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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

Please give an opinion- long-term patient with questions no one else can answer

H

Harmredux

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 15, 2013
Messages
163
I apologize posting here if it's not the exact right spot, I'm guilty of wanting some responses as quick as possible. I will brief on background and have 2 questions.
12 years of pain patient, very few breaks. I have never copped on street though I would if I knew how just to get through 3-4 days between scripts. I am up to 120-180mg oxy, 60mg hydrocodone daily plus have a script for opium tincture (very,very long half-life but go through the 70ml (700mg) in about a week each month) but still run out. Today is first time in 6+months I have run out so early but also had spine shots recently so pain isn't bad.
I am thinking about asking for methadone for pain, my primary doc prescribes all this and would be very OK if I asked to switch.
Anyone have an opinion? I am sick of being on this merry-go-round even though I admit sometimes the opiates do more than just treat pain.

Also I can't find CBT therapy and even have friends that are mental health specialists that tell me it's nearly impossible to find CBT even in the crowded urban area I live in.

Any advice on either of these things.
 
To answer your last question first. If you live in the USA every city has a Community Mental Health office that is designed to treat patients that are low income. The CBT and other programs might not be as good as a private clinic but they do have certified therapists in them. Try to contact the Department of Health and Human services ( food stamp office ) in your area to find out where yours is. If you live in a crowded urban area there is help available. I live in a little town in the middle of nowhere and can get to one inside of 30 minutes.

It is a very bad idea to go looking in the street nowadays for pills. It's a good thing you don't know where to look. Unless you see them being filled in a pharmacy from a friends script and then having them divert them to you, you are playing russian roulette. Everything on the street is pressed fentanyl and RC's. EVEN if you could find someone to sell you their script you would never be able to afford it. Pharm pill prices are sky high because the holder of the script knows they are few and far between on the street and they can make a boatload of money on them. ( That's why I quit for good. Can't get a script and can't afford someone elses )

I understand the need to abuse your meds. We have all done it. Taking oxy , vicodin, and opium tincture and you have basically skyrocketed your tolerance. You can get on Methadone IF you are ready to dump the oxy ,vicodin, and opium. Not really sure what kind of patient gets prescribed 3 narcotic opioids but the only way off that merry go round is to take them as prescribed or get on methadone. From your post I don't think you are going to be satisfied though. Methadone isn't like the 3 opiods you are on. It may be stronger and have a longer half life but it isn't going to " fix " or replace the high you are getting now. Not even close. It wasn't designed to anyway but most people try and push the limit. Upping the mgs to catch a buzz only leads to high levels and diminishing returns.

You will get better replies but you said you wanted an answer quickly so I pretty much just gave you my 2 cents. Whether you taper down and take your meds the right way, or get on methadone, I do wish you good luck.
 
You are lucky to have a doctor willing to script those drugs . I wouldn’t want to lose those scripts by mentioning methadone or running out of pills early . Take a tolerance break or add some Kratom . Methadone has almost no euphoria and doesn’t have the stimulation like oxy . Once you get on methadone you will prob never be able to get another opiate script again
 
You definitely need a tolerance break. You’ve skyrocketed your tolerance and it will ruin you in the long run. If you need opioids for life you need to take them as directed but also remember that you’re not going to get much better than what you’re on now.

The stronger opioids give no high worth having, they make you super nauseous and sleepy. Little quality of life.
 
btechlc said:
very interesting, had no idea this drug was even scripted. Are you in the US? Do you have brand name for this medication?
Click to expand...
That was my thought as well...

But on to OPs question, I think methadone is a good choice for you, it will probably add some stability to your life, and if that is what you are after, I wouldn't worry so much about losing scripts. You can also order any opioid you want online....
 
Larimar said:
You are lucky to have a doctor willing to script those drugs . I wouldn’t want to lose those scripts by mentioning methadone or running out of pills early . Take a tolerance break or add some Kratom . Methadone has almost no euphoria and doesn’t have the stimulation like oxy . Once you get on methadone you will prob never be able to get another opiate script again
Click to expand...
This
 
Come on you guys, you are pointing OP away from maintenance, when he/she is clearly in a bad spot and IMO thats dangerous. If the current course is not sustainable something will happen, and we don't want that to be heroin and or fentanyl. OP have you considered kratom or suboxone? These drugs are cause LESS physical dependence than methadone, though they do still cause physical dependence.
 
Harmredux said:
I apologize posting here if it's not the exact right spot, I'm guilty of wanting some responses as quick as possible. I will brief on background and have 2 questions.
12 years of pain patient, very few breaks. I have never copped on street though I would if I knew how just to get through 3-4 days between scripts. I am up to 120-180mg oxy, 60mg hydrocodone daily plus have a script for opium tincture (very,very long half-life but go through the 70ml (700mg) in about a week each month) but still run out. Today is first time in 6+months I have run out so early but also had spine shots recently so pain isn't bad.
I am thinking about asking for methadone for pain, my primary doc prescribes all this and would be very OK if I asked to switch.
Anyone have an opinion? I am sick of being on this merry-go-round even though I admit sometimes the opiates do more than just treat pain.

Also I can't find CBT therapy and even have friends that are mental health specialists that tell me it's nearly impossible to find CBT even in the crowded urban area I live in.

Any advice on either of these things.
Click to expand...

Methadone might work but if you are using it for chronic pain it must be dosed 3 or so times a day.

Problem is, if you get on methadone and don't like it you are sort of in a difficult spot because your tolerance will be very high and switching will be a pain. If it works though then at least you'll be stable. I personally liked methadone but I wasn't a pain patient.

If you are taking all that i suppose you'd need alot, maybe ultimately something like 60-80mg 3x a day. Of course they won't start you at that, but my guess is you'll ultimately require something like that. I was once on 380mg of methadone a day and have no chronic pain, just a chronic appetite for opioids. Been off it for years however.
 
Sorry for your troubles. Maybe have a look here :
CHRONIC PAIN

Also, any idea how much of your pain is due to inflammation? Many people don't realize inflammation is commonly responsible for most of the pain they suffer from. IMHO there is nothing better for controlling inflammation-related pain than Prednisone. I take a daily maintenance dose of 10mg, and believe me, that makes all the difference.

🙏​
 
mr peabody said:
Sorry for your troubles. Maybe have a look here :
CHRONIC PAIN

Also, any idea how much of your pain is due to inflammation? Many people don't realize inflammation is commonly responsible for most of the pain they suffer from. IMHO there is nothing better for controlling inflammation-related pain than Prednisone. I take a daily maintenance dose of 10mg, and believe me, that makes all the difference.

🙏​
Click to expand...

You take 10mg of prednisone a day? What sort of pain? Prednisone can do some nasty things over time although 10mg isnt a high dose.
 
I've suffered from gout for 20+ years + I have various old injuries - wrist, hip and back - which Prednisone keeps in check nicely. Additionally, I have diabetes, which has a significant impact, systemically I mean. I'm actually able to drop it to 5mg daily, but for someone with serious chronic pain, 10mg is probably a better starting dose. What I'm saying is, even a moderate dose of Prednisone can have a major impact, with few if any side effects, and if that's the case for OP, it's certainly worth knowing.​
 
Prednisone makes me feel pure anger, I feel like punching a hole in the wall and burning the world when I take it, like I’m a bomb about to blow for 8 hours, and that’s at like 1 mg
 
So I got screwed because my usual modus operandi of expecting they are going to fill my scripts 2 days early was "go eff yourself' this month. With much hassling, got prescriber to call in so I have needed meds in about 2 1/2 days from now.
I have been straight with everyone involved (even had the balls to ask for a different med to get me through the next 3 days) and just said that I needed to discuss jumping to a different set of meds in the hopes they hot slightly different receptors.

Yes, I realize the absurdity of getting all this stuff and complaining, but I have been looking for ANY other solution to chronic pain and not only have been told that there is none, but no way in hell anyone else would prescribe me what I am getting now.

When I quit CT, I went for over 20 days with zero, positively zero sleep. Day 21-25 I slept maybe 1, then 3, then 5 hours a night.
I can't go through that trauma again, I have PTSD from it, legit.

So when I get to this point 2-3 times a year and stare down the barrel of 3 days of nothing (usually manage to taper a bit before) my mind goes into "how the eff am I going to feed that dragon for three days so it doesn't take bites outta ME?"

I usually start by looking on CL, but have never had the guts to call. I think about driving through the city 25 mins from here known for lots of open air markets, but again realize how dumb it is to risk so much for 3 days of suffering.

Took 3 OPMS Gold kratom tabs and I am not totally miserable, but I know what tonight, all day tomorrow and the 24-48 hours after that are going to be like.

Is it worth risking everything to try and find a connect so that when I run out extra bad 2-3 times a year I don't have to pay this piper?
IMO the piper gets paid every day with the things you give up in trade for pain relief. It's NOT recreational use remember. I can deal with pain, but the automatic response between doses (not feeling sick, just pain) is steadily climbing blood pressure until I relieve the pain- sometimes I can do that with TENS machine, lotions, etc. if I catch it early enough and it's only the leg, but once the piriformis nerve and fusion site get grumpy, if I don't squelch the pain the blood pressure gets to dangerous levels along with heart rates that climb steadily to 180 or so until I can get the pain under control.

Would you say that most if not all CL ads are just traps these days? I have so many goddam responsibilities I can't afford to be useless the next 3 days and I have no intention of stopping my usage because though I am on a constant search for ways to treat pain, I have never been given any options besides meds. There's no more operations, injections in the back only work to a certain point, I am end of the road last ditch relying on these little devils to have any quality of life.
 
HAhahaha I just realized it was exactly a month since I posted last. SS/DD...

I am always 100% honest with docs and just emailed mine to say "Doc, I have a bad tolerance and we need to do something about it because I am sick 2-3 days a month".

So stupid of me to think something is gonna change, obviously if I have been taking the same dosage for 7+ years it's gonna need upping- true or no?

So PLEASE before I go in and see her, what should I ask for? Something equivalent to 60mg oxy (x2 a day) and 60mg of hydro a day. I don't think 80's are going to be on the table, they are doing me a favor by giving me meds to begin with, but they know I do not BS and if I say let's try something different so I'm not a mess, they might.

32MG exalgo + 8mg dilaudids?

what do yall think?
 
Sounds like being honest with your doc is the best bet, they either really sympathetic or a unicorn script pusher..either way I’d go to the city before hitting up CL if that’s what you gotta do
 
THANK YOU. Nah, I have narc and/or mark written all over me, I'd get myself ripped off or worse, especially cause I have shakes really bad right now from WD + 3 OPMS gold kratom caps. I never did it before either, plus I'm kinda old and would stand out... about a hundred other reasons too, lot of cops are my friends there and I would not want to face that shame.
I just don't.want.to.be.in.WD. for the next 42 hours and 30 minutes.
Someone please tell me that I am crazy for jeopardizing this whole sitch by even considering this.

Yes, they are sympathetic, but I also am strict about never allowing even an ER doc to give me controlled substances, and my radiology shows very clear pathology to support my claims.

How the eff can I not find someone to help me for 2 days? Getting old sucks, all your friends lose their connections LOL
 
well between the 2 options I think the city is safer , one time me and my brother tryd to cop of CL, went to the location and my brother got out to meet him about 50ft from my car the guy pulled a gun pistol whipped my brother took the cash then pointed the gun at me in a “don’t try it” kind of way, started running and I tried to run him down with the car but he hopped a fence…drugs r crazy ha
 
Kind of the situation I want to avoid. Nope, city is out of the question.
I'm having surgery in 2 weeks and I have zero fear of being in pain after, but THIS STUPID problem I obsess over.
Tell me if I should post this somewhere else, but maybe you guys could tell me if any of the below should be utilized to lower tolerance, allow me some sleep, and get through the next 42 hours:
Here's what I stocked up on:

-DXM w/doxylamine (nighttime cough formula, the doxylamine is sominex)

-I have some bud, but I don't smoke, it doesn't help w/ pain and makes my heart race. I DO have a tiny nug soaked with the liquid opium I get scripted tho...

-microdoses of shrooms and enough to do a 4g trip if that helps. Guessing a big NO.

-valium (a billion, I hate them and get them filled just because it's basically free)

and obviously access to kratom and all other items OTC's

OHHH, and I have 1 tiny crumble left of a 60- probably 10-15mg of oxy. When should I take that?

I realize I am very fortunate in some ways (minus the lifelong pain and physical dependence) that I don't have any arrest record, good job, very comfortable and safe living situation (an intruder would be dead before they got within 100 feet of my house)

.... and I am being a crybaby. But some of you must know how much mental and physical anguish it is to be both WDing (with severe BP issues) AND in pain.

If anyone has ideas on how to minimize the kratom and make use of everything else please let me know. I also have a lot of blood pressure meds but they don't help much when my BP is this high. I don't want to jeopardize an ER visit because it would mess up my script situation but I also don't want to have a heart attack.

Cmon guys, help me figure out the next 41 3/4 hours : ). BTW I was considering like 100mg of valium and trying to sleep through a lot of it, but even though I never abused valium, even fresh name brand valium has little if any effect on me. I have no idea if this weird metabolic quirk is related to the reason I need such high doses of pain meds, or if it's just because this time of year I drink a 6 pack a day and my GABA receptors are just laughing at the valium.
 
Thanks. I just reupped on gold caps. I don't care about the money for 2 days, but when I get refills I it takes me a week to get proper pain relief after using the concentrates.
3 of them is 240mg mitragynine.
40 hours.
..
 
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