'd imagine it's a sausage party just like most hookup sites/apps/whatever. You know? Those keggers with like 40 dudes and maybe like 6 chicks and only 1-2 of them are actually hot? If you're one of the guys that hooks up with them, it's a fucking blast. If you're the other 99% though, not so much?

Tell me. Is this Tinder?
 
^No you actually get to search only chicks. Its different from other dating apps.

Tinder is nice because there are a lot of hot girls, however it becomes pretty boring since after you've done a match with a girl its quite difficult to start a conversation if you don't have anything in common. Plus even if you manage to start a conversation the girl will very likely not decide to go out with a complete stranger.
 
psytaco said:
3) I have been aiming to get girls phone numbers fairly quickly and suggest drinks. Do you think this is the best way to go about it, or is it better to chat for a while on tinder first?
Click to expand...

Sounds right, the whole idea behind Tinder is it's very fast-paced.. you have a very small window to exhibit yourself through messages before interest is lost; i used it with moderate success when i was in Europe.. i always escalated the conversation quickly to meeting up or drinks, if they weren't interested then i would move on.

I've actually had better success with casual sex on dating websites because there's more information to work with, and less flakiness. I think Tinder is too heavily tied up with personal validation rather then functional use; so you'll match a lot but little will usually result from it.
 
Been on there about 6 months *no shame*. And I've laid atleast 10 chicks off of there and dated a few *again no shame*. It's pretty rad. I used to just swipe right on any girl that looked half decent but as of late I've just been going off the main pic and being very picky, looking for girls that are exactly my type based on looks. Since I've started being more selective I've been getting their numbers about 2/3 of the time. All in all a good app. It attracts the attractive girls because it's 1) trendy right now, 2) they can easily unmatch creeps, and 3) because they get to choose which guys they can talk to! (as opposed to sites like pof where any guy can message them and harrass them).
 
Just dipping my toes back into the online dating scene for the first time since... 2014-ish? (Broke up with partner of 6+ years in January.) It's changed a lot... now, three-quarters of the women have Instagram links as their profile description. Easy "swipe left" decision, anyway. I used to like OK Cupid but it looks like it's changed into something completely different and not terribly compelling. What's worth trying out other than Tinder these days?
 
S.J.B. said:
. What's worth trying out other than Tinder these days?
Click to expand...
Bumble is. The women need to initiate the conversation so you know from the get-go that they are not a scam account and have at least some kind of interest in you.
 
Atomic_Decay said:
Bumble is. The women need to initiate the conversation so you know from the get-go that they are not a scam account and have at least some kind of interest in you.
Click to expand...
Funny, I never had any luck on Bumble. It seemed like most of the women on that app were out of my league. Like with pics of themselves on yachts and shit. I would never get the time of day from a girl like that in a bar, what makes me think I would on an app?

I always had best luck on OK Cupid. At least there were regular girls on it that were somewhat down to earth and with things I could find in common. I did find a gf on POF once a few years ago but she dumped me because she was jealous of previous girls since I was too good in bed. Pfft.
 
I found love three times on OkCupid, one several year girlfriend, a shorter but wonderful relationship turned into friendship, and my current partner and wife with whom i will likely spend my life. I also had two very intense online relationships. I also dated many women via the site over 13 years, sometimes looking for love, sometimes looking for sex, and what I learned was that it is really good to answer the questions to get the match percentage algorithm working correctly. It is important to pay attention to the “importance” level for each question, because it changes the algorithm a lot (you don’t want too much weight on questions like favorite food, because who cares if someone’s favorite food isn’t yours, but politics, sex, life goals and religion could be dealbreakers and thus you should mark their importance accordingly). This will help you sift through the thousands of people on the site in your area, because then you can decide to only talk to people with a 95% match or above, for example. I really appreciate the fact that you can create a very long and detailed profile on OkC, leaving lots of room for verbally expressing oneself, something I like doing and seeing in a partner. Personally I need to be able to have excellent conversations with a partner, so a good sign for me is when we can’t stop chatting online before meeting up. Otherwise I know it will be a bust. Also in general I find the OkCupid population in my country more artsy compared to the below sites, and as a left leaning artist I like being with other left-leaning artsy folk. All this said, it is a shame that OkCupid has become more like tinder recently, making it less and less unique and malleable.

Tinder sucked in my experience. I met no one because I didn’t know who to talk to just based on pictures, and any rare matches ended in very boring non-conversation.

Bumble, at least in my country, was full of normal people, and after one date with a woman working at a consulate, and lots of very dry online conversations (what is your job? What tv shows do you like? Zzz…), I stopped looking.
 
Tested out Tinder, Hinge, Bumble and OK Cupid. Actually, OK Cupid still seems to be superior as it's the only one where you can at least send a message to someone without having to match first.
 
Y'all tinder users got to just experience Grindr for one day. It'll change the way you view straight dating apps. Like all my cis het friends harp on about how tinder us just for sex but do you have a section in it where gay men can state whether they are a top or a bottom so that no one runs into any serious compatibility issues? That is streamline service. And oh the joys of conversation. 'wanna fuck' *dick pic* I am smitten completely.

No, I use tinder for my refined dates. Grindr is for my deplorable sex pest behaviour.
 
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