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The Discuss Your Views on Sex Work or Prostitution Thread

Shadow Cat said:
How so? it was their idea its not like I go around making the offer to women and she was broke. I don't feel bad about it is what it is, ain't my responsibility to keep some chick I barely know out of withdrawals.

Relating to tripping with the the Escort im sure it's gonna be a fun time and the girl lists she does oral, vag and anal in the add so it's not like I'm asking her to do something she is uncomfortable with. I'm really excited honestly the pictures she put up are pretty mindblowing she has the kinda body j-lo has, im a really sucker for big booty girls it drives me wild.
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Hmm, so really, she was manipulating you :O
 
Yeah @Zephyn I am certainly sympathetic to the idea that capitalism causes people to do things they wouldn't normally in order to survive. But at the end of the day it's a job like any other, and if they're not up for it, they can always find a different one.

I guess I just don't view sex as any sort of special or sacred act. Maybe I'm just an emotionally blunted sex addict, but to me, the weirdness and awkardness comes around once feelings start getting thrown around. I hate that cat and mouse timid shit trying to figure out if someone wants you or not. Maybe I would feel differently if people were honest about their feelings. But they're not.

For me, nights with sex workers have been infinitely less of a hassle than regular hookups. No worrying about whether she likes you or if you're acting weird. Because you both know what it is going into it. Here for an hour, get down, say bye. No more, no less. It's just so difficult for me to pretend to have 'feelings' and worrying about their problems and all that shit. I'm giving up on ever finding a good woman, if I find her, great. But in the meantime, I have no interest in stunting like I'm some cool guy or attracting a mate somehow.
 
deficiT said:
Yeah @Zephyn I am certainly sympathetic to the idea that capitalism causes people to do things they wouldn't normally in order to survive. But at the end of the day it's a job like any other, and if they're not up for it, they should try and find a different one.

I guess I just don't view sex as any sort of special or sacred act. Maybe I'm just an emotionally blunted sex addict, but to me, the weirdness and awkardness comes around once feelings start getting thrown around. I hate that cat and mouse timid shit trying to figure out if someone wants you or not. Maybe I would feel differently if people were honest about their feelings. But they're not.

For me, nights with sex workers have been infinitely less of a hassle than regular hookups. No worrying about whether she likes you or if you're acting weird. Because you both know what it is going into it. Here for an hour, get down, say bye. No more, no less. It's just so difficult for me to pretend to have 'feelings' and worrying about their problems and all that shit. I'm giving up on ever finding a good woman, if I find her, great. But in the meantime, I have no interest in stunting like I'm some cool guy or attracting a mate somehow.
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Sure, no judgement, I just hope you aren't trading heroin for sex, thats just grimy ;P as for what you are talkingabout, if it works for you, good, and im sure the people you see appreciate you as a customer rather than some of these assholes
 
deficiT said:
Yeah @Zephyn I am certainly sympathetic to the idea that capitalism causes people to do things they wouldn't normally in order to survive. But at the end of the day it's a job like any other, and if they're not up for it, they can always find a different one.
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I don’t think it is as simple as that for two reasons that have been raised by other posters earlier in the thread.

The first is if someone is a drug addict and/or homeless or possible someone with untreated mental illness and cannot either find or hold down a job.

In countries with weak social security relative to cost or no treatment programs it is easy to see that a woman might do this kind of work to survive or to feed her kids or stave off withdrawal.

Secondly, it is well documented that a large number of sex workers have had traumatic upbringing or experiences (abuse, rape, assault etc) when young that have caused them to de-value themselves in a way that makes them see and experience their body and sex in a very unhealthy way compared to most people.

Absent those experiences it would be unlikely they would consider doing sex work or be able to cope with it.
deficiT said:
I guess I just don't view sex as any sort of special or sacred act. Maybe I'm just an emotionally blunted sex addict, but to me, the weirdness and awkardness comes around once feelings start getting thrown around.
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You don’t have to think that sex is sacred or particularly special to see that sex work is fundamentlly different to other kinds of work. For one, it involves giving up bodily autonomy and frequently being subject to clients who demean and dominate you. That lack of control and position of being used and degraded would be unacceptable in any other job. And that’s before you add in the high potential for rape and violence. I’ve met a number of sex workers who recounted stories of customers not respecting their stated boundaries - for example forcing them to have bareback sex, choking them, or continuing to fuck away if the woman has asked to stop.
deficiT said:
. I hate that cat and mouse timid shit trying to figure out if someone wants you or not. Maybe I would feel differently if people were honest about their feelings. But they're not.
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There is no argument that the availability of sex workers makes life a lot easier if you ae not fussed about love or can’t be fucked investing in relationships. But that’s not evidence that sex work is the same as any other work.
deficiT said:
For me, nights with sex workers have been infinitely less of a hassle than regular hookups. No worrying about whether she likes you or if you're acting weird. Because you both know what it is going into it. Here for an hour, get down, say bye. No more, no less. It's just so difficult for me to pretend to have 'feelings' and worrying about their problems and all that shit. I'm giving up on ever finding a good woman, if I find her, great. But in the meantime, I have no interest in stunting like I'm some cool guy or attracting a mate somehow.
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Atelier3 said:
I don’t think it is as simple as that for two reasons that have been raised by other posters earlier in the thread.

The first is if someone is a drug addict and/or homeless or possible someone with untreated mental illness and cannot either find or hold down a job.

In countries with weak social security relative to cost or no treatment programs it is easy to see that a woman might do this kind of work to survive or to feed her kids or stave off withdrawal.

Secondly, it is well documented that a large number of sex workers have had traumatic upbringing or experiences (abuse, rape, assault etc) when young that have caused them to de-value themselves in a way that makes them see and experience their body and sex in a very unhealthy way compared to most people.

Absent those experiences it would be unlikely they would consider doing sex work or be able to cope with it.


You don’t have to think that sex is sacred or particularly special to see that sex work is fundamentlly different to other kinds of work. For one, it involves giving up bodily autonomy and frequently being subject to clients who demean and dominate you. That lack of control and position of being used and degraded would be unacceptable in any other job. And that’s before you add in the high potential for rape and violence. I’ve met a number of sex workers who recounted stories of customers not respecting their stated boundaries - for example forcing them to have bareback sex, choking them, or continuing to fuck away if the woman has asked to stop.


There is no argument that the availability of sex workers makes life a lot easier if you ae not fussed about love or can’t be fucked investing in relationships. But that’s not evidence that sex work is the same as any other work.
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I can't even read this right now. Glanced over the whole thing. Tomorrow.
 
People who work in this industry, female and male both get degraded with the work they do and with what clients wants. I have seen what they go through and also exp it myself being an escort to wealthy woman. So my view is that they deserve respect like just any other worker or employee in any other industry. A service is provided for a certain amount of money that is agreed upon from the get go and also the rules that apply to this specific business arrangement, cause all it is at the end of the day is a business agreement/service.

But like i said before, this is a dbl edged sword. Some are there willingly and some are not and that's where the difference comes into play or at least for me.

This is all just my personal pov.

Regards
CoffeeShroom
 
JessFR said:
I notice several people come up with ideas like legalizing prostitution and regulating it so prostitutes for instance have to get std tests.

But I never hear anything about how they expect that to work.

Like, when I was involved in sex work on a part time basis it was at the street level. I did it as needed to fund my heroin habit.

I wouldn't have had time to get tested to renew my license to do sex work.

So say I don't. What happens then if I'm caught?

You can't enforce this stuff without getting back into punishing the most vulnerable.

I find a lot of suggestions to be well intended but not very practical when you really start looking at it.
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Agreed, we can’t have the government ending up with autonomy over a persons body like it’s a commodity.

Where I am from they haven’t legalised it, but instead chose to decriminalise prostitution.
This is supposed to stop the more dangerous activities associated with this kind of work and enable workers to seek health care with hopes to get them off the street.
I wouldn’t say they’ve got it all figured out just yet because the street workers near me are still everywhere and dropping like flies from years of self harm.

I’m sure the govs working on tying up the lose ends, not just creating policy for votes. 🤔
 
sigmond said:
I have mixed feelings about sex work and lean against supporting it for a number of reasons. The main issue I have is human trafficking (sex slavery) but also a lot of sex workers would be doing something different if they weren't addicted to drugs. Furthermore, some of the girls were traumatized by a sexual assault at a young age and are now unconsciously reenacting the trauma. I read traumatized people, who haven't been able to fully process and accept what happened to them, often return to the people, places, and things that caused the initial trauma.

I know of a girl who is a sex worker and seems to enjoy the work for the most part but I also realized she has the emotional maturity of a teenager. I get the feeling she is bouncing from man to man trying to please them in the same way she probably pleased some sex-abuser who raped her at a young age.

Which is another thing that bothers me about sex work; just because the girls are adult age doesn't mean they have matured to the extent that would be considered normal. A lot of those girls are basically children in adult bodies.

However, under certain circumstances (consenting, mature, adults) its probably not harmful but actually beneficial.

(minor edits/slightly better English)
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I feel the same way, someone winds up getting trafficked, forced into doing sex acts they do not want to do or consent to doing, robbed/ripped off, psychologically damaged, etc. This happens in countries where prostitution or 'sex work' is completely legal, decriminised, or legal in certain designated areas of a city.

Also ALL of the former prostitutes I know or have met, have told me how being a prostitute even if it was for a short period of time, was by far the worst 'job' they ever had done for 'work'.
 
Mr. Krinkle said:
Maybe decriminalize it first and go from there?

regardless of what you're doing with that money, it's still a job - isn't it? i don't ask anybody what they're doing with their paycheck - why should prostitution be any different?

ive had a lousy BJ before so there's definitely an art to the profession....and i don't want the cracked out hooker either - i'd like to see the menu plz =D
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Many prostitutes use condoms and/or dental dams for oral sex.

Nobody except latex fetishists likes tasting latex or other materials condoms are made out of-a friend loved lamb intestine ones and all I thought was how disgusting it is and it does not protect against AIDS or HIV-but I am not sure why people pay prostitutes to give them oral with latex barriers? Jerking off alone feels better but there is no human contact or intimacy.

There are prostitutes that go without barriers for more €£$ Or with select clients during oral sex, and anal/vaginal sex.
 
sigmond said:
I have mixed feelings about sex work and lean against supporting it for a number of reasons. The main issue I have is human trafficking (sex slavery) but also a lot of sex workers would be doing something different if they weren't addicted to drugs. Furthermore, some of the girls were traumatized by a sexual assault at a young age and are now unconsciously reenacting the trauma. I read traumatized people who haven't been able to fully process and accept what happened to them, often return to the people, places, and things that caused the initial trauma.

I know of a girl who is a sex worker and seems to enjoy the work for the most part but I also realized she has the emotional maturity of a teenager. I get the feeling she is bouncing from man to man trying to please them in the same way she probably pleased some sex-abuser who raped her at a young age.

Which is another thing that bothers me about sex work. Just because the girls are adult age doesn't mean they have matured to the extent that would be considered normal. A lot of those girls are basically children in adult bodies.

However, under certain circumstances (consenting, mature adults) its probably not harmful and at times beneficial.

(minor edits/slightly better English)
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You make a lot of assumptions. True some sex workers were sexually abused when younger and many are in drugs, however, the majority are just women who have sex for money instead of having sex for a night out and dinner. Same result in the end. My opinion of course. But I have hired sex workers 100s of times and got to know them instead of making assumptions.
 
The Wizard of the Creek said:
Hired to get to know them, but no sex? If so… you are truly an albatross.
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It’s not at all that unusual. Journalistic interviews with sex workers in multiple countries reveal that men often pay for their time for company rather than sex. Some guys only want company and never request sex or even nudity. Sometimes sex workers don’t actually like these kind of clients because they don’t like their work to be associated with any kind of intimacy. Others think those kind of clients are quite nice. It’s a diverse world out there.

Personally, in the past I have paid for sex workers to have someone to get high with, which has sometimes then involved sex. But just as often it’s about having non-judgemental company while getting high. Mainly because I don’t know any very non-judgemental women who like getting as high as I do and in life in general I prefer to company of women to men.
 
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