PT - fact is, yes u hav a right to b here esp as u r, IMO, in actual fact, in the early stages of meth addiction....
denial
however, like mia, i hav to admit it maddens me a bit to see u, after ppl r deeply and desperately wanting and trying to stop it, just talking about it like this is a 'social thread for speed users' - (
I've been doing it several times this week. My friend and I have been doing it while we are painting and cleaning his apartment. I'm too nice for my own good sometimes. lol I've worked as hard as he has there and I'm not even going to live there.
But we get more done spun and its better than doing it alone ya know.
Like I said I'm broke so I can't really afford it. Almost kinda, will work for my friends for drugs thing. Oh that sounds really bad.
But after he gets moved in he is going to have to be paying some major rent without a roommate yet and won't be able to afford it. So I think that will help a lot! I did talk to him last night that I thought after we get the apartment finished we should join together and leave the shards alone for awhile.
the point of this thread is for
meth/amphetamine addicts to support each other/advise each other and share experiences (
in a non-triggering way - ie.talking about the shit the drug has caused them rather than saying how much u like it!)
u will know this from reading the OP of the last thread (Version 1)
and its pointless if u dont take others advice too!
if u want to talk about how u enjoy meth use, im sure theres a suitable thread in OD/DC for this kind of talk
i gave u some worthwhile advice via PM but it wud seem it went in one ear and out the other
dont hide this from Sean, he doesnt deserve it
and go get some help - if u cant go without it uve got a problem
however if im talking to someone who doesnt take the help given to her u hav to wonder why u actually
do want to participate in this thread as were all here to desperately try and help each other.....
this thread isnt about 'there there im sorry to hear that ur having problems with addiction', its about offering/receiving advice/support/information
btw to evryone who thinks they can 'control' their meth use after being an addict, u guys r dreaming....im sorry but it wont happen
thats like an alcoholic giving up and then having the odd glass of wine.....which admittedly does very occasionally happen wen ppl get on top of it very strictly
except methamphetamine isnt alcohol, its much more harmful and addictive
its a nice thought but its as delusional as any other thinking we hav while up on the P
wingnut - thanks for the advice regarding amphetamine detox
however id like to stress that is
amphetamine detox as opposed to
methamphetamine detox
esp if ur here in NZ smoking/shooting the 80-100% pure (60% at the very least!) stuff heavily
some meth users here actually need medically supervised inpatient detox! a serious side effect of meth withdrawal is psychosis (usually in heavy users, certainly happens to me evry time i even come down now let alone detoxify)
but thats great advice for all u speedfreaks out there! thanks again hun
lefty - props to u mate....keep at it!
motiv - im curious as to wat u meant by 'is there such thing as legitimate adderall use?' in the US there is, if ur prescribed it AFAIK
finally, onto how im doing with Mistress P
well im on it now......coming down i guess actually cos ive managed to force down some soup/toast and am snacking on some cashews for protein (thanks again wingnut)
the problems surfacing with it again, not quite enough to say ive relapsed but getting to the point of needing help
sadly my drug counsellors moved to hamilton, another part of NZ (100km or so from auckland but no im not traveling that far to see her!!!)
im on the waiting list to start seeing the only other one whos had experience with IV heroin use (my other problem) therefore is the best choice for me
i talk a bit about it to my friend whos also battling to come off it and we try to come up with ways to stay clean - its pretty hard for me cos i get it free from the gang i used to work for
its like ill find any excuse to use (this morning it was cause Mum didnt wake me early enough to take my methadone at the desired time and i missed my hair appointment.....8()
then later i so regret it.....even just after the rush i was regretting it - i was looking at 'Bruce' the P pipe and how 'blackened' he was (of course hes not now...i spent all day scrubbing at him with a cotton bud and some methylated spirits - in a neurotic, have-to-make-sure-hes-100%-clean, way) and thinking how much i hated myself for being a P addict
the usual guilt, shame and memories came over me
im now looking into ibogaine
its not available via clinic here of course but i do hav a friend who got off methadone with it and reckoned itd work for my 3 addictions - methadone, valium and (of course) methamphetamine
im willing to try anything now - the time is ticking
its bn 10 yrs on that shit....i want to get on with my life
if one pill can save me from having to wait till im weaned slowly/painfully over 2 yrs off valium, fully stabilised for 6 months then slowly/painfully weaned off methadone over how many yrs before this rehab takes me (and it has an 80% success rate for P addicts - but wat if im not one of the 80%!!!! now thatd b a waste of 15000$$....one of my mates went there and relapsed.....on P, after all), then bring on the ibogaine i say!