Stimulants My hell of post meth use

[weldonarchus]

So I find, 3 months post meth and coke use, that I can't rely on my 'intuition' (memory?) to give me good/accurate ideas/thoughts. If I try to riff on an idea, I just jumble my words/sentences and memories. It's fucking brutal for me- I relied on my fluid intelligence for my personality (not very social/confident) and career- and this manifests as rage, depression and bitterness. Ugh.

 

[Nurse Ratched]

So I find, 3 months post meth and coke use, that I can't rely on my 'intuition' (memory?) to give me good/accurate ideas/thoughts. If I try to riff on an idea, I just jumble my words/sentences and memories. It's fucking brutal for me- I relied on my fluid intelligence for my personality (not very social/confident) and career- and this manifests as rage, depression and bitterness. Ugh.

That sounds like you are in a shitty way right now. So 90 days off the shit. Good for you. I can't help 'cause I never did stims but I can tell ya that there are a lot of people on here in the same boat and they will come along eventually to try and give you some support. You workin? On any scripts for the symptoms?

 

[✿Dai₷y✿]

Some folk use Piracetam or similar nootropic type stuff and have a very healthy brain food diet.



Its going to be alright dont worry about it so much. I found using mirtazapine to sleep helped a fair bit and didn't have many issues off drugs, things ge really get better.

 

[Jabberwocky]

So I find, 3 months post meth and coke use, that I can't rely on my 'intuition' (memory?) to give me good/accurate ideas/thoughts. If I try to riff on an idea, I just jumble my words/sentences and memories. It's fucking brutal for me- I relied on my fluid intelligence for my personality (not very social/confident) and career- and this manifests as rage, depression and bitterness. Ugh.

Don’t worry, it will definitely get better. I gave IV coke a good bashing for a long time and was into industrial level meth use for quite some time. I took a four year break from all drugs and the first several months were very hard. I had emotional problems as well as cognitive problems. It was a big deal for me because I was trying to do a university degree as part of my recovery. I just concentrated on good eating and doing meditative type activities like yoga and swimming laps (every single day). Gradually my cognitive skills improved to the point where I finished my degree and got the highest score of the cohort.

I was about 45 when this happened, and I think age plays a role in recovery. My experience was that thinking skills come back faster than memory. My memory is still pretty average and I am a little bit challenged remembering new things when I try and study. I compensated for it by getting much better at making and using notes and reminders. I also am not as confident public speaking as I used to be as I don’t seem to be able to riff off my subject knowledge as well as I used to. It’s all there when I try and write but just not as accessible on-the-fly as it was. I compensate for that by reading my presentations more and developing a slower style of speaking as well as looking thoughtful rather than confused when I’m trying to recall something specific.

So basically, if you think a bit long term you’re definitely going to get better and there are lots of things you can do to speed up recovery and manage your performance in the meantime.

 

[Burnt Offerings]

Depending on how hard you went, it's not unusual for some people's recovery period to last a year. For some people who went especially hard on the shard, that's how long it takes to get the software back in working order

 

[weldonarchus]

Don’t worry, it will definitely get better. I gave IV coke a good bashing for a long time and was into industrial level meth use for quite some time. I took a four year break from all drugs and the first several months were very hard. I had emotional problems as well as cognitive problems. It was a big deal for me because I was trying to do a university degree as part of my recovery. I just concentrated on good eating and doing meditative type activities like yoga and swimming laps (every single day). Gradually my cognitive skills improved to the point where I finished my degree and got the highest score of the cohort.

I was about 45 when this happened, and I think age plays a role in recovery. My experience was that thinking skills come back faster than memory. My memory is still pretty average and I am a little bit challenged remembering new things when I try and study. I compensated for it by getting much better at making and using notes and reminders. I also am not as confident public speaking as I used to be as I don’t seem to be able to riff off my subject knowledge as well as I used to. It’s all there when I try and write but just not as accessible on-the-fly as it was. I compensate for that by reading my presentations more and developing a slower style of speaking as well as looking thoughtful rather than confused when I’m trying to recall something specific.

So basically, if you think a bit long term you’re definitely going to get better and there are lots of things you can do to speed up recovery and manage your performance in the meantime.

Thanks for the input peeps, it really fills a void just hearing related stories.
I was snorting both drugs almost every week for the better part of 5 years and they were sometimes pretty hard binges. I think binging isolated vs socially strongly affects the outcome of the effect on you- I was an isolated user mainly interacting with people online. I feel like I have been jumbled and spat out raw- that my honours degree was all for nought- I quit my PhD scholarship because of my addiction and related loneliness, isolation and general inability to be who I was before using, and do the degree.
Now living in a new city at 35, I still have issues I had before using obviously- and now this big ripe scary pendulum hanging over my head ticking away to when I might use again when I overstress and cave in. It's been 3 months, I hope to last another 40 years without using? and make that time fruitful, relaxed, peaceful? Fucking hell!
Part of me feels that focusing on negatives makes them a reality- and that otherwise, you may be capable of changing massively but I actively remember awful comedowns daily to remember why not to use when I get cravings.
Atelier I really resonate with your post man. I try to ride my bike, do pullups and do laps 3-4x a week. I hope to be a more active part of this community once I step off being so self obsessed with my current situation.

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

Part of me feels that focusing on negatives makes them a reality- and that otherwise, you may be capable of changing massively but I actively remember awful comedowns daily to remember why not to use when I get cravings.

I'm feeling wobbly in my own stim recovery last couple of weeks and it's the above that seems to be helping the most in keeping me off them right now, keeping in awareness the 99% chance that It would be a whole week of devastating regret and self loathing in exchange for the small number of hours feeling 'ok'

You sound like you're engaging honestly with yourself regarding your recovery, which I think is crucial and bodes well, all the best