My dreams and life goals.

[PMS]

I want to build my own house, a couple of miles right by a river. A simple construction built to last atleast 200 years, with everything one would need to live a timeless life. Wood stove, a bed, a storage chest, firewood stove, writing/work desk. Much better than any apartment. No electricity bills or other problems, will be very cheap in the long run. Also very healthy if you ask Me.

I want to grow long hair, a beard, and accept that I will forever be addicted to tobacco, speed and amphetamines. Write books about off-topic- themes like occultism, drug use, living in the woods, and otherwise gain money from welfare (I am a diagnosed Paranoid Shizophrenic".


And the cat that lives with my neighbor completely agrees with these ideas. She knows what a human being is made for, and why we have problems with todays society.

First I need to purchase some of the forest where I plan to live and harvest firewood. Then I must build one story of my house/cabin so I can live there until I start expanding. My plan is to have four stories with a cellar and a flat roof for obeseving stars in the winter, and BBQ'ing in the summer.



Anyone with me on this crazy idea. I will not accept living in this made-up shitty society for the rest of my life, it is so shit that suicide seems like a viable option. And that's not OK.

 

[Psyduck]

I will not accept living in this made-up shitty society for the rest of my life, it is so shit that suicide seems like a viable option. And that's not OK.

Basic psychology lesson:

*society* *the people* *they* *modern culture* *ordinary people*

These concepts are all empty. Most of the time the Ego uses these concepts to project their own problems, or to construct a counter-identity (which defines their own self-image). You have the slightest idea what the Universe is like, and cannot judge the infinite variety of people.

Hiding in a forest seems a bad idea (especially for someone diagnosed as "Paranoid schizophrenic"). Try to integrate yourself in society. This may be a slow process, but the interpersonal relationships you shall develop will give you much more meaning than hiding in a forest ever will.

 

[Kittycat5]

So he should integrate into an empty concept? There is no such thing as integrating into a soceity at whole. Make bonds with individuals,PMS, and to hell with soceity.

 

[Psyduck]

^ ok, yes... I was not accurate

but I wanted to distinguished between society="name for everything that is bad" and society="a name for the totality of people" Either way, I think the most valuable thing to do is connecting with other people.

 

[What 23]

But I completely resonate with wanting to escape the bullshit that we seem to catch ourselves up in, in this warzone we call "society"... Not that there is not society, and not that war doesn't exist in some forms, always, but this consumer wasteland gets tiring.

I've thought about doing this, and how hard it is to really disconnect from the government. People always want to know what people are up to. People are afraid. People don't know. I understand this. But I really want to sometimes just go raise chickens and hemp by a clean river source, with like minds, living without all the extraneous stuff we don't really need. Much of my problems stem from my inability to deal with the world as it has become. Paints make me sick, new constructions. I have MCS. I am never bothered so much in the middle of "nature". I can trace just about every problem I have back to uncleanliness of "others" (toxic chemicals). Things that I would have NEVER come up with on my own, or thought it safe to use around life. Granted, I probably wouldn't be solving differential equations (them thar), or taking our seeds to other planets, but I guess my children might, or my grandfather might have... But me personally, I just need fresh air, sun, clean water, no pesticides, no herbicides... My father was exposed to agent orange, and he smoked like a chimney, and we lived by a golf course where I played, and all around corn fields. I've gobbled down things, and my body has rejected them. I want out, and sometimes I wish the slate would be wiped clean... A massive breakdown, and die off of humans by some plague. I mean, do we really need this many hands, and mouths, and cars, and gas guzzlers? Can we sustain it? I hope so. I hope the ones who have allowed this, for this many people to survive without dying at 30, I hope they also have the ingenuity to not kill us.

"Society" as "them" might be "empty", but I do know that I would have never thought to come up with that stuff on my own. And if I would have, I would have been Amish about it. My sickness comes from things that have been "unnatural". But, I do like videogames... But, they only serve because I am not out adventuring into new territories, myself, physically. Most everything is known, or someone has laid claim to it, and you had better not cross the mighty governments with their big militaries and tanks. And I like driving fast, but I might never miss it. And, again, I wouldn't be the one to plow through, and take us to another planet (or what), and that is why I don't completely reject the way humans have gone. If we are to survive, we may need the tools to escape, one day, or at least escape our mess. Take control of the environment around us.

I know we are all tied, though. I don't mean to say, that I am not guilty of perpetuating unhealth. And that I am many ways like others. But I have recognized things, and I get your desire, PMS, to do these things... But, I do think you will need others, and there may be some balancing to find, for this to be in any way real. Maybe find a happy medium, and just slowly work toward something most resembling this goal? I have had dreams of starting communities, that have focuses on community farming, without machines, and chemicals. Converting cities to have internalized farms, and vast transportation systems that negate the need for cars, for the most part, or that integrate cars into a tram like system for most places. Green buildings, with hanging gardens/plantlife everywhere. I think I've seen that in articles, too. And there's on reason skyscrapers can't have some kind of solar paneling built in in places, and harness wind energy. And I've wondered if we might one day be able to redirect the energy that produces Earthquakes, and massive volcano eruptions eventually. I don't know. I don't know if that would have unforeseen consequences. Maybe just working to minimize damage, and preserve us, while at the same time greenifying things.

I guess to recant, as I will, I may have dreamed up some of the things. But I've been down a road. But the way out is through, if we have any chance. But in the smaller, individual world, if one can live off the grid such is proposed, this is pretty cool... Though I'd also work on not taking handouts, unless you plan on contributions back in forms. Maybe your books? Journals?

 

[Kittycat5]

That was a bit condescending on my part psyduck. Sorry for that, especially since you basically said the same thing as me.

 

[murphythecat]

So he should integrate into an empty concept? There is no such thing as integrating into a soceity at whole. Make bonds with individuals,PMS, and to hell with soceity.

exactly
op, go for it!
fuck society, it brings nothing but harm.
its a trap, a very dangerous one too.

 

[swilow]

PMS, your post history is why I will quit drugs, thanks mate.

you guys need to get HELP for methamp induced psychosis... in op's case that shit apparently turned into permanent http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paranoid_schizophrenia according to his psychiatrist... only warning you guys cause i can totally relate with OP's thoughts and posts... had it myself

meth.. not even once

I don't think these are especially helpful comments TBH.

 

[jetamine]

Fuck it man, go for it.