TDS One month using Antabuse

[LemonadeShower]

So, as I posted before, my doctor prescribed me Antabuse because I have drinking issues. I'm one of those that can't have just one. And was drinking alone the last 2-3 years. Most of the time spirits and binge drinking. I had erratic behaviour, problems with friends and family and even managed to cut my chin (leaving a big scar) in a black out episode. I've passed out a lot while drinking with friends, become violent while drinking with them. Friends wouldn't want to hang out with me anymore because of my binge drinking (I would black out too soon, they had to worry about me being safe).

Besides my early teenage black out episodes, I'd say the worst thing that alcohol did to me was when I started to drink alone and became like a Dr. jekyll/ Mr Hyde kind of guy. When I was sober I'd act usually cool and not strange. But as soon as I started drinking on the weekend I'd start feeling narcistic-like and even paranoid. I'd get irritated by stupid things and could get really mad at someone for stupid things. I was afraid of myself and the things I could do.

My doctor said the Antabuse is the only thing that would keep me away from the booze, and help me recover from the disease. Here in Peru (where I live) there's no campral or similiar meds. I had to get the Antabuse from abroad, but ordering campral would be even more expensive and is out of question. He also told me to get topiramate, which I could buy locally and helps with the cravings.

So, I've been taking Antabuse and topiramate and I've been alcohol free for a month. The anxiety kills me, I feel like I'm constantly awake and alert and can't ease or slow the process of thinking. I don't have the alcohol to help me go numb as I was used to.

This is my question, which you might consider stupid with all the things I've gone trough: Would I (23 years old) be able to drink ever again? I'm not asking if I can (ofc I can grab a bottle and stick it into my lips, with or without the antabuse in my system). My question is if a person like me, who gets the antabuse prescribed, ever gets "healed" from this erratic behaviour linked to drinking and can enjoy a beer like a normal person. It doesn't matter if it's in 30-40 or 50 years. Or should I start assuming that I'm not gonna be drinking alcohol ever again.


Thanks every1 for reading what I come up with.
Sorry for my bad english.

 

[bakeryrogercow]

No.

But that's besides the point. You should be thinking about the present. One day at a time. Seriously. One. Day. At. A. Time.

Today I will not drink. I will not worry about tomorrow or next week. How can I make today as good as possible. Absolutely try seeing a therapist and potentially a psychiatrist. They can and will help you get over the anxiety.

Been there done that my friend. I worried for months about how I would drink again because I thought that was the only way I would be able to feel normal. It's not. You. Will feel normal while sober, it just takes time. Sobriety takes TIME. How you feel right now in early recovery is NOT how you will feel in 6, 10, 12 months. You will feel a lot less anxious and a lot more whole then.

One of the biggest reasons that people relapse is because they feel like crap in early sobriety everyone feels like crap in early sobriety! You have to give it time , at least a year. In 90 days you will feel like a million bucks compared to at 1 month out. In a year you'll be a new person. You have to give it time

Absolutely go to meetings, either AA or SMART depending on which you align with. Meetings aren't a joke or reserved for homeless people. I have been going to meetings for years working on my sobriety. There are a significant number of well to do white collar folks there. Ask me any questions I'm here to help.

 

[Moreaux]

Very few alcoholics can learn to drink responsibly. If we could drink responsibly we wouldn't have to go to extremes to quit drinking. I prolonged my alcoholism by several years trying to learn how to drink. I had a little over a year sober and thought I could drink normally again and it ended up being a two year binge that landed me right back in rehab. If you're being prescribed Antabuse I would have to say no, you probably will not being able to drink normally. Antabuse is seldom lay used anymore because of its dangerous side effect profile, they only give it out in extreme cases. Also, be careful of you do try to drink while taking it. I tongues the pills for a couple of days and thought it was out of my system enough and went out drinking. I had several beers before the reaction set in, and once it did I stopped breathing. It was touch and go for twelve hours at the hospital. Be very very careful on this medication. I recommend you look into the Vivitrol shot. I was on it for 8 months after having 28 days sober and I have now been sober for over two years...I feel like it reset my brain to preacoholism, though I haven't tested that theory by trying to drink. It works very well and helps lower anxiety while on it. Also, in the time I have been sober I have had zero cravings. I can't recommend this medication strongly enough. Good luck!

 

[bakeryrogercow]

Very few alcoholics can learn to drink responsibly. If we could drink responsibly we wouldn't have to go to extremes to quit drinking. I prolonged my alcoholism by several years trying to learn how to drink. I had a little over a year sober and thought I could drink normally again and it ended up being a two year binge that landed me right back in rehab. If you're being prescribed Antabuse I would have to say no, you probably will not being able to drink normally. Antabuse is seldom lay used anymore because of its dangerous side effect profile, they only give it out in extreme cases. Also, be careful of you do try to drink while taking it. I tongues the pills for a couple of days and thought it was out of my system enough and went out drinking. I had several beers before the reaction set in, and once it did I stopped breathing. It was touch and go for twelve hours at the hospital. Be very very careful on this medication. I recommend you look into the Vivitrol shot. I was on it for 8 months after having 28 days sober and I have now been sober for over two years...I feel like it reset my brain to preacoholism, though I haven't tested that theory by trying to drink. It works very well and helps lower anxiety while on it. Also, in the time I have been sober I have had zero cravings. I can't recommend this medication strongly enough. Good luck!

Just wanted to jump in here. I completely agree you should look into vivitrol.

However, in response to what you said about antabuse - I would use caution referring to it as having dangerous side effects. yes there are side effects. But not everyone will get them. If you are taking it for a month now and have not experienced any adverse events you are probably fine. Let's keep in mind the purpose of antabuse - to keep him from binge drinking day after day, which is much, much more toxic to the body than antabuse is. I am not downplaying what happened to you but this is a rare reaction to end up stop breathing. But I will reiterate, avoid all types of alcohol, including mouth washes, vanilla flavoring extract, certain cold medications, etc. I'd even be careful with hand sanitizers and any body product that contains alcohol as it can have a reaction while coming into contact with your skin.

Without a doubt, taking antabuse is safer than binge drinking; do not come off it simply because of a post you read online if you and your doctor are comfortable taking it and it is working for you.

And don't worry about down the road! You'll deal with that when you get there! Just focus on today. Today you will not drink alcohol and you will feel ever so slightly better than yesterday. Today you will do something to help with recovery. Maybe today you will join a gym or look into yoga or meditation, or even start a good book.

 

[Moreaux]

Just wanted to jump in here. I completely agree you should look into vivitrol.

However, in response to what you said about antabuse - I would use caution referring to it as having dangerous side effects. yes there are side effects. But not everyone will get them. If you are taking it for a month now and have not experienced any adverse events you are probably fine. Let's keep in mind the purpose of antabuse - to keep him from binge drinking day after day, which is much, much more toxic to the body than antabuse is. I am not downplaying what happened to you but this is a rare reaction to end up stop breathing. But I will reiterate, avoid all types of alcohol, including mouth washes, vanilla flavoring extract, certain cold medications, etc. I'd even be careful with hand sanitizers and any body product that contains alcohol as it can have a reaction while coming into contact with your skin.

Without a doubt, taking antabuse is safer than binge drinking; do not come off it simply because of a post you read online if you and your doctor are comfortable taking it and it is working for you.

And don't worry about down the road! You'll deal with that when you get there! Just focus on today. Today you will not drink alcohol and you will feel ever so slightly better than yesterday. Today you will do something to help with recovery. Maybe today you will join a gym or look into yoga or meditation, or even start a good book.

Antabuse is very toxic to the liver, and many alcoholics already have compromised liver function. It is not a long term medication, and it is important to have liver function tested every two weeks. I'm not going to downplay the level of severity of the side effects because this medication "may" work for his binge drinking disorder. I was a binge drinker also and Antabuse ultimately did nothing to stop my alcoholism. There are very real and potentially permenant or lethal side effects to this med, and many users get fed up with not being able to drink after a while and then try to drink after being off it for a day or so and the consequences are devestating.

There are much better alternatives with respect to medication therapy for alcoholics. Many doctors would just as soon send some body to inpatient rehab in lieu of Antabuse. If somebody can't control their drinking naturally, how are they going to control it while on a medication that stops metabolism of alcohol once it turns into acytelaldehyde? Essentially, many Antabuse users end up embalming themselves in a moment of weakness.

If aversion therapy had a high success rate than many addicts wouldn't have to go inpatient as the consequences of an addictive lifestyle would be sufficient for them to just quit, which obviously isn't the case. Also, a month of treatment on a medication isn't going to resolve the problem or stop the behaviour, and long term use of Antabuse isn't an option because it is so hard on the body. Normally I don't vilify medications, but I'm not going to sugar coat Antabuse and hope for the best when statistics substantiate my concerns. The trend in modern medicine is moving a way from prescribing this medication as it tends to be devestating and ineffective.

ETA: Rhe most effective treatment in alcoholism is to address the underlying motivations to drink/ often addiction is merely a symptom of a larger issue - the addict self medicates to eliminate pain from another source. It's much easier to get sober and healthy once that larger issue is addressed.

 

[bakeryrogercow]

Antabuse is very toxic to the liver, and many alcoholics already have compromised liver function. It is not a long term medication, and it is important to have liver function tested every two weeks. I'm not going to downplay the level of severity of the side effects because this medication "may" work for his binge drinking disorder. I was a binge drinker also and Antabuse ultimately did nothing to stop my alcoholism. There are very real and potentially permenant or lethal side effects to this med, and many users get fed up with not being able to drink after a while and then try to drink after being off it for a day or so and the consequences are devestating.

There are much better alternatives with respect to medication therapy for alcoholics. Many doctors would just as soon send some body to inpatient rehab in lieu of Antabuse. If somebody can't control their drinking naturally, how are they going to control it while on a medication that stops metabolism of alcohol once it turns into acytelaldehyde? Essentially, many Antabuse users end up embalming themselves in a moment of weakness.

If aversion therapy had a high success rate than many addicts wouldn't have to go inpatient as the consequences of an addictive lifestyle would be sufficient for them to just quit, which obviously isn't the case. Also, a month of treatment on a medication isn't going to resolve the problem or stop the behaviour, and long term use of Antabuse isn't an option because it is so hard on the body. Normally I don't vilify medications, but I'm not going to sugar coat Antabuse and hope for the best when statistics substantiate my concerns. The trend in modern medicine is moving a way from prescribing this medication as it tends to be devestating and ineffective.

ETA: Rhe most effective treatment in alcoholism is to address the underlying motivations to drink/ often addiction is merely a symptom of a larger issue - the addict self medicates to eliminate pain from another source. It's much easier to get sober and healthy once that larger issue is addressed.

I stand behind what I said. Two differing opinions.

 

[herbavore]

I think that the advice to stay in the present is the best advice. You don't really know what the future holds at 23 (or at 83 for that matter). If you can shift your focus from the future continually back to "now" it will help you gain the self-awareness that is the best tool in the human tool belt. The future is a big question mark. You might want to check out Smart Recovery for an approach that does not focus as much on "forever". For some, accepting that "forever" is key to their recovery but for others it is something that can undermine recovery. Recovery is what is important and how you get there is a balance between current medical and psychological knowledge and your own knowledge of your developing and changing self.

 

[Moreaux]

I stand behind what I said. Two differing opinions.

Fair enough, no issue with differing opinions. All aspects of a medication should be considered, and just because an adverse effect had not presented yet doesn't mean it won't present in the future. Alternatitively, at no point did I recommend that they just stop the medication, so implying as much is unfair. They are obviously working with a doctor, and presenting more options to discuss with their doctor givens them more choices/tools to better ensure that they are successful. I felt as though you were attempting to invalidate my response by putting words in my mouth which isn't fitting for a harm reduction site, as the dangers of Antabuse are very real and should absolutely be discussed. Also, many people gain benefit from sharing experiences with others who have been in their position, which I have not only as an addict but as a long term binge drinker. In briefly reviewing your previous posts I see that you have issues with opiates, while yes it is an addiction it is not binge drinking which comes with its own unique circumstances.

Doctors are not infallible and we do not know what type of Doctor wrote him the script to Anatbuse. Some general physicians will prescribe addiction medication with having very little knowledge or experience with it, which in the case of Antabuse, can be dangerous. By mentioning potentially dangerous effects of Antabuse the OP has more knowledge, and if it concerns him he can discuss these concerns with his doctor. He can also discuss alternatives in case he was in aware. If you read through this site enough you will see several instances of people asking their GP for a medication because they think it will help them, and the GP will go along with that, and then later they have issues which usually compels them to post on Bluelight. It is important for people to be proactive in their recovery and educated in medications and treatment options so they can have meaningful discussions with their doctors.

Often there is also a misconception that users can slip and have a couple of drinks and they may experience unpleseantness and vomiting, which is far from the case when drinking on Antabuse. Stopping breathing when drinking on Antabuse is common when you are referring to a subpopulation of alcoholics who binge drink as binge drinkers aren't exactly known for sipping thier drinks slowly over the course of hours. It actually doesn't take a large amount of time to consume the right number of drinks to have a severe Antabuse response.

It is also widely known that just stopping the substance does not necessarily resolve the addiction, as frequently there are underlying issues motivating the use. If those issues aren't addressed, then chances are much higher to get caught in a relapse cycle, which with alcohol can be devastating as alcohol withdrawal has a kindling effect. Other safer medications for alcoholism are available that block the desire to drink and buy the patient time to work on those underlying issues without the constant harassment of cravings distracting them from making progress on those other issues.

Also, the OP is asking about drinking in the future, which indicates the medication is only preventing him from drinking, it is not helping the underlying issue or the addiction. Something more needs to be done, and I think the missing piece comes in the form of therapy to work on the underlying issues while he is dry.

 

[Moreaux]

LemonadeShower - you also said you are having issues with anxiety. I know that topirimate can increase anxiety. I was in that for four months and it was also a difficult medication - make certain you drink a lot of water through out the day and force yourself to eat. Is propranolol available in your area? It's a nonaddictive beta blocker that helps tremendously with anxiety. It was a life saver to me in early recovery. I was also ask about naltrexone - it's the same chemical as Vivitrol but it's a pill and may be much less expensive and available to you. If you're not doing so already, I strongly recommend that you see a therapist and also look into Cognitive Behavioural Therapy as that is very effective for anxiety management. Feel free to pm me with questions, I was a horrible binge drinker and struggled for seven years to get sober. It is difficult at first, but it gets so much easier. Something that also helped me when I would have cravings is to eat something high in sugar when a craving hits. I realize you probably don't have much of an appetite from the topirimate, but force yourself to have a tall glass of juice or candy during a craving. The sugar will help make it go away. Good luck!

 

[LemonadeShower]

LemonadeShower - you also said you are having issues with anxiety. I know that topirimate can increase anxiety. I was in that for four months and it was also a difficult medication - make certain you drink a lot of water through out the day and force yourself to eat. Is propranolol available in your area? It's a nonaddictive beta blocker that helps tremendously with anxiety. It was a life saver to me in early recovery. I was also ask about naltrexone - it's the same chemical as Vivitrol but it's a pill and may be much less expensive and available to you. If you're not doing so already, I strongly recommend that you see a therapist and also look into Cognitive Behavioural Therapy as that is very effective for anxiety management. Feel free to pm me with questions, I was a horrible binge drinker and struggled for seven years to get sober. It is difficult at first, but it gets so much easier. Something that also helped me when I would have cravings is to eat something high in sugar when a craving hits. I realize you probably don't have much of an appetite from the topirimate, but force yourself to have a tall glass of juice or candy during a craving. The sugar will help make it go away. Good luck!

Thanks everyone. The doctor I'm seeing is a psychiatry. I've been going every 2 or 3 months for the last 4 years. Not always because of alcohol, he used to treat me first for a psychotic episode due to heavy marijuana + other substances abuse (I'm skeptic it was the weed, but I did have the paranoid thoughts). He gave me seroquel.

I was also prescribed Zoloft (sertraline) by him to handle depression and anxiety issues. Yeah, I've been coming on and off depression and anxiety since I was 16 or so. The shrinks always said that it might be secondary to the drugs since I was always using marijuana. And perhaps they were right. Maybe the weed + alcohol did mess up my brain. So in 5 years I went from one shrink to another, they gave me different meds for my depression/anxiety and finally the breaking point was the brief psychotic episode I had in which I had to take seroquel.

My current psychiatrist, the one which whom I take the appointments now, also shares a similar diagnose with the previous ones. That he can't say weather or not I have a mental illness previous to my drug abuse because the drugs by themself (including booze of course) can cause all of the symptoms from such illnesses, including psychosis.

And that's how I endep up on Antabuse. After years of smoking pot with my high school buddies, then trying some other stupid things like cough syrup, and eventually locking myself in my room onto the numbness of alcohol.

Btw, I know propanolol is available because my dad took it for his heart arrhythmia. Idk about naltrexone.

 

[Moreaux]

Zoloft helped me for a while with depression and anxiety, how long have you been taking it? Be very careful not to drink alcohol on it, strangely drinking on Zoloft seems to make the alcoholism worse in many people. I found that to be the case for me and when I queried the Internet I found that Zoloft affected many other people's alcoholism as well.

Once you've been sober for a while they will be able to tell if your mental health issues are natural or drug induced. Do you do any kind of therapy? I found Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) very helpful to learn how to deal with depression and anxiety in a productive manner instead of using substance to self medicate. It takes time to learn and practice but it can make a significant difference. If you're not doing something like that now you may want to look into to it while you're not actively drinking. CBT allowed me to get a handle on my issues, it did take a couple of years, but I have been able to stay off of medication and recreational substances. I was a horrible alcoholic for 17 years and previously struggled for almost a decade to quit. You really should consider having a plan in place for dealing with life and cravings when you do stop the Antabuse.

I checked online and apparently naltrexone is available in Peru. I found it really helps reduce cravings so definately talk to your doctor about it. It's great that you're working on this issue while you are still young - you have a good chance of beating this thing and leading a happy, healthy, productive life.