"Death to death"
To write something down is much easier to do than doing said written something. To even write that something is harder than thinking it, which is naturally harder than not even thinking it to begin with. Is this my ultimate goal? To do absolutely nothing? I am pulled toward this goal more often than finding motivation, and suicide seems to be the solution to this goal because in death, there is nothing. However, some part of me won't pull the trigger, because the knowledge of what could have been, and that I still have a chance to find out. I put the safety back on and remove the rifle out from under my jaw. Am I good enough for this world? Should I be allowed to live? Can I actually change? At least for now I can think of these things and that's good enough for now, it has to be, until I get up and push forward.
To write something down is much easier to do than doing said written something. To even write that something is harder than thinking it, which is naturally harder than not even thinking it to begin with. Is this my ultimate goal? To do absolutely nothing? I am pulled toward this goal more often than finding motivation, and suicide seems to be the solution to this goal because in death, there is nothing. However, some part of me won't pull the trigger, because the knowledge of what could have been, and that I still have a chance to find out. I put the safety back on and remove the rifle out from under my jaw. Am I good enough for this world? Should I be allowed to live? Can I actually change? At least for now I can think of these things and that's good enough for now, it has to be, until I get up and push forward.