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Taking Perivian torch to gain an understanding of my heroin addiction.....

somnilicious said:
I don't really want that much introspection. ... You say empathogenic that sounds kinda what I am looking for.
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They're one and the same. Empathy for yourself, also goes under the psychobabble term 'entactogenesis'.

Alone or close friend is something personal. Only with a close friend if they're someone you can talk to about anything without them being distracting or worse yet 'why are you saying this' or 'I don't want to talk about this'.

For deep down therapy I always went for solo trips, but that's such a variable thing from person to person.
 
Thanks Pepper I really appreciate the time you have taken to help me out. I guess I always just understood empathogenic to mean that you will have empathy for others and for the outside world. I always wallow in my feelings. I am kinda a selfish bastard that way.
 
No problem man. :)

What you said also applies. Empathogens/entactogens bring empathy for yourself and for others. MDMA is the 'archetypal' empathogen/entactogen. It breeds empathy for others which is why it's used so socially and is such a 'lovey' experience, but that same thing applies to yourself.

It's not selfish or 'wallowing' it's just coming to terms with parts of you that you haven't thought about or felt for in a while. I see where the selfish connotation can come from, but if that type of thing was the case, all psychotherapy would be considered selfish.
 
Mescaline is extremely psychedelic and can be overwhelming but I find it less of a mind fuck than LSD and of course mushrooms. Mescaline is more spiritual than LSD but similar in lucidity. It seem to me that you can do more healing work with mescaline than you could with acid. Out of all the classics psilocybin may be what you are looking for, It does however have a lot of mind fuck. You must remember this type of healing is not a free ride. You got to pay the piper somehow. The whole reason it will help is quite franky it will fucking horrify you. When one is so deep in the throws of addiction one doesn't see the damage they are doing. That's why they are able to continue on the path. Well they may see it but they are numbed out and jaded. So you cant expect healing work to not come with some mindfuck/negative thoughts and feelings. Its part of the purge. Think of vomiting, it sucks when its happening but when its over you feel a ton better.

Something interesting happened with my last acid trip a few months back. When I came off it , I forgot my desire to drink. It was just gone. POOF. I didn't intend for it to happen but it did. I have been a daily boozer(after work) of a 12 back or so a night for almost two decades. I havnt had a drop since my trip...well actually I had a total of a few beers and was completely put off by them ....I tried to drink for a few social situations not to feed my personal desires...My addiction disappeared after this acid trip. I know the potential is there with psychedelics.... and this contradicts my saying that this type of medicinal use has to be painful. I suppose it doesn't always :)
 
I know you said no ibogaine, but I was addicted to opiates for 10 years (not heroin though I have been addicted to heroin twice). I tripped a lot throughout that, sometimes with the intention of getting insight into my addiction. The behavior never changed and it got worse and worse. Recently I did an ibogaine flood dose and the transformative power of it has been so startling and amazing. For the first time I am off opiates and really happy about it. I'm also doing the work like going to counseling, eating right and working out (all of this after the ibogaine). Feels like a lot of things came together in my head. The way it works is totally different from other psychedelics, it's more of a dream vision quest that for me seemed really random until afterwards. Of course the commitment with ibogaine is a lot more because the flood dose lasts super strong for 3 days and then there is a reintegration period. I did it at home but it's hard for me to recommend doing that as a lot could have gone wrong (I was dreaming while awake on the 3rd day, and straight up immobilized for the first 2 days. That 3rd day I thought I was with it but I was not, whatsoever, ie, I didn't even realize I was dreaming while awake with only brief periods of lucidity). It was an amazing experience though, one of the least frightening psychedelic experiences I've had and also one of the best feeling.
 
Xorkoth, congrats on your conquering the addiction. May I ask on a side note, if Ibogaine has any traditional psychedelic headspace/aspects at all? Is it the similar tripiness to LSD or Mescaline? Do you get the patterns, CEVs, tracers? If not I wonder why its still called a psychedelic and not something like a deleriant?
 
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