KoSekki
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Aug 7, 2015
- Messages
- 5
Hi Bluelight, i'm not in a DIRE situation but I could use some help if anyone can throw out some ideas. Anything will be appreciated.
I have a problem. I grew up with a nice house/family/grandparents/lifestyle. Basic middle class. Father worked, mother is disabled, and I have a brother.
In 2005 my father passed away, and my mother got some money, but she blew it all and this feburary, we lost our house, so now she's living with me in a one bedroom apartment. Ontop of this, most of my family had died off, so the stress of all this has given me these wonderful mental illnesses....PTSD with flashbacks/Major treatment Resistant Depression/OCD/Bi-polar disorder [Depressive more than manic] and Anxiety, and i've been treated by a psychiatrist for them before I lost half my paycheck and can no longer see a doc.
Well I am also a Suicide Survivor. The doc put me on Paxil for almost an entire year then weened me off incorrectly, sooo one night I got horridly...suicidal and I ate 30mg Lorazepam ontop of 6 grams of Diaphenhydramine Hcl. Was a fun night....
anyway, because of how my life is, I just have no energy, no motivation, no....will to push forward...get a second job etc....so i've managed to focus on two things.
Dopamine and Norepinephrine. So i've combined Propylhexedrine with L-Tyrosine and the results have been amazing. I am focused, I want to work, I want to rebuild our lives and I actually WANT to live.
The problem is this.... I can't keep buying Propylhexedrine, it's expensive, and I don't like to abuse drugs or even take them without a doctor watching me. Doctors here in PA are VERY cautious on prescribing stimulants/controlled substances. So I am worried about what to do to fix this.
How do I go upto a Psyciatrist and say. "Hi...i'm a walking ball of Mental Illness, the only thing that actually shows massive improvement in my life is me abusing kitchen crank basically, and sucking down Tyrosine like it's candy.....Oh I also attempted suicide and i've tried every single drug under the sun with no effect."
I think I need to be put on heavy stimulants, because everything else we've/i've tried.
Here's what i've tried over the past 2 years.
1. Sertraline - Used for 1-2 years. Can't really rmember naything positive about it, made me emotionally baseline.
2. Paxil - Caused me to attempt suicide in janurary.
3. Effexor- Caused severe drowsyness all day.
4. Viibryd - Ineffective
5. Buproiprion - Worked, but only at maximum dosage.
6. Kratom - Used for pain and for energy, Completely Ineffective.
7. DL-Phenylanaline - Works, keeps me from being too depressed.
8. Tyrosine - Works at HIGH doses, 2-4grams/dose combined with Propyl
9. Buprenorphine - Incredible anti-depressant, I had energy, I was happy but not manic. Made me want to live life.
10. Tramadol - Same as Buprenorphine, worked incredibly well.
11. 5-HTP - No noticeable effect.
12. St.Johns Wort - Very minor effect.
13. SAM-E - Ineffective.
14. Lithium - Worked pretty well for bipolar disorder at very low dose. 200mg?
15. Clonidine - Worked very well for incredibly stressful situations.
16. Oxyracetam - Nootropic medication, essentially a vitamin for your brain, no psycological effect.
17. Adrafinil - No Effect.
18. Klonipin - Worked very well for panic attacks, but not needed at this time.
19. Cymbalta - Tried 3 tablets but could not afford the rest.
20. L-theanine - Ineffective.
21. Propylhexedrine 500mg. Effective, no jitters, no blasted euphoria, I have energy, I actually get work done and it's completely effective for ALL my symptoms. No Psycosis noted.
Nothing has given me such side effect free improvement to my life except L-tyrosine and Propylhexedrine. My friend even gave me adderall 20mg's and even they didn't do as much as Propyl did.
Any ideas?
I have a problem. I grew up with a nice house/family/grandparents/lifestyle. Basic middle class. Father worked, mother is disabled, and I have a brother.
In 2005 my father passed away, and my mother got some money, but she blew it all and this feburary, we lost our house, so now she's living with me in a one bedroom apartment. Ontop of this, most of my family had died off, so the stress of all this has given me these wonderful mental illnesses....PTSD with flashbacks/Major treatment Resistant Depression/OCD/Bi-polar disorder [Depressive more than manic] and Anxiety, and i've been treated by a psychiatrist for them before I lost half my paycheck and can no longer see a doc.
Well I am also a Suicide Survivor. The doc put me on Paxil for almost an entire year then weened me off incorrectly, sooo one night I got horridly...suicidal and I ate 30mg Lorazepam ontop of 6 grams of Diaphenhydramine Hcl. Was a fun night....
anyway, because of how my life is, I just have no energy, no motivation, no....will to push forward...get a second job etc....so i've managed to focus on two things.
Dopamine and Norepinephrine. So i've combined Propylhexedrine with L-Tyrosine and the results have been amazing. I am focused, I want to work, I want to rebuild our lives and I actually WANT to live.
The problem is this.... I can't keep buying Propylhexedrine, it's expensive, and I don't like to abuse drugs or even take them without a doctor watching me. Doctors here in PA are VERY cautious on prescribing stimulants/controlled substances. So I am worried about what to do to fix this.
How do I go upto a Psyciatrist and say. "Hi...i'm a walking ball of Mental Illness, the only thing that actually shows massive improvement in my life is me abusing kitchen crank basically, and sucking down Tyrosine like it's candy.....Oh I also attempted suicide and i've tried every single drug under the sun with no effect."
I think I need to be put on heavy stimulants, because everything else we've/i've tried.
Here's what i've tried over the past 2 years.
1. Sertraline - Used for 1-2 years. Can't really rmember naything positive about it, made me emotionally baseline.
2. Paxil - Caused me to attempt suicide in janurary.
3. Effexor- Caused severe drowsyness all day.
4. Viibryd - Ineffective
5. Buproiprion - Worked, but only at maximum dosage.
6. Kratom - Used for pain and for energy, Completely Ineffective.
7. DL-Phenylanaline - Works, keeps me from being too depressed.
8. Tyrosine - Works at HIGH doses, 2-4grams/dose combined with Propyl
9. Buprenorphine - Incredible anti-depressant, I had energy, I was happy but not manic. Made me want to live life.
10. Tramadol - Same as Buprenorphine, worked incredibly well.
11. 5-HTP - No noticeable effect.
12. St.Johns Wort - Very minor effect.
13. SAM-E - Ineffective.
14. Lithium - Worked pretty well for bipolar disorder at very low dose. 200mg?
15. Clonidine - Worked very well for incredibly stressful situations.
16. Oxyracetam - Nootropic medication, essentially a vitamin for your brain, no psycological effect.
17. Adrafinil - No Effect.
18. Klonipin - Worked very well for panic attacks, but not needed at this time.
19. Cymbalta - Tried 3 tablets but could not afford the rest.
20. L-theanine - Ineffective.
21. Propylhexedrine 500mg. Effective, no jitters, no blasted euphoria, I have energy, I actually get work done and it's completely effective for ALL my symptoms. No Psycosis noted.
Nothing has given me such side effect free improvement to my life except L-tyrosine and Propylhexedrine. My friend even gave me adderall 20mg's and even they didn't do as much as Propyl did.
Any ideas?