Mental Dependency?

[King Tussin III]

Hello all, my goldfish has been really into drugs for the past year. He started drinking alcohol last year to cope with depression and then he tried acid. His first trip was amazing, he went to Austin with some friends and had one of the best days in his life. Since that day he began using numerous other psychedelic substances (Shrooms, weed, DXM, MDA, MDMA, RC's) and other drugs (Coke, meth, numerous opiates, benzos, adderall). He realized that using the same substance repeatedly would lead to pyschical dependency so he would use different substances every time. He used drugs heavily for months up until around october when he slowed down a lot and just stayed smoking ganja until around December when he began using benzos, opiates, and adderall again. Unfortunately he has realized that he can't seem to go long periods of time without getting this craving to get high off of something. The longest he has been sober for this past year is 3 weeks and it has gotten to the point where it is really bothering him. As of now he has been sober for about a week but he is beginning to get desperate for something to get high from. He knows he has an addictive personality as he was addicted to playing video games for most of his childhood and teen years until he got his first girlfriend lol. Anyways, everytime he does decide to go sober he always knows that he eventually will want to return to using something and he tends to feel more down and restless during this period (no pyschical withdrawl symptoms). The fish is always finding himself researching random info about drugs or talking about drugs with others (perhaps too much at times) and at this point he isn't sure if this is an obssession or a mental dependency. He would like to hear from anyone who is or has gone through a similiar experience, any advice would also be greatly appreciated.

 

[Burnt Offerings]

Are you using the drugs to self-medicate your depression, which you alluded to in the second sentence? If so that could be a problem.

That kind of varied drug use over year strikes me as a pattern of recreational usage, though...why are you uncomfortable with your use? Is it bringing negative repercussions to your life? Or do you just feel guilty about using drugs period, or the rate at which you're using drugs...?

 

[King Tussin III]

I used to think it was to cope with epression but after overcoming that part of my life it became apparent that I just enjoyed doing it. I've made some pretty terrible mistakes due to my habits that have cost me and my family a lot. They became aware of what I was doing late last year and are very concerned about it and have threatned to cut me off if I don't stop which makes me feel worthless because it makes me feel like a failure to them. I do want to stop using but at the same time I feel like I have learned a lot about myself through my experiences so I am very conflicted on that.

 

[johnnypotsmoker198]

I used to think it was to cope with epression but after overcoming that part of my life it became apparent that I just enjoyed doing it. I've made some pretty terrible mistakes due to my habits that have cost me and my family a lot. They became aware of what I was doing late last year and are very concerned about it and have threatned to cut me off if I don't stop which makes me feel worthless because it makes me feel like a failure to them. I do want to stop using but at the same time I feel like I have learned a lot about myself through my experiences so I am very conflicted on that.

Take your experiences you learned on psychedelics with you, but there is no benefit from an addiction to drug. If you are having issues staying busy and fighting any anxiety caused by being sober, try to find a hobby or something to keep your mind active.

I think you major issues will be finding a new source of entertainment, something that will keep you active and not going back to drug use.

Hobby's worked well for me, just browsing the local hobby shop and finding something to do. Anything to stay active, specifically in the first 3 months.

 

[herbavore]

It's also always useful to keep asking yourself, "what part of me is unfulfilled and what can I do to change that?" we are so used to looking at outside circumstances to deflect responsibility for defining our own lives. Sure, there is a lot we have no control over but usually the deeper pain is what we actually can influence if we can just turn and face it rather than spending our whole lives running from it (ourselves).