Misc My psychotropic medication

[Iosif Stalin]

I was prescribed the following medication for anxiety, insomnia and depresión:

Alprazolam 2 mg every 8 hours
Clorazepate 10 mg every 12 hours
Pregabalin 75 mg every 8 hours
Gabapentin 300 mg every 12 hours
Sertraline 100 mg every 12 hours
Clotiapine 40 mg every 24 hours

In addition I have 50 mg clorazepate pills, 10 mg clobazam pills and 30 mg flurazepam capas

What you think about these psychoactives?

 

[jammin83]

Good lord man. You are in for some rough days when you quit pretty much any of those. Quite a few redundancies.

You must be a walking basket case.

 

[Iosif Stalin]

That's all I have prescribed in my electronic prescription by different doctors at different times but not nearly took all that, it's just what I'm allowed to remove from the pharmacy. Here it's 9:40 pm and today I hace not taken any benzo or anxiolytic of any kind, I've just taken sertraline and my methadone and I'm fine

 

[neurotic]

that's a shit ton of downers. use with lots of parsimony or not at all... if you have depression / anxiety it's easy to get a psychological fixation on these, IME.

 

[Pharmosis]

Sertraline is an outstanding antidepressant. For me, 50mg per day is amazing for melancholic depression, severe OCD and social anxiety disorder; it's easily the most effective SSRI I have used. In your shoes, I would ask my psychiatrist to remove everything except the sertraline and alprazolam; for your diagnoses, the other medications seem superfluous to me.

 

[SKR]

^agreed. And sertraline saved my life and others lives too, I was mental with anxiety, depression and panic attacks and sertraline set me straight the day I started it. As the drug built up in my system over the proceeding week or two I got even better.

 

[manboychef]

i take sertraline and that has been a godsend for me as well. I tried so many other antidepressants and they just ended up making me crazier so to speak. I actually laugh and enjoy life again.

 

[tacodude]

Yea deffinitely don't become dependent on all that.... I am sure you get what I am saying as you're on methadone.

 

[Rio Fantastic]

I was prescribed the following medication for anxiety, insomnia and depresión:

Alprazolam 2 mg every 8 hours
Clorazepate 10 mg every 12 hours
Pregabalin 75 mg every 8 hours
Gabapentin 300 mg every 12 hours
Sertraline 100 mg every 12 hours
Clotiapine 40 mg every 24 hours

In addition I have 50 mg clorazepate pills, 10 mg clobazam pills and 30 mg flurazepam capas

What you think about these psychoactives?

I'm not 100% sure what you're asking here - are you asking if they have any recreational value, if we think they're effective for your conditions, what our experiences are of them, or just totally generally our broad thoughts on the drugs themselves? Generally speaking however:

Alprazolam: Good ol' Xanax. I'm not inclined to anxiety, at all, so I don't really find any recreational value in any benzodiazepine, but if I'm feeling really unduly stressed or want to knock myself out then I'd probably choose either Xanax or Temazapam. Short, fast acting, reasonably strong and decent as benzos go. Godsend on a stimulant comedown.

Clorazepate: Another benzo, but one I have no personal experience with.

Pregablin: Some people can get high off it, personally it can make me a little relaxed/sedated for a day or so, then it seems to lose all effect. Useful for heroin withdrawal, though.

Gabapentin: Same as above but milder.

Sertraline: SSRI. Lots of people talk shit about antidepressants, and although due to their side effects I definitely think that people should give a healthy diet and exercise a go first (an entire THIRD of people with depression respond amazingly well to this, which I think is an incredible statistic, and yet so many people would rather pop a pill than get on a treadmill....), I have also seen similar drugs work miracles on depressed people, I have literally seen people totally totally have their life transformed for the better because of drugs like this. However, I have also seen it have no effect on people at all, myself included. Take that as you will.

Clotiapine: Fucking POISON. If you are not severely psychotic, IMMEDIATELY STOP THIS MEDICATION. Fucking HORRIBLE side effects, honestly, these meds turn people into fucking SOULLESS ZOMBIES. They will DRAIN THE LIFE OUT OF YOU. A TERRIBLE TERRIBLE treatment for depression, and possibly the worst med a depressed person could be taking. Immediately flush them, honestly. The side effects can include SUDDEN DEATH (rare but honestly possible, I can google it for you if you're incredulous), PERMANENT MOVEMENT DISORDERS, SEIZURES and they have been found with long term use to shrink the brain's grey matter and permanently lower your IQ. I'm not being hysterical, you can google all of this and find actual studies backing it up. They can be extremely helpful if you're SEVERELY PSYCHOTIC, otherwise ditch it immediately. If you don't believe me just do a quick google search. All these terrible side effects for a drug that makes you sleep excessively, feel no emotion and lose all your spark and zest for life. Immediately stop if you value your health, brain or life.

Clorazepate, Flurazepam, Clobazam: Other benzos I haven't tried.

It's bizarre that you're prescribed 5 different kinds of benzo as well as both pregablin and gabapentin together, to the point where I'm highly doubting you got prescribed any of this, I think you've just somehow "acquired" a stash of prescription meds. If you aren't lying, then you're seriously over-medicated here. Go easy on the benzos, clueless doctors don't seem to have a problem letting their patients get hooked on benzodiazepines, so use them sparingly if you don't want to go through withdrawals that are horrible enough to rival the worst heroin withdrawal sickness, if I were you I'd only use them when you are suffering from really bad insomnia or terrible anxiety, relying on the benzos for either condition will just leave you worse off in the long run. People have described withdrawals from pregablin/gabapentin, but cases of it are rare enough that I don't think you need to be very concerned about it, as more people can stop and start as they wish with no issues than suffer with anything when they cease taking them. I'd continue the Sertraline, the discontinuation syndrome is mild and can be prevented by tapering, and if you are one of the lucky ones that respond well to SSRI therapy then it has the potential to help all three of your psychiatric complaints, but I'd definitely add good diet and exercise to give yourself a fighting chance to come out of your depression. Take the lyrica and gabapentin as prescribed, it's highly unlikely to do you any harm. Go easy on the benzos.

And for God's sake, if there is just ONE thing you take away from my entire post, it's STOP TAKING CLOTIAPINE. IT IS LITERALLY POISON. IT CAN KILL YOU. IT CAN SHRINK YOUR BRAIN. It is fucking HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE STUFF.

 

[Rio Fantastic]

Yea deffinitely don't become dependent on all that.... I am sure you get what I am saying as you're on methadone.

+1 to this. Also, I find life can be very unfulfilling when I am opiate maintenance therapy, whether it be methadone or subutex. Not enough opiates in me to feel good but just enough so that I am not experiencing my emotions properly, living in a haze not thick enough to make me feel high but without the clarity and drive that comes with sobriety. How long have you been on methadone, and have you considered tapering down and quitting?

 

[jammin83]

Rio I concur with much of what you are saying. However, do not underestimate gaba or lyrica. That shit can be fucked up. Some consider it worse than benzos. It can last for years.

The more you know...

 

[Rio Fantastic]

Rio I concur with much of what you are saying. However, do not underestimate gaba or lyrica. That shit can be fucked up. Some consider it worse than benzos. It can last for years.

The more you know...

Really? This is really, really surprising to me. Can you give me a link to any experiences or reports like you describe? Have you gone through it personally? I find the notion of a serious addiction to lyrica/gabs surprising enough, but the withdrawals actually being WORSE than BENZOS!?!? That I find almost unbelievable! Maybe I should do a little more research on the topic. However, I think that its safe to say that out of the big list of meds he's been prescribed, they're certainly the most benign of the bunch, as nobody can argue that, withdrawals from long-term use aside, that they're MORE addictive than benzodiazepines, so I figure if the dude has anxiety, depression & insomnia, and if using them means he uses less xanax or the other shitload of benzos his doctors have inexplicably given him, then I figure he should go for it. And anything is better than those fucking neuroleptics. Those fucking things should NEVER have been approved for anything other than truly severe schizophrenia, and I think the fact that they have other approved uses is just a testament to how corrupt the FDA are and how deep Big Pharma's pockets are.

 

[chrisincville]

i take sertraline and that has been a godsend for me as well. .

Same..my mental health is a lot better ever since I started on it..And it was the first med I tried.

And you're scripted both pregablin and gabapentin, OP?

Wish I could find a doc that would be willing to write that..I had heard of it before, but usually it's one or the other. Lately, I've been hearing the docs have the stance that the data they've seen shows neither trumps the other..hmm. That's rather subjective, IMO.

 

[tacodude]

+1 to this. Also, I find life can be very unfulfilling when I am opiate maintenance therapy, whether it be methadone or subutex. Not enough opiates in me to feel good but just enough so that I am not experiencing my emotions properly, living in a haze not thick enough to make me feel high but without the clarity and drive that comes with sobriety. How long have you been on methadone, and have you considered tapering down and quitting?

I know you're not asking me, but 1 day 20 mg (suprisingly ok eight hours in). Already a client at the clinic told me to run! they thought it be a miracle now it is even worse as if I didn't already know. It is either this or crippling pain though.

Rio I concur with much of what you are saying. However, do not underestimate gaba or lyrica. That shit can be fucked up. Some consider it worse than benzos. It can last for years.


The more you know...

Gabapentin fucked up my cognative ability litterally causing me to need five seconds each word stringing a sentance together leaving me misrible as it was for pain it helped, but left me cutting my wrists as on it I was miserable and off it I was worse in a way opiate w/d would be preferred.

 

[Rio Fantastic]

I know you're not asking me, but 1 day 20 mg (suprisingly ok eight hours in). Already a client at the clinic told me to run! they thought it be a miracle now it is even worse as if I didn't already know. It is either this or crippling pain though.

Are you saying you have some kind of chronic pain condition? That's all I gathered from this, you need to provide some context otherwise I have no idea what you're talking about dude.

Gabapentin fucked up my cognative ability litterally causing me to need five seconds each word stringing a sentance together leaving me misrible as it was for pain it helped, but left me cutting my wrists as on it I was miserable and off it I was worse in a way opiate w/d would be preferred.

What exactly have you been diagnosed with, in your life? What physical/psychiatric conditions? You can be honest, I'm not judging you here

 

[tacodude]

bear with me here

Winged shoulderblade from 2010 that was aloud to decondition instead of recieve real treatment as for the longest time I was not ever treated serriously for pain complaints as being an educated regular cannabis smoker that went medical after recieving two meth laced ounces after many dubs (Yes I know it was laced) realizing I can not rely on a street market for something becoming more obviously apperently needed daily for what was diagnosed as essential muscle tremors in r/l forearm that has become worse after having unknowingly successfully masked it for years until life complications affected my income creating instability for the first time in a long time, which has been part of whats led to my 5+ years of hell that the incident with the winged shoulderblade was near the begining of the hell of seeking pain management in a smaller famous city where drug use is so prevalent and diversion is so common a street is known for buying pills right off the main market st. leaving most doctors not only afraid of management of pain with opiates, but very discriminatory of those who use opiates even if prescribed for pain where the general attitude is "I am older and my pain is worse and I am fine without medication. You're just being a child not dealing with it, blah blah blah dismiss, judge, insult, defend and rationalize destructive critisism, ignore patient as long as possible while taking as long as possible to do as little as possible constantly reminding them that a doctors office/ER is busy and isn't there to cater to every whim to every request even if only one every half hour at most always with excuse me, please, and thank you as if I am rude, unnappreciative, and ignorant to the ammount of work they do. Yet benzos are given out like candy especially to an opiate addict in hope to change the addiction from a reletively safe dependency to one of the most dangerous in terms of utalization of the medication, dependancy factor, and withdrawal dangers esp. fatal. I even ended up in the hospital under a forced psych hold after my parents lied to emergency stating I was hurting myself, stating intent on killing myself, on drugs who knows what besides medical cannabis, and violent and out of control when in reality it was the other way around as I came to the family house, granted screaming and frustrated, but asking what should I do, go live on my own or continue with them? Do I have support to live or not? After just staring at me like I was crazy I was angry hurting my hand getting tense squeezing my keys leading me losing myself a bit throwing them across the room, but aimed at a cardboard box knowing nothing would be damaged or anyone hurt only for them to give me a dirty look that left me so mad that I needed to kick an empty box as I vented frustration usually not in charecter around others although it was a challenging time and at the time I kicked the box my mom made that an exuse of evidence of self harm while my father decided to record me for claimed evidence, but to rub in my face as if I was out of my mind unable to recall the night in the future. I idiotically gave them the opportunity and somewhat excuse to grab and get me in the air although it was as if they planned and prodded me into it as they were sick of my drug use that was psychedelic on occasion mainly mushrooms and the like and moderately heavy cannibis that compared to my use nowadays my parents would beg for now seeing what forcing me out of the saftey of their house and onto the street for behavoir issues they blamed on my drug use, but in reality was due to a lack of emotional understanding largly part due to them both dealing with it even in old age.

Anyways after reaching for the phone to confirm he was recording even though he denied it with the hope of deleting the recording and returning the phone where he said he feared me breaking it so he had to grab me as soon as he drew me in really close as if it was premeditated so my brother then grabbed around my head and neck, they lifted me, carried me back down into the room, looked at one another clueless, and from 3.5-4 ft dropped me where my shoulderblade landed on the corner of a bin or vacuum cleaner handle (it was cluttered) realizing after being hurt I was in physical danger I made a bolt to the door to try to return to my room at my grandfathers, calm down, regroup my thoughs, and learn how to leave my family. They claimed I was stating plans to kill myself knowing it would force me into the hospital where I would be forced off cannabis and anything else knowing I had started opiates due to a really shitty psychiatrist I was trying to have do psycotherapy and general mental health care only for him to tell my parents talkings pointless as I won't take his drugs so I need to be sent to a program not even giving me a chance to talk insulting me claiming all my points were useless ramblings even though I was bringing up undiagnosed pain and how I wanted help seeing a doctor, but needed to have my parents work with me without refusing supporting any medication claiming my medical cannibis use at that point made me a general drug seeking drug addict that shouldn't even smoke cannibis ever only for him to tell them I started using opiates without my knowledge leading to them cutting off support I relied on to be stable as I built a reputation in the workplace as I really had none leading to the freakout they manipulated to have me hospitalized where my shoulder was injured as well as my right leg is perma fucked after I was forcibly injected with 5 mg haldol in my right glute in the wrong lower outer vs upper quadrant of the glute I believe causing it to land into a nerve cluster leading to near lethal effects and the real return of suicidal desire, ideation, and later on in the months leading to attempts that have gradually progressed into more serrious acts (head banging, wrist cutting attempts, standing on ledges, and finally walking into traffic) as well as causing chronic pain in kneecap shooting up outer leg to glute where a tense knot is between the glute and leg that none of which exist on the left. All because I was agitated yelling for an understanding of care for my situation, refusal of ativan obviously as they assumed that I was tripping balls and not just 6 hours from the last cannibis bowl using my history of use and admittedly using something two days before when I had time in hopes they understood it was not drug issues at all like my parents made huge effort to focus on in hopes that my cannibis smoking would be attacked as a drug addiction that needed to stop. My parents litterally destroyed my life that night as I have never recovered from the trauma and only have developed more including rape this recent January part of the reason I was hit by the car and happened only due to imparing my judgement attempting to kill myself. Even still no one will give the drug use being innapropriete addiction only leaving me miserable being the only reason I am on methadone, but I am beyond miserable for being forced in this position as I was refused to be weened off my meds after my doctor retired and only had a week to ween off what I was on due to mistaking by a month his departure. I really feel misrable as I can't help think I will never accomplish anything in life as no one will treat me as human deserving equal rights and instead a drug addict as I ate candy a lot as a child then smoked pot starting at 16 so I must be refused the same level of care a normal non drug using human would get. Really I would rather be in a holocaust concentration camp suffering with the other fellow jews. At least I would not be so alone suffering and it would be quick vs. the suffering I face now alone surrounded by people suffering exactly the same yet feeling alone as well because they are afraid to admit it. I am just so tired of everything.... Some days I just want to fall to the ground hoping I will be dead or at least unconcious as everything is to much, my head then becomes overwhelmed, and I end up dizzy, faint, and with the worst severe suttle headache yet know I can't and even if I was laying there maybe one out of one hundred would come help.

I even had a nurse station laugh at me after I announced, "Goodbye!, Goodbye! I am going to kill myself," leading to their laughter behind me although clearly the nurse station area only, leading to me hitting my head, and walking out to get hit by a car going 30-40 without anyone making effort to stop me after I came because I was in pain and withdrawing after my doctor was suppused to put a script in for me to pick up, but due to his minimal effort he didn't catch a computer error leaving me without any medication for the weekend yet still the ER doctor refused to treat me on the grounds he wouldn't give me narcotics even though I specifically said deal with pain and expected withdrawal from prescribed opiates with or without narcotics until I could see my doctor the end of the weekend when open monday even though I explained I had my family call from the east coast to ask my doctor to make sure I am safe and not without medication as I end up developing suicidal ideation easy at this point when pain and w/d hits and I am not as strong as I expect only for the doctor to ask me why I didn't deal with the problem the day before leading me to explain again how I had only for him to repeat the second time I am not giving you narcotics wait to see your doctor giving me only 3 sentances before walking out on me as if I was begging for narcotics without any reason to use besides getting high when I begged him to deal with my chronic pain that was becoming worse as for reasons unknown at the time the prescription that shoukd have been availible was not and since my doctor waited until the end of the day no one besides him could resend it at the office forcing me to wait from friday to monday when I was dependent on the opiates for pain. I had not been treated for any possible issues with the car and have not been off opiates until now so this is the first I notice I can't sit up in the morning due to my lower back pain and struggle like a 75 yo man at the age of 24. My pain will only get worse growing without me being able to successfully complete physical therapy and strengthening excersize yet without pain management I lose motivation as the pain gets worse before better only to end up stopping me leading to issues deconditioning while I am constantly allowed then denied pain management due to addiction and diversion concerns even with clean urine tests, a treatment plan in place, and real effort on my part to follow through only to be cut off after my doctor retired on the excuse it is not cancer pain.

As you can guess I have had an attempt to have almost every diagnosis placed on me, but the only one that seemed right is an ASP (Aspergers spectrum disordet). I find I am more sensitive in the sense of sight, hearing, and touch. Before cannibis eye contact and verbal communication was a challenge as well as I hated to be touched and utalized many self soothing techniques I recognized in the Temple Grandin movie watching it last Oct during a class at school. Really though because I am so knowledgable and well spoken, albeit a little pressured and rushed, that most "professionals" think I am fine, but do not know how to help as there are no resources..... I have tried many ways to acknowledge the pain and a collection of three treatments along with excercise guided by PT is the only way to treat it, but I am in too much pain to go through it as I have made my best effort to many times over to fail due to overwhelming pain or w/d due to unprofessional doctors cutting me cold turkey after starting me. Bassically I can not get help as none is availible even in a city supposedly with great resources, medicare abd primare and state insurance secondary leaving me with nothing. So I am throwing my life away giving up and accepting methadone to maintain while I get whatever to shoot for breakthrough..... Yea shooting is no goid, but fuck it after all the damage continuing to be done due to unresolved rape, credit theift, illegal unconstitutional abuse by police during mental health crisis, and so much more a opiate injection is not going to even compare to the damage all that continues to do as more problems seem to develop making effort to get help. I really just give up at least until my treatment changes.

Edit: That is enough info right? I appologize for tangents and run ons.

Edit 2: I reside in the states not the UK...... Healthcare here is amazing if you can find a provider who doesn't give you the runaround.

 

[manboychef]

wow that is intense taco dude. I seriously hate our medical healthcare in the US. I am fortunate I found a good doctor...he actually treats most of my family, so he knows all of us.

I am prescribed multiple benzos a day, but I only take the temazepam daily. If I need it, I have 3 .5mg xanax I can take a day. Most times I don't need it though, because I amlearning to deal with the anxiety, panic, and OCD through non chemical means.

You gotta explain the credit theft taco dude. Illegal abuse by cop is par for the course.

 

[tacodude]

Fell in love with someone who at some point within six months after spending every second together we could living in a shelter next to one anothers bed truly falling in love to the point we discussed serriously having a future togeth ang getting married, and after reducing my security around them they offered to help me open credit as I never have not wanting to ever build debt promising to pay off eveything in the end to help us out by giving us spending money and helping me build credit as well as opening phone plans only to abandon me to marry someone supposedly to help with housing to part so we could wed after they went off to serve, but they were rejected or just gave up happy with the new situation. In the end they opened multiple credit after as much as they could refusing to let me use it knowing I had a check in two days to cover what was spent. Then I just never got around to reporting them to the police as I still can't help love them even though I am so mad at them Part of the reason of not reporting is also a history of mistreatment by the police and fear of pursuing it only for a court to side with them on not being responsible and my beliefs being due to my delusional nature they tried to represent me as to discredit me as they know how to document everything and how to twist evidence to make me look like a crazy stalker when the most I harrassed was persisting on trying to get them to set up time to talk about resolving all the credit damage where initially the response would be later, tired shutting the door using a sign saying no one should knock is reason to say I am harrassing when I knock after they close the door saying we will talk later both of us knowing full well there was no intebtion then they would come out huffing and puffing to scare me and say I am the one hurting the other as I made them angry as if they had nothing to do with my depression by lying about being with me forever friend or partner if I ever decided where now I do not even know if they are in the same state or across the country and usually the next step would be them saying that we will go to my room to talk usually turning into a beat up session on me partly due to him being a monster, but also getting on and off abilify and prozac I believe more the later. Just the way they could beat me up yet afterwords cry and hold me like no one ever has, the only physical contact I desired, and with their full emotion and heart.... Honestly I do not know if they intended to never pay things off or not from the start, but after marrying the other it seems they planned it at that point either because it was their idea or the new partner. Either way I will never be foolish enough to fall in love again. I realize now it is fiction only found in movies and stories while real life people partner with one another for personal gain only.... Selfless people are quite uncommon.

Edit: The cop abuse was cruel and unusual punishment essentially torture by using me yelling ow as my wrist is being twisted to the point any further would break it while tightening the handcuffs extremely before releasing where 6 200 lb+ police officers tackled 130 lb, homeless, malnourished, exhausted, etc to a stretcher takung their sweet time tieing me in with each officer digging a knee in me up and down my body litterally bringing me to reach out and try to just squeeze the EMT hand like pregnant woman do as I was so shocked by the sudden burst of unbearable pain after being realitively quiet even being left hanging out of the cop car arched and handcuffed as they left me like that after dragging me to their car because I went limp as they decided to handcuff me as they forced me in then do things like drop into my shoulder with their knee and make the cuffs over excesively tight, drag me into the public transit train track I was waiting for to get to my friends who told me to come stay with him as I wanted to end my life that night if I had to spend it sleeping on the night bus, making comments how I was a bad person putting the cops in danger not getting out of the tracks they dragged me in where the train can be seen comming and would see us and stop before hitting anyone even with the sun down, leading to me hitting my head trying to break my skull hopefully piercing my brain ending it, having a cop say he would kill me himself as I was saying how I wanted to kill myself while another was pulling my hair trying to stop me leaving me hanging with my head side halfway out where all I did after calming down was ask to be sat up and why it was taking so long to leave where they sarcastically said that they had to wait for an ambulance as I was hurting myself, which many other times with the same conditions had not led to an ambulance. It seemed more of a way to mess with me.... Litterally they had 3 cop cars and told my father who hunted me down with them, but was told to leave around the time they handcuffed me and dragged me to the car torturing me however they coukd until I was there. It really seemed like they were having more fun dealing with me while being creative and planning certain things like removing the handcuffs the way they did trying to incite a reaction via pain to say I was not cooperating and needed restraint in between the cop cars parked in a very odd way on a main road blocking off 3 of 4 lanes center to out keeping me in between the cars where there was no camera making the only evidence of their seemingly premeditated action to hurt me enough to get me to make a loud enough noise to claim a sign of violence or out of control behavoir only to have 7 guards and one EMT surround me and at 4 points feel excruciating pain that one can't help to squirm yet it would lead to them pressing harder with the excuse I am resisting even as I cried out in pain, "OW OW, PLEASE STOP, I AM NOT RESISTING, I AM COOPERATING, PLEASE STOP HURTING ME, AAAAAAAGHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA." Litterally I was tortured by the people who instead of putting my rapist on a sexual predator list accuse me of usingbthe police to get revenge because I was high seeking sex and didn't get what I wanted when instead my judgement was impared and I idiotically let someone accompany me to spend time in my room as we lived in the same building hoping to watch movies, music, games, cuddle at most, and just to get my mind of my physical pain and life stress only to just keep doing what they wanted to do as I just didn't want tto think about how I wanted to die yet am alive as my overdose attempt fail, I was not even high, and couldnt obtain any more to make another attempt while also accusing me of not cooperating with treatment as when he asked what my drug of choice was I didn't say something like "Painkillers because I forget all my problems, feel warm n fuzzy, and sleep all day," and responded I don't know how to answer that.... I would prefer not to choose drugs; I use cannibis medically for pain management, opiates prescribed for pain, and in the past psychedelics for introspective & spiritual reason although not lately because of life stress and mental instability while really I never got high on drugs just music and art. Serriously I live in an area great to move to and settle, but near impossible to grow up functional..... I am 24 and never driven a car and probably never will due to my back.

edit 2: Sorry for the thread hijack. I can get my stuff moved to my own dark side thread if thats prefered?

 

[chrisincville]

^^ WOW..you may consider splitting a post of that length up somehow next time? It's just hard to get thru when it's condensed like that. Or even make it a 2/3 part thing.

 

[tacodude]

^^ WOW..you may consider splitting a post of that length up somehow next time? It's just hard to get thru when it's condensed like that. Or even make it a 2/3 part thing.

Go fuck yourself.... It is hard enough to recall and condense five years of hell where I was raped in January..... Sorry it fucking hurts me to even think about this shit enough to write about it let along clearer than I did. You act as if there is no effort and say something rude as hell and offensive in response to a post describing as I said five years of hell related to chronic pain and medication troubles. Serriously chris you are a condecending attention whore asshole. If you do not like how I write my posts don't read them.... Litterally every post I make huge effort even to punctuate yet the one post that is not written perfect you hound me for. Way to reduce harm and not cause it you mother fucker.

I insult the way I do in this post in a way I would normally avoid, but you truly pissed me off chris so fuck you and the high horse you rode in on as it is not needed or wanted.