Hi friend, i hope my post helpurrrr you
I feel you doesnt understand the core of add, the executive function.
Im diagnosed and I show extremely evident add symptoms, its very hard for me to do things that I WANT AND NEED to do, but notcuz im distracted at all, (im, im not focused as supposed, or not really important focus), its more related to procastination. Thanks god and the family supporting me, respecting me, but that was two sided, never have been problematic or any, that doesnt mean all is good and pink, i had a very hard adolescence, really hard, lived alone hundred of kms ofany fam... mainly becouse personal family discussion and my father plus mine character.
But, back on topic, ADD is more explained as a executive disfunction, you know you NEED or WANT to do something, but is vomitive even sometimes lol, but you suffer at the same time becouse you know you will do it just seconds before the nuclear bomb explodes, if its not something highly undesirable becouse procastination, you can procastinate all your life, and suffer becouse you wannabe but u dont wannado, so that creates intrapersonal problems leading to another mental illnes commonly (im meth daily user last4 years, not proud, im a highly dependant user of good quality, feeling guilt everytime i purchase my shit, becouse is extremely expensive, and i have my own business where i work all the day.... for the needs, i know i can buy materialist expensive stupid or good shit if i wasnt using 1-3 minium salaries in my country daily to keep me awake, plus, benzo use for not feel or see like a tweaker, and other benefits, lead me to double addiction, idc clonaz, but rn im fighting and lowering the amph dose)
I respond perfectly to meth and vyvanse (well, meth is extremely abusable, and im not a very responsable user.., but im), my bad reaction a methylphen is it just last 1 and a half hour then makes me a shitty person angry with anyone and dysphoric-like, antisocial and something like arrogant person, so, i hate ritalin, isnt even abusable...)
I think becouse you description, your concerns are related more to other mental imbalances (nah chemical, thats bs, i use chemicals to enhance my productivity and life enjoy, and i create the disbalances in a deep way i know), for me, this all disorders, have a marked envoirment reason, not whats around you, but, what you learned to think about you, others, and the life daily things, determinated by who was around you at every moment in your life), its important to focus in that aspect, becouse meds, that are very effective for me, around 1/5 of them, just generate more problems at long term, you dont need any other cons, becouse are harsh problems that u dont want to experience, so, take care about meds, but feel free to try any u want with a medical supervision, you maybe can find something that completes your puzzle.
I havent tried modafinil in 7 years, then, i was dessesperated becouse my extremly high meth doses in 2020-2021 and how misserable was the reduction 2021-2022, then, a month ago, one psych prescribed to me modafinil 100mg 1x daily, well... its a low dose, but i dont want to take more cuz im still in meth daily, and other meds, but god, the first days was really noticeable, i can only say its the perfect stimulant, the touch of motivation needed to do the things without suffer or think to do another thing that u feel less disgusting, helped me i feel, to dont fall asleep 20 times daily at any place (yes, meth reduction caused like-narolepsy episodies, and was annoying, and suffered several hits of fall down at any place, not when i was stimulated outside my house walking, that was like at the bathroom, playing poker, reading something, then i hitted my head with the desktop and i got retard until today, for example), well... im founding an alternative to amphetamines, I WAS SURE THAT JUST AMPS WORKS AS DESIRED, and god, that was incredible to try something that gives me the executive labors smoothing effects at the modafinil levels, and i know i can potentiate tgat adding meds (soft ones... and supplement, sulbutiamine, racetams, rhodiola, ALCAR, etc.) or even more, changing life habits, but... i will let that for tomorrow, i will starting taking care about myself seriously just 1 day before i die of cancer.
IMO the modafinil is exactly what you dont need, or who knows, but can give you a super clean concentration, but not stop any, or well, maybe stop all internal dialogues, who knows, for me in that way, just make them more objectives, less divaguing, shorter, idk, but that feels chemically induced so much, isnt enjoyable, but isnt something bad at all.
Try straterra, have u tried SSRI? for me do shit, even if i takin rn 100mg sertraline daily, if im depressed gimme the buprenorphine IM or IV and why should i need another antidepressants useless, but i dont have the money to pay an opioid addiction rn, maybe i can take that stupid decission later.
other thinks comes to my mind that can help, racetams, try piracetam for first, always calm down, with low doses, unnoticeables, then try 2-3 days later your system cleaned, same dose, then if you want to feel it, redose after 2 hours, not same dose, half or less, depends of the compound, then, find the lowest effective dose (or seconday effects before any effective shit), then stay at that smooth point, trust me, i have abused tons of drugs that even i dont remember all the RCs i have injected when i was obsessed with them, 2013 idk.
Get medical advice over all my comments, that are just a opinion of a non-professional knowledge and i can be wrong at any point, just take it as an opinion, reasearch yourself and always talk to your medic what u doing, i can have prescript what i want, so, i dont need the psych rx to get any med i want to usel, so i feel super comfortable in that way, and was hard to find a psych that accepted to be flexible in my prescriptions, but was just prejuices, in the back im resopnsable and a good person, or another dumb word that describes me, im honest and the confidence growed with a younger and non frigid psych, very good one, i love he centers much more in my habits, and things to change, specially about my own love and the joy of being alive, with a honest comments about how im making suffering myself, and if i really want to change and why, and if im tried about being so childish with some habits, he doesnt talk me about life is good, he knows whats happening in my way to live, so, i fucking love my psych, but i often visit other ones just to know their opinions, its not really expensive private medical attention at Mexico, it HURTS in the budget a lot, most ppl dont have the money to see medical specialiced advice and prescription, or just is too much money to use in your health when maybe u have most important payments to do, but its not ridiculously expensive as other nations if you dont have insurance (i only have been at insurance 6 months of my life, plus the insurance by right when u are a kid or a student).
Wellll, hope my large post have at least one key that help you to find the way to your future improve.
Blesss!!
Mew
.
