Starting to like the shadow world...

[ibetweaking]

so i had a huge episode of meth psychosis mixed with a bit of k yesterday and i had full a Out of body visual experiene where i left reality to an unidentified girls room she was very attractive though i couldnt see either of there faces and just laid on the bed holding hands with a man but i was invisible like a ghost i couldnt/didnt want to move it felt natural this sounds cringy as fuck but i snapped back remembering it pleasently and also deeply thinking about my life decisions and some major depression after is meth psychosis/The ketamine trying to tell me something ??? I stil havent stopped thinking about how alone i felt when i snapped out of it i held a gun to my head for 40 minutes straight with no intent to pull the trigger just didnt know any other reaction i dont know why this hallucination effects me like this it wasnt scary or nightmarish... and i have never had a hallucination so vivd from sleep deprivation or k or any drug for that matter


also a childhood friend was shot and killed recently over some heroin and turf bullshit so idk if this effected it but i dont see how this is related to what i saw or was feeling

 

[stu71]

Yup, the ketamine is telling ya somthing alright

Its letting you know your future, cherrish that feeling, never forget it, cause without a doubt in the end we are all gonna be laying on that bed holding hands

its Called -----> Love

 

[Mafioso]

Not everyone comes back, and at some point you might not either. Mental health isn't something to toy with. It can be fragile, and is always precious. It's how you perceive the world. It's how you think. It's how you feel. Most people walking the streets talking to themselves started out as normal kids.

 

[falsifiedhypothesi]

I agree with Mafioso, permanent mental change sneaks up on you. If you continue to put your mind through this kind of mental stress it will adapt and learn from the stress. Eventually your view of the world is so warped that it completely changes what you believe is true and rational.

I experienced bouts of psychosis from weed for a couple years when i was smoking, once i stopped it took a few years to recover. Even now that i feel fully recovered i still get little flashes of that paranoid psychotic feeling, they don't happen often and i can easily push through them but it just goes to show that it's not so easy to undue the psychotic mentality. There is still some of that mentality lying dormant in my brain, human experiences never go away they just get stored either in the main shop or a distant warehouse.