Question about sexual fantasies?

[tracedwards313]

We all have them and they are limitless in variety and depth. Some people take their sexual fantasy life to levels that are hard to understand for most people and I personally find it fascinating to hear what people are in to. The complexity and diverse world of sex fantansy is equivalent to the human population, it basically never ends.

Im interested in one general and major driving turn on for many, which is the deviant/taboo/hardcore side of so many peoples fantansies.

On the surface it isn't difficult to understand why many people like the idea of intense, often violent and naughty types of sex. It seems like a lot people who are highly sexually active end up leaning more toward this type of sex. Obviously, not everyone and not always. But, Im not even talking about sex we actually HAVE more about the sex we may fantasize about but maybe wouldn't even do in real life given the chance.

I guess what I want to understand is why is it such a prevalent theme for people to fantasize about sex that is wrong, bad, off-limits, controlling, aggressive, forceful, manipulative, I could keep writing adjectives lol but just that whole general idea.

Why is it often easier to get off to something that would probably embarrass you, if not worse if anyone found out about it?

Think about the most perverted shit you ever got off on? You sick fuck lol and why is it that no one gets off to "making love" fantansies?

Basically, Id like to know what you think. You might disagree with me? If not, why do you think fucked up sexual fantansies are so much hotter than nice and sweet ones?

 

[GetMeOutOfThisCRAP]

We live in a society where sex is no longer about marriage, monogamy, or emotional attachment. It's predictable that we would grow bored of traditional missionary sex and seek other ways to excite ourselve sexually.

As far as aggressive sex, there's always been a dominant-submissive factor to sex in general since the dawn of time. Some people like wearing leather and BDSM activities lol. As long as it's consensual who cares? A lot of pornography is filled with rape fantasies nowadays and I think it does influence how men treat women a little bit. A lot of men have no clue how to please women in bed and never will figure it out because they watch porn and try to mimmic it. I've noticed that people are far different in bed than out of bed. It's just a different side of them that's detached from who they are in a way--or at least we're forced to hide that part of ourselves.

I have a fantasy about watching a couple make love in front of me like IRL porn. Hope one day I can fulfill this

 

[Infernal]

First I'd preface this with saying that the notion of this being new or surprising or a "blight on times modern" is ahistoric. Fetish sexuality has a long history going back to our earliest records and in fact there are many suggestions that our near ancestors may have just had a generally healthier attitude towards sex in general.

With that out of the way, I'd say that what makes these things exciting is that they are generally perceived in the public venue as forbidden. If you want to compare it to drugs as an example, look at those places where drug harm reduction rather than outright prosecution has been attempted and see how our handling of the results of addiction is generally healthier. Titillation and the general "yuckiness" factor makes those acts into an adventure and people are damn well going to try that. Couple that with modern technology and even the most niche "dragons fucking cars" fetish becomes attainable (to a degree ).

Now, the boring part? I'd say that as a species we tend to be overworked, exploited, and with little time for actualization due to the general outcome of the economic and political systems we live in. Because of that I would posit that human connection, which takes time, is put to the wayside of convenience of finding what gets your genitals engorged. If I work twelve hours a day just to afford to eat and a place to sleep, the idea of time becomes valuable and human connection goes by the wayside. The wide variety of arrangements and fetishes becomes attractive as I'll never really get bored because as the old adage goes, "if you can think of it, porn of it exists on the Internet." It isn't that we are more degenerate now than we've ever been, its that its way, way easier.

If you want something mindblowing, go look up the comparison between the Eastern German orgasm versus the Western German orgasm before the fall of the wall. Its enlightening to see how much simple economics can affect your O face.

 

[atara]

Sexual arousal is controlled by the autonomous nervous system, which typically directs physiological responses to strong emotions such as fear, hunger, etc. In order to engage the reflexive responses that control arousal, the mind looks for stimuli, real or imagined, to induce an emotional response. These stimuli need to be strong enough to induce an unconscious response in order to achieve the necessary physiological effect.

Misattribution of arousal - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Basically, you need something to get your heart pumping.

First I'd preface this with saying that the notion of this being new or surprising or a "blight on times modern" is ahistoric.

I think it's worth noting that sex itself used to be mysterious. Nobody knew how physics worked, that magic didn't exist, that spirits weren't judging them, et cetera. The fact that sex acts are generally harmless is not obvious based on how they feel. People used to actually believe that having an orgasm affected your soul or something.

Sex by itself in the modern era is a lot less scary than it used to be, and while that might be inconvenient, it's not something that can be reversed. Simply ordering people to wait until marriage isn't going to recreate the prescientific era.

For most of human history, sex was a strange and seemingly dangerous activity. In that light I think it makes more sense why people look for something with a similar psychoemotional profile.

 

[Wilson Wilson]

I have a fantasy about watching a couple make love in front of me like IRL porn. Hope one day I can fulfill this

What a coincidence because my gf has a fantasy about being watched...

Haha honestly these days a lot of BDSM stuff is just mainstream now, happened pretty quickly too, and as much as I and anyone else in the BDSM scene hates 50 Shades it did bring this stuff into the mainstream and make a lot more socially acceptable.

This is good and bad. Good because it's nice to not be discriminated against for your sexual preferences and it also makes it easier to find a partner into the stuff you are when it can be discussed more openly. Bad because frankly the mere fact something is taboo makes it hotter, so now BDSM is more mainstream you gotta look for "darker" stuff if you wanna be taboo.

Something I find interesting is the increase in the popularity of incest fantasy. On porn sites you often see videos with titles alluding to parents (or step parents, because that somehow makes it "better" haha) and brothers and sisters. On erotica sites, which are majorly female dominated, you see that incest is the most popular category on Literotica.

I reckon the simple and obvious explanation is that incest is taboo and is unlikely to become mainstream any time soon. Taboo = hot. Simples.

A very very common sexual fantasy and common request for roleplay among women, in my experience, is good ol' rape fantasies. Again it's taboo, and also has a strong connection to power dynamics which is a running theme in all this kinky shit. Most women I've been with have admitted to me they had such fantasies they wanted to play out. They were shy about admitting it because it scares off a lot of guys for some reason.

This is another funny thing. Men have more testosterone and a higher sex drive on average. But they're also far more vanilla on average it seems. The amount of women who told me their ex's felt uncomfortable even spanking them was surprising to me. Women seem to be the kinkier ones. Interesting.

There is some data to back this up too. Women who watch porn are more likely to go for the hardcore shit. I can dig up articles if anyone is curious.

Oh and as for power dynamics, again just going off the BDSM scene, men tend to be about 50/50 whether they're dom or sub, while the majority of women tend to be subs, then there's some switches, then most rarely is dommes.

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

Necrophillia