Missus Matt

[Runtoparadise]

Hi guys

Around ten years ago I moved to a new city.

Myself and my only child, a newborn. We had older family in the area, & I'd split with the deadbeat babydaddy prior to knowing I was expecting.

My next door neighbour & I began something..

Sweet child o mine is now nine, & despite a cpl of long term rships he knows nothing about, we've remained in touch over the years.

In the past twelve mths, we reconnected. I know he's still very much in love with me.. He's told me that he'll never love anyone as he does I.

I'm delighted to have him once again as a best friend/confidante, and sex has never come into the equation.

But I regard him as a BFF, I know it's not the same. I believe and know he'll be there thru thick nd thin, and to boot sweetchildofmine adores him.

We argued, about my pain tonight wtf right, then he slipped that he'd bought an engagement ring...

This came outta Nowhere, I guess I'd just like some opinion and experiences.

Rtp

 

[421]

Are you saying the problem is a lack of physical attraction?

 

[pofacedhoe]

yeah? whats the exact issue? make it crystal clear please

 

[421]

Whatever the issue is my advice is to be honest. Both to yourself and him.

 

[Runtoparadise]

Sorry, that post was was written in a haze of shock & disbelief, readers.

The issue is that I love this man as my dear friend, however our romantic r'ship ended at least eight years ago.

My understanding was that although he says he's never wavered in his feelings of love towards me, he long ago accepted that I didn't have any intention of returning his affections.

We are very close, speaking at least every day, & it's not unusual for him to camp on the couch. Our backgrounds are polar opposites, we don't share mutual friends, or even interests.

I, however keep a personal life that has involved two long term r'ships, and I'm currently dating someone. This I keep to myself out of respect to him, and the feelings he has divulged toward me, and would've thought he must have some lady friends at some stage.

So, when last night in a heated argument he asked if I wanted him to return the engagement ring to the jeweller, which led him to admit to planning a marriage proposal, (I had zero advance knowledge of this). I do believe I was justifiably upset with him.

Clearly, a communication breakdown at some point, but I'm really at a loss how to resolve this, & retain his friendship or how he could get things so wrong.

Rtp

 

[421]

I, however keep a personal life that has involved two long term r'ships, and I'm currently dating someone. This I keep to myself out of respect to him, and the feelings he has divulged toward me, and would've thought he must have some lady friends at some stage.

You need to re-evaluate what respect means.

Clearly, a communication breakdown at some point

Yes.

but I'm really at a loss how to resolve this, & retain his friendship or how he could get things so wrong.

You have to be honest and accept the fact that maybe you will lose the friendship but at least you won't be hurting him by leading him on.