Misc Please Help, How do I talk to a Psyciatrist about this?

[KoSekki]

Hi Bluelight, i'm not in a DIRE situation but I could use some help if anyone can throw out some ideas. Anything will be appreciated.

I have a problem. I grew up with a nice house/family/grandparents/lifestyle. Basic middle class. Father worked, mother is disabled, and I have a brother.

In 2005 my father passed away, and my mother got some money, but she blew it all and this feburary, we lost our house, so now she's living with me in a one bedroom apartment. Ontop of this, most of my family had died off, so the stress of all this has given me these wonderful mental illnesses....PTSD with flashbacks/Major treatment Resistant Depression/OCD/Bi-polar disorder [Depressive more than manic] and Anxiety, and i've been treated by a psychiatrist for them before I lost half my paycheck and can no longer see a doc.

Well I am also a Suicide Survivor. The doc put me on Paxil for almost an entire year then weened me off incorrectly, sooo one night I got horridly...suicidal and I ate 30mg Lorazepam ontop of 6 grams of Diaphenhydramine Hcl. Was a fun night....

anyway, because of how my life is, I just have no energy, no motivation, no....will to push forward...get a second job etc....so i've managed to focus on two things.

Dopamine and Norepinephrine. So i've combined Propylhexedrine with L-Tyrosine and the results have been amazing. I am focused, I want to work, I want to rebuild our lives and I actually WANT to live.

The problem is this.... I can't keep buying Propylhexedrine, it's expensive, and I don't like to abuse drugs or even take them without a doctor watching me. Doctors here in PA are VERY cautious on prescribing stimulants/controlled substances. So I am worried about what to do to fix this.

How do I go upto a Psyciatrist and say. "Hi...i'm a walking ball of Mental Illness, the only thing that actually shows massive improvement in my life is me abusing kitchen crank basically, and sucking down Tyrosine like it's candy.....Oh I also attempted suicide and i've tried every single drug under the sun with no effect."

I think I need to be put on heavy stimulants, because everything else we've/i've tried.

Here's what i've tried over the past 2 years.

1. Sertraline - Used for 1-2 years. Can't really rmember naything positive about it, made me emotionally baseline.
2. Paxil - Caused me to attempt suicide in janurary.
3. Effexor- Caused severe drowsyness all day.
4. Viibryd - Ineffective
5. Buproiprion - Worked, but only at maximum dosage.
6. Kratom - Used for pain and for energy, Completely Ineffective.
7. DL-Phenylanaline - Works, keeps me from being too depressed.
8. Tyrosine - Works at HIGH doses, 2-4grams/dose combined with Propyl
9. Buprenorphine - Incredible anti-depressant, I had energy, I was happy but not manic. Made me want to live life.
10. Tramadol - Same as Buprenorphine, worked incredibly well.
11. 5-HTP - No noticeable effect.
12. St.Johns Wort - Very minor effect.
13. SAM-E - Ineffective.
14. Lithium - Worked pretty well for bipolar disorder at very low dose. 200mg?
15. Clonidine - Worked very well for incredibly stressful situations.
16. Oxyracetam - Nootropic medication, essentially a vitamin for your brain, no psycological effect.
17. Adrafinil - No Effect.
18. Klonipin - Worked very well for panic attacks, but not needed at this time.
19. Cymbalta - Tried 3 tablets but could not afford the rest.
20. L-theanine - Ineffective.
21. Propylhexedrine 500mg. Effective, no jitters, no blasted euphoria, I have energy, I actually get work done and it's completely effective for ALL my symptoms. No Psycosis noted.

Nothing has given me such side effect free improvement to my life except L-tyrosine and Propylhexedrine. My friend even gave me adderall 20mg's and even they didn't do as much as Propyl did.

Any ideas?

 

[deos68]

shiiiiit brother i for one am speechless
glad to know after all that you are still among us
i truly hope you get the help/advice you need from our fellow BL members
but at the same time if something works ....scripted or not by any means necessary is the motto i live by

 

[Kittycat5]

It will no doubt be hard. I want to say learn how to convince a psych you have ADD but not being truthful is not always the best option.

I think you can forget about tramadol or bupe. No psychiatrist is going to take that risk these day. Plus, bupe doctors can only see limited patients and opioids have been shown to have diminishing returns for depression.

You have failed 2 SSRIs, 2 SNRIs, a novel AD ( Viibryd) and only max Buproprion works. Furthermore the supplements that at least have some efficacy in depression (St John and SAMe) had no effect.

If you are honest about all you said here and can provide medical records to prove it, you may be able to get a doctor to precribe a stimulant.

If propylhex works well, methylphenidate may be preferable as it effects norepinephrine to a greater extent than amphetamine, as does propylhexedrine. Stimulants have been demonized, but they play a crucial role in resistant depression. Try to emphasize the refractory nature of your condition, which of course seems truthful.

Another option may be atomoxetine (Strattera). It is not a stim per se but an NRI. I am not a huge fan of it and not approved for depression but may be worth a shot. A doctor would be far less concerned in rxing it as well.

Also, if buproprion worked, why not give it ago again as well?

 

[Kittycat5]

Shit, missed the part about cant see a doc. There certainly are resources for mental health patients with limited means. Things like Catholic Charity and a million others. You got to do the research on whats available in your area but help is out there.

Also, since you are bipolar, lamotrigine may be beneficial. And definitely get something to stabilize the mood (lithium, certain antipshycotics) as any of these antidepressents, save the aforementioned lamotrigine could trigger mania/hypomania.

Good luck man.

 

[poppyplanet]

Since you have great positive experience with Bupe, I'd say go to a suboxone dr. and get back on them, schedule and appt. with a psychiatrist and ask your psychiatrist to prescribe you a benzo while you are taking bupe prescribed. I think if you don't abuse your benzos, this can be a great combo for depression and ptsd.

 

[poppyplanet]

Also, tramadol works wonders. I was on that drug by itself taking nothing else and it gave me my life back in a lot of ways. Maybe look into taking that again.

 

[KoSekki]

shiiiiit brother i for one am speechless
glad to know after all that you are still among us
i truly hope you get the help/advice you need from our fellow BL members
but at the same time if something works ....scripted or not by any means necessary is the motto i live by

Thank you mate ^^ It's been hell for the past 7 years while we were under siege....you don't come out of a siege with no scars

Shit, missed the part about cant see a doc. There certainly are resources for mental health patients with limited means. Things like Catholic Charity and a million others. You got to do the research on whats available in your area but help is out there.

Also, since you are bipolar, lamotrigine may be beneficial. And definitely get something to stabilize the mood (lithium, certain antipshycotics) as any of these antidepressents, save the aforementioned lamotrigine could trigger mania/hypomania.

Good luck man.

Thank you for the advice ^^ Much appreciated, hopefully I can think of something to tell him that stims have had the best effect. I'll correlate all my data and throw together a medical journal. ^^

Also, tramadol works wonders. I was on that drug by itself taking nothing else and it gave me my life back in a lot of ways. Maybe look into taking that again.

TRAMADOL WAS GODLY.

 

[Kittycat5]

I asked above but maybe you missed in my ramblings .

Why did you stop the buproprion?

 

[KoSekki]

I asked above but maybe you missed in my ramblings .

Why did you stop the buproprion?

no doctor to keep prescribing it

 

[Kittycat5]

Why dont you Obamacare it? I mean I know it has many flaws, but it is tailor made for people in your situation.

 

[neverStory]

If you need a stim, is there anyway you can convince them you have ADD? The test is super easy. It's based half on the answers you give and how you take it. Fiddle with your pencil, get side tracked, and viola, ADD diagnosis with scripts.

 

[cj]

If you can't see a doctor then you have no choice but to buy street amphetamines unless I'm missing something? The I telnet has a wide variety of Stims you can order. You seem knowledgable about drugs so I won't spell it out for you. But yeah when you have a complacated medical history and limited means you sometimes have to cut corners and settle for imperfect solutions.