SmokingAces
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2014
- Messages
- 2,301
Well, as some of you may or may not know about my personal situation recently, things have not been easy.
I sometimes come across rather crass on here. I know this is no excuse, but I've been looking after my uncle who has serious mental disabilities, aswell as now Alzheimer's.
I'm only 25 and this has weighed on my heavily, watching someone close to you deteriorate like that isn't easy for most people. I also have bipolar, and because of kidney issues I can't take the seroquel as it causes pain. So I'm basically under no medication to help.
Add that to my mother, who seems to be of the belief that this is my calling in life. She backs none of my dreams of becoming a personal trainer in a big UK City, despite the fact I'm fairly fit and know a lot about it. She wants us all to move to another country - with I'll uncle who can take 3-5 hours just to get out of bed to a state he is coherent in the morning, once I've changed him and everything else, while she is at work.
She can't understand why I'm so upset and that this is not what I wanted for my life personally. I got good grades in school. I've worked for HSBC, and I really do want a life for myself. Every girlfriend I've ever had she moans about them coming to "our" house, as this is her house basically.
She moans about me doing drugs (smoking weed, I try not to let on much else), yet once she's drunk asks me for a bud. Same stuff if she's sober she'll ask me to smoke outside because "it stinks the house out".
Today I finally realised. Even if I don't have much money. I should be happier than this, I've literally had ex girlfriends who were models. I've enjoyed parties in Ibiza with best of the best drugs. I've had jobs I loved. Yet I find myself here because I feel duty bound to help my uncle.
However there is no thanks. Because of his condition he lashes out at me. My mother (his sister) does very little to actually have anything to do with him. Instead my dad does the majority of it. I love my dad so much, he is my hero, he would do whatever he could for anyone who needed him because he is a kind man who never puts himself first. Yet I feel my mum takes advantage of this.
So... I've packed a suitcase. I have just under a thousand pounds and get paid every 2 weeks. Given the way this situation is effecting my mental health do you guys agree it's best I just look for a rented flat and move away? Try and find myself and get away from all of this which is clearly eating me up from the inside?
Many thanks
I sometimes come across rather crass on here. I know this is no excuse, but I've been looking after my uncle who has serious mental disabilities, aswell as now Alzheimer's.
I'm only 25 and this has weighed on my heavily, watching someone close to you deteriorate like that isn't easy for most people. I also have bipolar, and because of kidney issues I can't take the seroquel as it causes pain. So I'm basically under no medication to help.
Add that to my mother, who seems to be of the belief that this is my calling in life. She backs none of my dreams of becoming a personal trainer in a big UK City, despite the fact I'm fairly fit and know a lot about it. She wants us all to move to another country - with I'll uncle who can take 3-5 hours just to get out of bed to a state he is coherent in the morning, once I've changed him and everything else, while she is at work.
She can't understand why I'm so upset and that this is not what I wanted for my life personally. I got good grades in school. I've worked for HSBC, and I really do want a life for myself. Every girlfriend I've ever had she moans about them coming to "our" house, as this is her house basically.
She moans about me doing drugs (smoking weed, I try not to let on much else), yet once she's drunk asks me for a bud. Same stuff if she's sober she'll ask me to smoke outside because "it stinks the house out".
Today I finally realised. Even if I don't have much money. I should be happier than this, I've literally had ex girlfriends who were models. I've enjoyed parties in Ibiza with best of the best drugs. I've had jobs I loved. Yet I find myself here because I feel duty bound to help my uncle.
However there is no thanks. Because of his condition he lashes out at me. My mother (his sister) does very little to actually have anything to do with him. Instead my dad does the majority of it. I love my dad so much, he is my hero, he would do whatever he could for anyone who needed him because he is a kind man who never puts himself first. Yet I feel my mum takes advantage of this.
So... I've packed a suitcase. I have just under a thousand pounds and get paid every 2 weeks. Given the way this situation is effecting my mental health do you guys agree it's best I just look for a rented flat and move away? Try and find myself and get away from all of this which is clearly eating me up from the inside?
Many thanks
) then went and travelled the world. Came back after a few years and moved to Byron Bay. No regrets. Life well lived. Dreams chased and achieved. Now i am in another phase. Looking after my elderly parents. This is why i became a nurse. I am 44. Have lived, seen the world..had a lot of mad times. For me to be a carer to my parents at my age with my knowledge just makes sense. For you to be wasting the best years of your life not chasing your dreams makes no sense to me. Go for it brother. Its a fucking big world out there. Go see it. Become a PT...then go do it in New York...or wherever. You get what i am saying. Take the risk. In my experience you will always land on your feet if you are a good person.
