draculic acid69
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U won't need a wheel filter with clean pharmaceutical quality liquids.
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BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic
Opioids Methadone take homes - fun things to do?
- Thread starter OpiateKiller
- Start date
draculic acid69
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If u want to get fukd up just have a few codeine tablets.
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I feel like this anecdote is pretty poignant, and I was actually thinking about this chick while writing my original post in this thread. Here we go!
So I met this girl, we will call her Jessica when I first moved up to Vermont a few years back. She was flying a sign on the main drag in Burlington, so I figured she could help me foster some new connections.
She was pretty much the bottom of that barrel known as addiction. Begging. Not showering. Sleeping under cardboard.
She ended up getting arrested with a bunch of Dope. She took that as a sign that things had gone too far. She got sober after a few slips.
Fast forward 2-3 years. She has been clean and sober for at least 2 years. She was working, went from no nothing to full-custody of her girls. Had a decent apartment of her own.
Well, when takehomes started going lax, she was quickly put on Biweeklies for her good behavior. Well money was tight I guess so she decided to bit the bullet and sell some to hopefully benefit her situation.
She had no plans to use whatsoever. She just wanted more money. One bad decision led to another and she found herself without Methadone for 8 days.
She ended up buying Heroin. "Just to function so I'm not too sick for my girls", which I get, but it still sucks. As far as I know she is now using dope everyday and had been for about a month.
She sells all her Methadone and uses the money to buy Heroin. It is so sad. She was just another junkie (like myself, no judgment) when I first met her. We went from middle-connection-acquaintance-friend I trust over a long period.
She just didn't look far enough into the future; how, as an addict, one bad decision can be the start of a chain reaction that leads to catastrophe.
We have all gotta be careful. We all use drugs. That is essentially what has brought us together. But HR teaches us that we dont have to be utterly self-destructive in order to use drugs. There is a middle way. Jess could have had her Opioids (Methadone) and still have a relatively great life.
I'm not claiming to be above any of this. It is easy to comment as an outsider. I thought this would be good food for thought.
So I met this girl, we will call her Jessica when I first moved up to Vermont a few years back. She was flying a sign on the main drag in Burlington, so I figured she could help me foster some new connections.
She was pretty much the bottom of that barrel known as addiction. Begging. Not showering. Sleeping under cardboard.
She ended up getting arrested with a bunch of Dope. She took that as a sign that things had gone too far. She got sober after a few slips.
Fast forward 2-3 years. She has been clean and sober for at least 2 years. She was working, went from no nothing to full-custody of her girls. Had a decent apartment of her own.
Well, when takehomes started going lax, she was quickly put on Biweeklies for her good behavior. Well money was tight I guess so she decided to bit the bullet and sell some to hopefully benefit her situation.
She had no plans to use whatsoever. She just wanted more money. One bad decision led to another and she found herself without Methadone for 8 days.
She ended up buying Heroin. "Just to function so I'm not too sick for my girls", which I get, but it still sucks. As far as I know she is now using dope everyday and had been for about a month.
She sells all her Methadone and uses the money to buy Heroin. It is so sad. She was just another junkie (like myself, no judgment) when I first met her. We went from middle-connection-acquaintance-friend I trust over a long period.
She just didn't look far enough into the future; how, as an addict, one bad decision can be the start of a chain reaction that leads to catastrophe.
We have all gotta be careful. We all use drugs. That is essentially what has brought us together. But HR teaches us that we dont have to be utterly self-destructive in order to use drugs. There is a middle way. Jess could have had her Opioids (Methadone) and still have a relatively great life.
I'm not claiming to be above any of this. It is easy to comment as an outsider. I thought this would be good food for thought.
iLoveYouWithaKnife
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Really? You e been given a ton of honest, real advice so far. It’s just what you are choosing to hear.
Eg.
YOU: I’m going to IV my ‘done.
Someone else: -no man, don’t IV your ‘done. It’ll be a waste.
YOU: /IV’d ‘done.
YOU: Well I don’t think I’ll IV my ‘done again. That was a waste.
OpiateKiller
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I have been given a lot of great advice, what he said just made sense to me. Is that ok?
You’re 100% right though! Let me just rewind to when I was 20 when Everyone on blue light told me stay away from Oxycodone. Problem solved! I’m not a drug addict anymore amen
iLoveYouWithaKnife
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explain.
OpiateKiller
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if addicted drug users were capable of taking others experience and accepting their experience and their own, the world would have no drug addicts, but obviously the human mind isn’t like that
iLoveYouWithaKnife
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I said explain for your instance. You said you weren’t a drug addict. And that people warned you years ago to stay away from oxy. Clearly you didn’t bc you were just asking about doubling your dose of methadone.
rave23
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Close friend of mine that I went through treatment with died of a Methadone OD. He was doing pretty well, and then one night decided to take an extra 20mg on top of his usual 40mg. I still have the text of him telling me he fucked up, he just wanted to get a little high, and that he struggles to stay awake. Well, I called three times and nobody picked up, so I called 911 and they found him cold and blue. And that was the end of that. Helluva funny and charismatic guy, snuffed out, by taking (allegedly) 1/3rd extra.
I've been in recovery long enough that these things don't shake me anymore. Yeah, I grieve, but live goes on. I met so many people in the rooms that just up and died, it's a real reality check for us addicts. It's arguably the worst part about being in recovery, that your friends never seem to live very long. Morbid as it sounds, I bought a nice suit, because I'm going to so many funerals that it's just cheaper to have my own than to rent it every time.
People I've known for years, see them every week, then one week they don't show up, and a short while later you get the memo, another one gone.
Tremendous relief it it's "just" a relapse. I don't care buddy, you're welcome back any time, at least you're alive, still breathing.
The treatment center I went to has a huge stone wall outside, with the name of patients that went there and later died, and every time I go back there to give the people still fighting some hope that it has a chance of working out, the list grows longer and longer. 80+ names added since 2016, soon they're going to need a bigger wall.
I've been in recovery long enough that these things don't shake me anymore. Yeah, I grieve, but live goes on. I met so many people in the rooms that just up and died, it's a real reality check for us addicts. It's arguably the worst part about being in recovery, that your friends never seem to live very long. Morbid as it sounds, I bought a nice suit, because I'm going to so many funerals that it's just cheaper to have my own than to rent it every time.
People I've known for years, see them every week, then one week they don't show up, and a short while later you get the memo, another one gone.
Tremendous relief it it's "just" a relapse. I don't care buddy, you're welcome back any time, at least you're alive, still breathing.
The treatment center I went to has a huge stone wall outside, with the name of patients that went there and later died, and every time I go back there to give the people still fighting some hope that it has a chance of working out, the list grows longer and longer. 80+ names added since 2016, soon they're going to need a bigger wall.
Ouch. Yeah, been struggling for a couple decades myself, and the fact is some of us are statistics, and some of us aren't. Really sorry about your friend. I take 55mg of methadone daily(this week) and it doesn't touch my cravings yet, much less relieve my withdrawal symptoms, but it's a hell of a lot better than the 25mg I started out on. Just talked to the doctor today to get my ceiling lifted to 80mg. Just started MMT, me and my husband, and we can go up 5mg every four days. It's been so long...seems like such a long time ago that 60mg would have taken me out...I really am sorry. Just another eye-opener to how fucked up I really am right now, reading about 60mg (allegedly) of methadone doing that to someone when I can drink 55mg of that disgusting red stuff in the bottom of the cup, not feel a DAMN thing, and still need another half gram of dope to make it thru the fuckin day til my next dose tomorrow without getting sick. I am really fuckin depressed right now. Damn.
