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Parents finding out about my habits

J

Jamesdean420

Bluelighter
Joined
May 26, 2017
Messages
28
So they have found out about my habits long ago but thought I quit. They found out I have been smoking in the woods. They found empty bottles of DXM in my bookbag which I was going to throw out this morning. I have to write some stupid essay on cigs by the time they get back. My dad has called the cops on me before. They are thinking about sending me somewhere. I need advice on what I should do. Should I run away? Should I remain calm? I'm in a shit ton of trouble and I'm thinking about getting fucked up on DXM even though they will notice. I use to have an alcoholic dependency and they made me switch schools and threw away all my band tee shirts. They said if I leave or don't do my stupid essay there calling the cops.
 
How old are you?
I'm guessing not that old, so my advise is to save the drug use until you're an adult and have your own place.
 
Yeah I knew someone would say something like that. What should I do about my staash they will find it eventually. I'm not going to quit though.
 
your in the same boat as me..dont run away cause that makes the problem worse...heres how i see it...if you want to get loaded you have to at least do some good so your family sees your doing well..get me? ...for example when i was using heroin i was working 6 days a week..so my family figured i was okay...you got to throw in some good with the bad..when your fam thinks your doing all bad then theyre on you like a hawk...but if your doing some good they dont really trip on you...hope this helps brahhh
 
Is it really that hard to write an essay on cigarettes? If it's this or face possible jail time, then just suck it up and accept your parents' punishment. While I wouldn't generally condone parents getting law enforcement involved if drugs is the only issue, the price you pay for being dependent on your parents is that you have to learn to abide by their rules, not get caught, or sometimes accept punishment when you do get caught.

I don't know anything about your life situation and I don't know what your relationship with your parents is like but if it is only your drug use that is causing the problem then try to understand that their efforts to control your life probably come from a place of love and concern rather than actual malice and an aimless desire to control you for no reason. This is a cliche but it's something you'll realise when you get older. Of course, I don't know how old you actually are but judging from your post you sound young.

You don't have to give up drug use, I used drugs while I lived with my parents and it did sometimes cause friction but I managed to keep things under control by firstly, mainly using drugs outside with friends, and not in my parents' house, and secondly, being meticulous about hiding evidence and my own use whenever I did use drugs in the house. Leaving empty DXM bottles around is just an amateur mistake, but of course it's progressively harder to be careful if you're getting fucked up all the time, and if you feel like you need to be high all the time then this is an issue that you should address as well, while you still can. Especially if it's got to the point that you can't just take a break from using for the sake of being able to continue leeching off your parents (not meaning this as an insult - I did this too for a while and I recognise it now, but it's a luxury that many people don't have and you shouldn't take for granted).

Obviously there could be other factors which make leaving your parents' care a more reasonable decision, but since you've only mentioned the drugs I feel like I need to present an alternative viewpoint to you here.

I know you want to keep doing whatever you want to do with no consequences but hey, welcome to life.
 
I'm not going to lie I don't think your parents are in the right, but not much you could do..... Throwing away your band tee shirts though? Do they forbid music too? I grew up with parents like that and even though back then it seemed like nothing I could see now how much they messed me up forcing me to accept double standards where I always was lesser. While it probably wouldn't be considered abusive nowadays I think it's very detrimental and even if they are unaware of the damage done putting such restrictions such as you seeking dxm for a high.

What I suggest is to do what your parents say now and stop using.... Trust me you want to save it till not only you can get something good and less harmful like pot, which can still be detrimental if wrongly used, but until you have your own space that you don't just have to worry about being seen and can do what you want.

I do suggest talking to them about this aggressive stance if you can. See if you can get them to understand you shouldn't use regularly, but if you do use you need to be safe and have a safe place to go and people to rely on to help if things go wrong. If you're out of the house, intoxicated, and afraid of your situation what would you do if you couldn't call your parents? Who would keep you safe? Maybe a psych ward in an ER, but you don't want that. You need to discuss boundaries with them you can both accept.

Try not to think too much about what I suggested just stop using. Definitely don't do the dxm. Get your life together and when you can be open about use with your parents then you can use if you maintain self restrain and honesty. Trust me you're too young for a dependancy like alcohol, which can kill you like benzo dependencies if you're not careful enough slowly reducing dosing and dependancy over a long time
 
Update:DXM is not the only drug I'm taking. I smoke grass too. And the other day he called the cops on me because I was hanging out with some friends while smoking a shit ton of weed. Anyways I'm going to take a break for awhile until I get my own apartment. There supposed to be taking me to some stupid doctor. And my step moms Mexican so I'm fucked. Thanks for all the help
 
Yes, don't run away. It will only make things worse for yourself.

Discussing things with your parents like d1nach suggested would be a good idea if it works but most likely your parents will not budge and will just get more angry and worried.

Since you stated you will not stop, I agree that you need to at least get your drug use under control so that you can use occasionally under the radar. It isn't that difficult to do so unless your reckless or using too much and/or too often.

Also, if your going to use drugs then you have to accept whatever consequences that occur. It's just how life is. If you feel the punishment is too severe then don't do the crime. This goes for both your parents rules while you live with them and the rules out in the real world.
 
Dude honestly I'm going to agree on the side of your parents, I mean either grow up and get your own place or respect your parents. It is their house their rules, I was the same way when I was young, you won't understand until you get older but what parent wants their child on drugs. I'm a drug addict because I DIDN'T have that authority you have. If I had someone trying to stop me from making the wrong moves in life like your taking for granted I wouldn't have had to do things the hard way in life.

My suggestion is to do like the average teen and slow your usage down to the point that you can use behind their back. If you do that, you can fool them and continue to leech. You'll thank them later. What happen to using while out with friends and getting visine and cleaning up before going home,...kids today

-heroin addict who wishes someone would've called the police to stop me before I got strunggg.
 
MuddledBarrel said:
Dude honestly I'm going to agree on the side of your parents, I mean either grow up and get your own place or respect your parents. It is their house their rules, I was the same way when I was young, you won't understand until you get older but what parent wants their child on drugs. I'm a drug addict because I DIDN'T have that authority you have. If I had someone trying to stop me from making the wrong moves in life like your taking for granted I wouldn't have had to do things the hard way in life.

My suggestion is to do like the average teen and slow your usage down to the point that you can use behind their back. If you do that, you can fool them and continue to leech. You'll thank them later. What happen to using while out with friends and getting visine and cleaning up before going home,...kids today

-heroin addict who wishes someone would've called the police to stop me before I got strunggg.
Click to expand...


Great example. OP, you always handle your stuff in front of family. Learning how to conduct business around them, will make you smarter and more effective in the future.
 
So, your parents are taking you to see a "stupid doctor"... sounds like a good fit. After all, stupid is as stupid does.
 
You don't even want to know how much money I would pay to send a message to my 15 year old self, and it would sound strikingly similar to many of the above posts. If you don't want to take any advice from the "squares" or the old people who don't understand at least listen to LosAngeles1993, post#4. It's a decent compromise as I doubt your going to turn your life around from advice off a message board but getting a job and a clean girlfriend could do wonders and open up a ton of possibilities. The money is obviously nice and I hope I don't have to list the advantages of a girlfriend, plus staying busy alone will make your free time more valuable and less likely to be spent on DXM or Robo-tripping.

While all seems lost now the future isn't and preparing for it will be an important task to you if it isn't already I promise. Bury your stash deep in the woods then dumb this essay down and print it for starters, might as well start now before your in a youth center.

 
tacodude said:
What I suggest is to do what your parents say now and stop using.... Trust me you want to save it till not only you can get something good and less harmful like pot, which can still be detrimental if wrongly used
just stop using. Definitely don't do the dxm. Get your life together and when you can be open about use with your parents then you can use if you maintain self restrain and honesty. Trust me you're too young for a dependancy like alcohol, which can kill you like benzo dependencies
Click to expand...

mokele said:
Tacodude,LESS HARMFULL THAN POT??
Like what? Cammomila tea? I dont beat on anyone, but your advice SUCKS!THINK BEFORE!!!!
Click to expand...

You might want to read that again when your not driving, maybe on a lap top..
 
I can see both sides, having been the using teenager hiding it from my parents, to being a parent of 2 current teenagers.

Your parents do have every right to call the police. If they don't want illegal substances in their home or are super worried about you, this is their right. I don't necessarily agree that it conducive to an open relationship but we all have our reasons for doing what we do.

Like some others have said, I wish I could go back in time and never touch the first cone, never short that first line, never stick that first needle in my arm.

I think your parents probably care a great deal but just don't know what to do. No parent wants to see their child on drugs. That's NORMAL. Throwing away your band tees etc i think is pointless but it sounds like they are not well equipped to deal with this issue, as mine weren't.

I agree with others, that if you want to do drugs then you need your own place, and it seems like you are doing that so that's great. Be careful though, it can quickly get so out of control and ruin your life. I hope that you and your parents can communicate openly one day. We recently found out that our oldest had been smoking pot - because he told us, he said he felt too guilty us not knowing. Even though my heart sunk, I was very proud that he came to us and i managed to remain calm - the LAST thing i wsnt is for any of my kids to struggle with addiction like i have. My husband hit the roof and through out all his stuff and really just created a massive gap between them. My son expressed his desire to stop and asked me for help, which I gave him and he is going very well. He won't talk to my husband about it though. Maybe express to your parents that you would be more open to talking about it if you felt safe to do so and their reactions weren't so severe - and that this does not at all mean they need to condone drug use, not one bit.
They are most likely just reacting out of fear
 
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When I got caught dude I got caught by Russian parents which is no joke ... which meant no tv , no friends coming over , you can't go outside , no ohone , my dad would make me write standards "I am not stupid I will not repeat X again" in Russian too which is fuckin hard...
He would even limit the foods I could eat for a week so I'd learn my lesson, I'm sure you can handle an essay on cigs dude... American kids have it so easy lol...
In the end I failed became super opiate addict still am but I guess point of it is calm down while you're under their roof , they pay for it.
Otherwise hustle move out and do whatever you want all day , growing up teaches you to compromise if you can't my man.
It was hard for me to accept but I began paying bills being a good boy keeping my usage on the low low so I wouldnt cause them strife and difficulty
 
You should consider yourself lucky to have parents that love you enough to try so hard to keep you from making bad choices that could ruin your life. Learn how to appreciate life and love your parents. That is so much important than abusing drugs. No one has perfect parents, so I can understand why you might be angry about them calling the cops or throwing your clothes away, in other words they might not be handling this is the best way but at least they are trying.

Like others have said, either obey your parents or learn how to use drugs in a way that they don't notice. You should be able to smoke some weed here and there without them noticing. You have the whole rest of your life to experiment with drugs. You don't need to be abusing lots of drugs at a young age, it leads to burning out fast and having a crappy life or worse. Learn how to be content with a little weed or relatively gentle herbs like kava and kratom. Kava is legal, tons of fun (better than a lot of illegal substances in my opinion) and very safe. Your parents probably wouldn't even know what it was and you could get away with using it. Even if they found it, you could show them that it was legal and even has health benefits.
 
I just got a job. I'm planning on getting an emancipation thanks for all the help guys. I just worked my ass off today
 
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