• Psychedelic Drugs Welcome Guest
    View threads about
    Posting RulesBluelight Rules
    PD's Best Threads Index
    Social ThreadSupport Bluelight
    Psychedelic Beginner's FAQ

MXE: My problem child

^That weird, manic, disconnected from reality feeling that taking it days in a row gives you is so... pleasurable. Honestly, I sometimes wish MXE could be my DOC, but that would be pretty destructive I realize. I think that altered daily reality is something many of us seek... and then proceed to create with MXE. We gotta keep our use under control guys. I always allow at least a week between doses these days, but even so... I find myself wanting it again throughout the week.
 
St3ve said:
Those who frequently (daily or as good as daily) use this drug seem to lose a certain connection to real life and get lost in some delirious fantasy world they've made up while under influence. It's a fantastic substance which is highly enjoyable, but I'd be very careful about using it too much. It has a sneaky psychologically addictive side to it that I'm only starting to experience now.
Click to expand...

This.. Its quite scary, it draws you somewhere out of this world. I think it makes some people very egoistic assholes after they've been sucked into that place. And it most certainly have after effects that aren't so wonderful. The afterglow is long gone and at least I get really apathetic, depressed mindstate for a while after binging with mxe. I love the stuff but somehow it's too hard to not use when you have it.
 
i can relate to your story Peacephrog1972 . I too fell in love with this drug and bought 10 grams "to store it"... same story, started using everyday... so I decided only to buy small amounts, never more than a gram, and always leave at least half a year between buyings
i agree it is very easy to get addicted to it, as it doesn't have the drawbacks or most obvious side-effects other drugs have... instead of a hang over, you just feel better and better... until it catches up with you... some people swears mxe abuse gave them kidney or other health problems

if I had read this during my initial 10grams period... i would probably have ended up writing something on the lines of what Meowfish here has written, which is a very passionate and charming rant i must say. And you might be right Meowfish, an addiction to mxe could be better than an adiction to heroin ... what do we know?
 
Well after reading that again all I can say is I'm sure MXE is better than sucking dick for heroin! Cudos for striking that!!
 
LoVE the stuff....; and am able to handle it way easier than K, used to do 1-3grams of K/day.... MXE is weighed out precisely, trip sitted, and the journey's are incredible, no fiendish redosing, and can keep MXE trips relatively far apart (i'm older now, got responsablities,andn shit "to do" ;-) innnit).... MUCH <3 and respect for MXE... and for all y'all reading this!!!
 
First, I would like to say that my FIRST experience with MXE since January 2014 was a WEEK ago in November.......Call that Addictive.

I had the Access and I had the Money - I chose NOT to use it, because it had Taught Me all that I NEEDED to learn at that point. I've been in a deep Depression. It Fixed that within the First Dose - Just like Ketamine.

I'm sorry for sounding like a Dick OP - but you REALLY don't know the capabilities that MXE has to Heal and Help a certain group of people who are mentally injured. BEFORE You choose to talk Shit - Learn what you're talking about. There are MASSIVE reports of how Dissociatives, not just MXE, have saved people from Addictions, Depression, and other Terrible Conditions. Learn Before You Speak. You are talking OUTSIDE of your bounds of Knowledge. Don't talk shit about what you don't KNOW.
 
Meow... I appreciate that you have had a good experience from MXE, I also have had good experiences with it. However it doesn't mean that people haven't had troubles with it. He does know what he's talking about - for him, MXE has been a problem. Where's the hostility coming from? You're coming across like an Evangelist.
 
It might be just my way of interpreting things, but I think I have observed in this and other forums what could be called "methoxetamine preaching syndrome" from certain type of posters. I'd love to make a proper research on this subject, to find out which personality type is more prone to such kind of syndrome

first time i noticed this was thanks to a guy called "EyesWideOpen"
 
cosmic._.ape said:
It might be just my way of interpreting things, but I think I have observed in this and other forums what could be called "methoxetamine preaching syndrome" from certain type of posters. I'd love to make a proper research on this subject, to find out which personality type is more prone to such kind of syndrome

first time i noticed this was thanks to a guy called "EyesWideOpen"
Click to expand...
I have noticed this phenomenon as well. I'd go further and say that these personalities are those who are particularly spiritual in non-conventional ways. I had a good friend who was oddly spiritual (as in he thought he could channel spirits and shit...) and he LOVES discos. He took DXM all the time when I knew him, and I saw it damage him, but he was always going on and on about his spiritual experiences on such drugs.

I mean, I love MXE a shit ton, but I certainly don't think it is anything like "the flesh of the gods" or anything; to me it's just a blast and sometimes helps me put my life into a greater picture. But then again... I think LSD is god manifested in physical form. So maybe we're all just a bit bonkers in our own ways, and disco-spiritualists are just another breed of drug using spiritual folk.
 
I will give you all my very simple and straightforward explanation.....I have absolutely no friends on this entire planet. After 30 years of life, I just don't relate to anyone that lives in the City that I live in. All people do is go to the Bar, get Piss Drunk, throw away tons of money on Alcohol, have meaningless, dangerous, one night stands, regret what they did in the morning, and then repeat the process the next day/weekend. I'm at an age where it's nearly impossible to make new friends.

MXE is my friend. I know that sounds fucked up - but I've lived a very Depressing life - not entirely of my own choosing. While everyone goes out and spreads STD's back and forth to one another - I explore the vast history of music that can be accessed nowadays, and I go on Journeys inside of my mind instead of doing what everyone else is doing. People have been very terrible to me in my life, and I am very distrusting - for good reason. That's the honest truth of why I appreciate MXE so much.

I just don't relate to people that are close to my age, especially where I'm located. I've spent most of my 30 years alone, with the exception of a few year stretch from 17-22 before I got addicted to Heroin. Once I had an actual Problem in my life - I found out that 99% of people aren't actually your friends...they're just there to get what they can from you, and I've always been a very giving and kind person.

I got really into Painting Graffiti, and eventually just gave up on trying to relate to people who don't want to know me. Where I live - It's Beer, Bitches, and Football. If you aren't a jock, you're a hippie, or a hipster. I've just kind of been outcast by my entire City - so I've created my own Universe of Entertainment via MXE. Where I live sucks - but I'm way too poor to have a shot at moving anywhere else, and my family doesn't even talk to me. I've made the best of a fucked up life. Sounds kind of sad when I type this out and share it with my fellow Bluelighters..................but I prefer to be honest with myself than front.

What would you do if that was your situation?
 
Last edited:
being honest and forthright is very appealing and genuine....not very many people take that approach, and i applaude you for it
 
If that were my situation, Meow, I'd move somewhere else. There are places in this country (in the US I mean, I don't know about places elsewhere to this degree as I've only lived in the US) where people congregate who are more non-conventional and would probably get along with you better. The town I live in is wonderful for this, almost everyone I meet I get along with and relate to because it's a bit of a mecca for people like us. Where I grew up, I always had a few close friends but by and large I didn't relate to people and they didn't relate to me. I moved 700 miles away from my family which sucks, but I am extremely grateful to have moved here because I feel like I belong finally, and it's made a huge difference in my life. :)
 
I live in one of the worst places in the United States - Ohio. I don't know what it is about where I live - but throughout my entire life - I've only had what I consider a REAL friend maybe 2-3 times, lasting at the longest 4 or 5 years. Part of it is there is basically no middle class here anymore, there are very Rich People and very poor people. There are a large number of Homeless People for the size of the City.

The younger generation is much more leaning Democratic and Liberal - but the State is Controlled by Republicans and Old People. The city is basically a huge ghetto with pockets around each side of the city that are very rich and being re-built and re-developed. The city is pushing people out of areas that used to be the ghetto, remodeling the buildings, and making them into Art Boutiques and High End Eateries. People here like to think they live in the New York / San Francisco of the Midwest. There is a very large Gay Community - which I have absolutely no problem with - but there is also still a LOT of underlying Homophobia, which makes it nearly impossible to start up a conversation with anyone other than a Female, because if you try and talk to another Male that looks or seems like someone that may be along the same wavelength as you - they think your Gay and trying to hit on them.

There is a large College - which is where a majority of the money in the city is generated from. If you're not into Football, you won't have common ground with a majority of the society here. People just have an arrogance about them - on top of that, there is an ENORMOUS Heroin, Methamphetamine, and Pain Pill scene. The Music scene is awful - it's either Jam Band Grateful Dead cover bands - or new school stupid bullshit radio rap like Lil Wayne, 2 Chainz. You can carry a concealed weapon into a Bar. When there is good Music to go out and see - 80-90% of the time, the crowd does not dance, does not move, and stands around the exterior areas of the venue, trying to look cool, chatting amongst each other - because being cool is not even acknowledging that the band, or artist that you paid to go and see is even playing. Don't get me wrong, I've seen some amazing shows here - but it honestly seemed like I was the only one having any fun.

I wish that I could move, but I haven't been able to find/hold a consistent job in over 5 years. I've been homeless off and on since I was 24 - I'm 30 now. Basically - the city is cliquey as FUCK, and if you aren't part of some crew, group, or genre - you don't have a place. The saddest thing is - there is a decent scene for some of the things I love - the only problem is, the people that are into what I like are fucking pretentious assholes. There is an enormous Party Scene, but it's either Jocks, Hippies or Hipsters - and everyone segregates themselves from one another.

I don't know - I just don't fit in with anyone here. I literally spend everyday just downloading music, listening to music - trying to learn about new and interesting things like Science, Chemistry, Music Theory - watching Documentaries about Interesting People and Topics. I go on long walks by myself through the city late at night by myself, or bike rides if I feel so inclined. I know this all really has nothing to do with this thread, but maybe in a way it does.

All of things that I just mentioned are why I appreciate MXE so much - it helps me not feel so alone, it helps me deal with the fact that all of the effort I've put into trying to make something out of my life and trying to be the best person that I can be just hasn't worked. I've just been an outsider and a Loner for so long, that people just see it in my eyes. I don't dress weird, have crazy tattoos or piercing - I'm just a normal, average looking guy, and I dress as such. The thing is about all of this - I'm not necessarily bothered by the fact that I have no friends. Every time I let someone into my life, male or female, they just try and see what they can get out of me. I've been robbed multiple times, been stopped and questioned by Police for riding my bike on a Sidewalk, been beat the fuck up and tazered by the Police for absolutely no reason................I could go on, but I won't. I just hope that people on here that may recognize my postings from time to time may have a better understanding of why I may seem crazy sometimes. I've just never learned Social Skills to an extent, and not in a way that I'm loud and obnoxious, or always say some weird out of line shit....I'm just quiet generally, soft spoken. I feel like I'm more just an observer of the Human Experience than actually taking part in it, and honestly, the way people act and live here - I don't want any part in.

So I just trip, and trip and trip. To be honest, I think I'm probably permanently tripping at this point. I've literally spent at least 3-4 years of my life on hallucinogenic or psychedelic compounds - mainly dissociatives, with tons of LSD, DMT, Mushrooms - although I don't care for them anymore, and occasional MDMA..........I don't know. I just don't really have a place in Society - and to a large extent, the way people act makes me not really want to be a part of the way Society currently is. I see so much Wealth and Waste on a daily basis - right next to dire extremes of poverty, homelessness, just people being forgotten and left behind by society because of an Economical Difference. It just disgusts me and makes me sad - so I just keep to Myself and try and work on who I am as a Human Being so that one day, when I meet the right people or person and find a place where I fit in - I'll be the best version of who I can be, and I'll be appreciated for that. If that never happens, so be it. At least I didn't take part in the Disgusting train wreck that is the Population where I live, and at the same time - I'll always keep fighting, trying to find a way to get out of this city, but for now - this is me, this is my life.
 
Disco-Spiritualist, I like the ring of that, self-descriptive for sure. I've been feeling for years that my spirit is entangled with it, and that I'm more spiritually addicted to MXE than any other form of addiction.

Meowfish I empathize with much of what you are saying, and understand where you are coming from. I agree you should make it number one priority to move to greener pastures where people are cool and not so shallow and darkly cunning like you find in capitalist-consumerist-dominated America.
 
Mr Meow... it might not help you immediately but just know that not everywhere is like that. If you can manage to, someday, move to Colorado or California (as MK said) or Asheville NC. Probably some other places too, mostly out west. Asheville has a lot of, as you put it, "hippies"... but it's an accepting bunch of interesting people who like all sorts of things.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top