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Sexual Desire

J

Janitorisalive

Greenlighter
Joined
Mar 19, 2016
Messages
4
Hello good people.

I wanted to hear your opinion about my sexuality.
Is there anything wrong with me? So, I am 20 years old, and my "problem" is that I love sex too much. It started since I tried it for the first time, 2 and a half years ago. I am still with the same girlfriend, and we are in serious relationship. On start of our relationship, we did it in average once per day when we are together. But because it was kind of a long distance relationship, we didn't see each other every day, so we had sex much less than 365 days per year. Probably abour 60-70 instead. Now when we live together, after 2.5 years we still have sex but a bit less, maybe 3-4 times per week. My gf is totally ok with our sex life, but I am not. I think it's worth mentioning that when we have sex, it's great. Problem is that I didn't change at all since I was 17... I think about sex a lot during the day, and during the night. I am pretty sure I am something you would all call a perv. Am I a sex addict? Well I don't really think so since I can control myself. I don't cheat or do some dangerous stuff. I don't masturbate with parents in room next door or something.. I can control myself enough not to do that. But I do think about it a lot, 30 times per day or more. How much do I want it? Well, since the start of our relationship, since I experiecned it for the first time, I want it 3-4 times per day. 2 times per day is like the minimum for me to be perfect. That didn't change since I was 17. Mostly because of this reason, that I want sex more than my girlfriend, I am initiating it more than she does, not much more, but more. We have had a talk once about this, and we have came to the conclusion that I want it more than her, but we both agreed that it's bad to do it when any of us isn't really in the mood. Also, I can't really complain about her since she is pretty normal, 3-4 times per week isn't that bad, it's just.. God I want more. At least 2 days per day would make me very happy.
What do you think I should do? Find a new GF? Try to shut down my sexual desire a bit? Something 3rd?

Some additional info: I am 100% sure that she doesn't cheat on me. And it's not like we still don't have it sometimes multiple times per day, but in average it's still 3-4 times per week. I love her, and she loves me.
 
you are young and there is the honeymoon period to take into account.
 
There's nothing wrong with you. Your sexual drive will decrease as you age. By the time you are 70, you will wonder what all the fuss was about.
I suggest you buy some porn and beat off whenever you feel the urge.
It will help you take your mind off it.
 
Janitorisalive said:
What do you think I should do? Find a new GF?
Click to expand...

Are you seriously considering this? You've been with the same girl for 2.5 years, living together, and have sex 3-4x a week (which is more than the avg), don't seem to have any major problems (I'm assuming), and the only reason would be that you're not getting enough sex? o_O? If you feel pretty strongly about that and you have been contemplating it, maybe you should see a sex therapist regarding a possible sex addiction. Sex addiction is when sex nearly starts destroying your life, no control, cheating constantly, engaging in risky behaviors, rape, etc. If you feel like you may get to that point, better see a professional sooner than later. Sex is a two road street, your partner has to want to do it for it to work. Otherwise, you need to find other avenues to safely release.
 
Janitorisalive said:
Hello good people.

I wanted to hear your opinion about my sexuality.
Is there anything wrong with me? So, I am 20 years old, and my "problem" is that I love sex too much. It started since I tried it for the first time, 2 and a half years ago. I am still with the same girlfriend, and we are in serious relationship. On start of our relationship, we did it in average once per day when we are together. But because it was kind of a long distance relationship, we didn't see each other every day, so we had sex much less than 365 days per year. Probably abour 60-70 instead. Now when we live together, after 2.5 years we still have sex but a bit less, maybe 3-4 times per week. My gf is totally ok with our sex life, but I am not. I think it's worth mentioning that when we have sex, it's great. Problem is that I didn't change at all since I was 17... I think about sex a lot during the day, and during the night. I am pretty sure I am something you would all call a perv. Am I a sex addict? Well I don't really think so since I can control myself. I don't cheat or do some dangerous stuff. I don't masturbate with parents in room next door or something.. I can control myself enough not to do that. But I do think about it a lot, 30 times per day or more. How much do I want it? Well, since the start of our relationship, since I experiecned it for the first time, I want it 3-4 times per day. 2 times per day is like the minimum for me to be perfect. That didn't change since I was 17. Mostly because of this reason, that I want sex more than my girlfriend, I am initiating it more than she does, not much more, but more. We have had a talk once about this, and we have came to the conclusion that I want it more than her, but we both agreed that it's bad to do it when any of us isn't really in the mood. Also, I can't really complain about her since she is pretty normal, 3-4 times per week isn't that bad, it's just.. God I want more. At least 2 days per day would make me very happy.
What do you think I should do? Find a new GF? Try to shut down my sexual desire a bit? Something 3rd?

Some additional info: I am 100% sure that she doesn't cheat on me. And it's not like we still don't have it sometimes multiple times per day, but in average it's still 3-4 times per week. I love her, and she loves me.
Click to expand...

I think you are completely healthy and as far as the relationship goes, it seems to be real well.
You don't have the have sex the same amount of time after you are with someone for a longer period.
Besides, you gf is ok with your sex life you are young and there's nothing wrong with your thoughts IMO.
 
Well ok I guess. But you all said just that there is nothing wrong with my thoutlghts. Ok, but it looks like I am in the classic relationship where I want sex more than my partner. Let me tell something, that honestly sucks, it really really does. Seriously? 3-4 times per week is more than average? Why dont people have sex?? For me, once per day is minimum for happiness, and twice per day is perfect.
I guess I wont leave herbecause of this, and I definitely wont cheat, but I am just thinking, maybe she isnt right gorl for me. Maybe I can finf someone with similar sexual desire as mine, and we can both be more happy that way. Not sure what to do.
 
It just depends how much you value sex in a relationship.

1. Frequency of sex
2. Enjoyment or quality of sex
3. Being able to communicate effectively
4. No drama or excessive fighting
5. No physical violence or verbal abuse
6. Being able to co-exist in a household
7. Respecting each other
8. A genuine love and care for one another
9. Stability
10. An emotional connection

How would you order them? (1 being the most important and 10 being the least)
 
Pretty_Diamonds said:
It just depends how much you value sex in a relationship.

1. Frequency of sex
2. Enjoyment or quality of sex
3. Being able to communicate effectively
4. No drama or excessive fighting
5. No physical violence or verbal abuse
6. Being able to co-exist in a household
7. Respecting each other
8. A genuine love and care for one another
9. Stability
10. An emotional connection

How would you order them? (1 being the most important and 10 being the least)
Click to expand...

Hm, this is pretty hard but I'll try.
1. An emotional connection
2. No physical/verbal violence
3. Communication
4. Love and care
5. Quality of sex
6. Frequency
7. Being able to co-exist in a household
8. Respecting each other
9. Stability / no drama, i think this is pretty much the same.

Basically if sex is good and there are emotions, it will automatically be stable.
 
So would it make sense to leave your girlfriend for another girl that might ONLY meet the frequency of sex? 9/10 is pretty damn good!
 
If it were me, I wouldn't find a different girlfriend. I would find another, or additional girlfriend .
 
Some say sexual desire falls off as we age, perhaps it does. However I think it's a frame of mind and lack of adventure. During the time my husband and I raised our kids yes sex took a back seat many times as the daily activities trumped sex. At 55 years old we are sex freaks since our kids are grown and gone raising their own families. What sparked our sexual adventure was when my husband suggested inviting other men into our bedroom. With both of us being Bi sexual he and I really enjoy Bi sexual play. When my husband and I have sex we truly make love and it's fantastic. When I sleep with his buddies it's just sex, nothing more just sex and it's just for fun. I love it when he is pleasuring one of my girl friends and to hear her screaming in pleasure as he works his big cock is a turn on for me. My husbands best friend is a frequent visitor in my bed and I know when he is working his cock my husband loves that as well. So sex doesn't die as we get older, ways need to be found to keep it alive and well at least for us.
 
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