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Recovery The 2024 Recovery Thread

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jasperkent said:
Absolutely.

I've been a daily smoker since 14 as well.
Fifty years. That's a lot of reinforcement.

I've kicked addictions to alcohol, benzos, cocaine, meth, opioids, and combinations thereof. But I've ALWAYS smoked cigs.

I'm still using nicotine but I only miss cigarettes 3 or 4 times a day-- with my first cup of coffee in the morning (a ritual I  adored) and after meals.

So far so good.
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that’s my ritual as well, take my gabapentin, stick my subs under my tongue, dissolve - then coffee & my first dart of the day in the bath tub 😆 it’s a nearly spiritually ingrained ritual at this point.


i will be moving to a vape though, i like this one shop down the road who makes their own juices, and their 6mg fruit loops is soooo good. i just gotta save the money since vapes are kinda pricey
 
it’s been 14 years of smoking for me, as i’m 28 now. i do plan to switch to something like zyn or a good vape in the next 6 months.

goals as of now are : finish my album, buy new clothes since all of mine have burn holes in them, quit smoking cigs, and fix my teeth
 
tokayeahok said:
i will be moving to a vape though
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I get that this at first looks like a legitimate replacement option I just wonder how much more or less damaging it could be to our lungs than regular smoke (which is also damaging).
I mean high-temp oil vapor compared....
Best to ya on this.
J
 
Lil'LinaptkSix said:
I get that this at first looks like a legitimate replacement option I just wonder how much more or less damaging it could be to our lungs than regular smoke (which is also damaging).
I mean high-temp oil vapor compared....
Best to ya on this.
J
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i’ve also been thinking about this as well. the effects it’ll have on lung capacity and if i’ll actually even improve 🥺
 
Vaping is lit ! I can really vouch for Uwell brand mods, pods and coils. A bit more expensive than build-your-own hardware but super flavour and flow. If you can get juice with nicotine already in it that's awesome, otherwise it's not too hard to spike the liquid with nicotine :)
 
If you need any advice for hardware etc feel free to PM me :) Honestly, it's saved me heaps of $ and my lungs etc. Haven't had a smoke for about 12 months now. Not even a social smoke.
 
I'd start a bit higher than 6mg/ml but if that's the only one you can get (I remember you smoke 4-5?) it should be alright :)
 
thatmf said:
I'd start a bit higher than 6mg/ml but if that's the only one you can get (I remember you smoke 4-5?) it should be alright :)
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I smoke a pack of cigs a day but i’m also a compulsive smoker so like - chain smoking, especially in the car or writing music. So i don’t wanna go too high in nicotine bc i’ll be hitting that thing a LOT. LMAO. Unless i’ll be okay compulsively hitting 6mg consistently.
 
good morning guys! good day here as usual. finished two remixes yesterday, talked to family and friends, went on a walk, did a lot of yard work, just a solid day overall. my sleep is really nice and i’ve settled around 10-12mg of suboxone a day. sleeping 8 1/2 hours now!

gunna write more music today, about to get out of my morning bath once i finish coffee and go for my walk :)
have a good day guys
 
Hope y'all are good :D I'm watching a documentary about meth. Apparently a lot of it is cut with heroin to make it physically addictive? Would make some sense looking back...Also 12 months clean :gun:
 
thatmf said:
I'm watching a documentary about meth. Apparently a lot of it is cut with heroin to make it physically addictive? Would make some sense looking back...
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That makes zero sense.
1. Meth is plenty addictive anyway
2. Heroin is much more expensive than meth
3. They are 2 completely different highs. If I started nodding out on meth I'd be pissed off and demanding a refund.
 
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Oh Now I did it. And I will never be able to apologize enough to the whole world and the Universe. I was going psychotic because I couldn't sleep for a days in a row and my head hurt so bad like a Cluster Headache. I ended up being taken to the hospital. It was snowing too and mucked up and I couldn't even make it on my own anymore at that point.

It hurt so bad and is too unreal to try to explain. Some people video tape theirs lol. To prove it or to see what is happening to them.

Reveal :


I couldn't do it by myself this time. But if it ever happens again I am going to just make a really dark room now somehow and just try to last it out.

I got to the hospital and they shot me up with Dilaudid and Haldol.

I really owe an apology to my dog. I had people follow me up to the hospital. My dog had gotten out and ran in the direction of the cars. My mom saw the dog and tried to go get her. Some guy finally saw and helped her get the dog up into her vehicle LIke miles away she ran. Then my mom couldn't get any clothes of mine to try to lure the dog with my .. scent.. so the dog went and sat by the tire of my car and wouldn't leave. So my mom went in my car to see if there was a jacket (not a straight one) or some kind of scent and the dog jumped in the car and refused to get out and would hide if anyone tried. So doggie sat and waited until I got back all frieked out and then she got out and did cartwheels because she was so happy to see me and that I lived and all.

I was still messed up for days after the shots. And then, of course, it gets even worse. But the dog and me are fine now and we are together. And I feel so horrible that I had to inconvenience everybody and had to have emergency attention (and it was embarrassing to me anyway) because of my psychotic headache and I especially feel bad for my dog too.

I had always taught her to follow and to stay close . . . . but Duh I never anticipated or stopped to wonder that I should have possibly taught her and helped her to learn how to Sit Stay and Wait. But I had already assumed that she had known all of that stuff. And it seemed like she knew how to wait. And she has soo much patients like a little warrior.

I feel bad that I could have hurt her too. Or maybe I did hurt her too because she could have got hit by a car out looking for me. Or caught in a goat head patch and bit by rattlesnakes or a yoti..

And now the planet suffers and psychosis lives on I guess. But worse than that is that something is wrong . . . very wrong with my head. Jikes !!!!!!

And I don't even know what it is yet really, but there is no way to fall asleep from one of those head assaults. So is it from not being able to sleep or are you not able to sleep because of the attack!! That is possibly some kind of flare up from something. But I needed help and I couldn't sleep on my own. They treated me and so I left early too but that's another situ. also. Like vertigo and a virus and of course, drugs.

But the only thing I am taking now is the antihistamine for the stuffy head and runny nose vertigo and virus. Thank you drugs. Right. I like them.

Oh yes !! And please don't do drugs. Because this is how you will suffer and that you might and can suffer from taking too many drugs or just from drugs itself. And you may just have to suffer one way or another for each and every day. Or am I going to have to take drugs because I took drugs !

But no really I have to stop being depressed too. I really don't even feel depressed because I feel like if I just feel bad and depressed all of the time my survival is going to depend on it.

I feel bad and I hurt.

I hope I never ever have to look at another f'n hospital again. But I know how that is gonna go, I'm sure. I hate that place. I swear I will never go back.
 
@kiely

I knew something was up but didn't want to push it. At least your dog who loves you heaps is alright as well! And sometimes it's better to get help when you're in those kind of states before you do something stupid. Sorry to hear though. Up and atom
 
thatmf said:
@kiely

I knew something was up but didn't want to push it. At least your dog who loves you heaps is alright as well! And sometimes it's better to get help when you're in those kind of states before you do something stupid. Sorry to hear though. Up and atom
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She does love me. <3 Thank you for knowing that. Stay awesome. Thank you for all of your good awareness and everything. And kindness. That was Nice !
:)
 
i mustve missed any posts you made in that state of mind, and i’m glad because that’s not who you are kiely. these things happen and what’s important is that you’re SAFE and OKAY.


you’re going to be just fine buddy xo
 
I can finally walk properly after a good, over a week long. I had to shuffle across the rooms. Not like the scoots when you have to take long scooots to the shitcloset. jk. That was terrible. But little shuffles teeny weeny shuffles like insane ones. Finally my gait cleared up but I thought it was going to be a thing for a while there. Sad sad times sometimes.

I got hit hard with the liquid dilaudid but the gearny was really kind of rough too and everything. I feel abused but I was just having a rough time. They mixed meds and I was in orbit but under the care of medical assistance, too.

It was sad though when I thought I was going to shuffle around forever and just didn't care. Thank you all for such caring kindness.

We really always appreciate that understanding so muches.

ty ❤️‍🔥
I can't remember if I have been walking since. But I think I have. Like outside and in the rain and with the dogs. 🐶

Take Care everybody. I just had the little scoots. No liked it !!!!
 
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