Hey all - so I’m hoping for some inspiration. I’m currently in the throes of a second long period of coke-induced upheaval (heavy binges of 7-28g every 1-3 weeks or so). Thing is, it’s really not fun anymore and hasn’t been for quite some time: I always do it alone, (wife doesn’t know) and I almost instantly enter a state of full blown psychosis (positive my neighbors are on my back porch roof, cops I’m the house etc), which keeps me in a dark room paralyzed with paranoia 95% of the time I’m using it. So yeah - not fun.
I look at all the pros (none really) and cons ($$, deceit, destroying or nearly destroying my marriage, my self esteem, my financial well being etc) and despite all this my brain still ends up rationalizing grabbing another 8-ball cause my wife will be gone most of the day (that one inevitably turns into 2-3+).
I’ve gone through long periods of non-use (many months to a couple years at a time), but looking back I started dabbling some 20 years ago.
For those that have kicked blow or other similar stimulants what was your mental battle like and how did you ultimately overcome what I guess are the “cravings”? I am seeing a therapist every couple of weeks and have told her about my use, but it’s not yet a focus of those session (thinking it should be). But what I’m really longing for are stories of success and the inner journey some of you may have taken to overcome this.
Thanks and hope for a peaceful day.
I look at all the pros (none really) and cons ($$, deceit, destroying or nearly destroying my marriage, my self esteem, my financial well being etc) and despite all this my brain still ends up rationalizing grabbing another 8-ball cause my wife will be gone most of the day (that one inevitably turns into 2-3+).
I’ve gone through long periods of non-use (many months to a couple years at a time), but looking back I started dabbling some 20 years ago.
For those that have kicked blow or other similar stimulants what was your mental battle like and how did you ultimately overcome what I guess are the “cravings”? I am seeing a therapist every couple of weeks and have told her about my use, but it’s not yet a focus of those session (thinking it should be). But what I’m really longing for are stories of success and the inner journey some of you may have taken to overcome this.
Thanks and hope for a peaceful day.