@Stupidk So what if a neurologist can diagnose you with hppd, it's pointless because you know what's going to improve it, exercise, time, healthy lifestyle habits, supplementation, etc. All a diagnosis will potentially do is confirm the incorrect theory that your vision is fucked up forever in your head. I encourage you to not have the test done.
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MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 7) [ALL LTC posts go here]
- Thread starter Tranced
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Whateverittakes90
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2018
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- 17
Hey guys I got some blood work done and my cortisol throughout the day (taken 4 times) showed it consistently low at every point. Essentially an andrenal burn out. I am waiting to see what the doc recommends but the fact that physiologically some markers are off gives me hope.
ZeroLuck
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2017
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- 372
What about the rest of your hormones? You've tested them too?
Whateverittakes90
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2018
- Messages
- 17
Yes. DHEA and testosterone is low for my age. Before taking mdma I was big on fitness and had considerable muscle and sex drive.
I will be taking bio identical hormones to push my body in the right direction
I will be taking bio identical hormones to push my body in the right direction
Whateverittakes90
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2018
- Messages
- 17
It?s getting increasing support in the medical field. I believe LTC can be a dysregulation of an assortment of hormones. My results seem to suggest it may be possible
Needhelp123
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2018
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interesting my hormones are all higher than normal, especially test and dhea. My sbgh was high as well, but I’m not concerned because my bio available T was in the upper range
Whateverittakes90
Greenlighter
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- Mar 22, 2018
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- 17
Did you test for cortisol? How is your sleep? The biggest aspect of my ltc was this incredible insomnia
Needhelp123
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2018
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- 136
Didnt test cortisol - but had every other test done. Should I ask my doc to test cortisol? My sleep is okay, not great but it doesn’t bother me. The visual/perceptual stuff is my issue. I wouldn’t even call it derealization because it’s not emotional. I think I may have a weird version of HPPD without the common symptoms because my issues feel highly visual. Even looking in the mirror is distorted. I feel like my eyes are now a few inches further I’m my head and I’m visually experiencing the world from a different (more extracted) point of view. it’s not emotional though it’s very physical. I’m afraid I have HPPD and I’m also afraid I will never have my old life back. The current shift is just too much for me to ever imagine becoming normal again.
Whateverittakes90
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2018
- Messages
- 17
I feel you brother. Hang in there. I?m 6 months in feeling slightly better. In time, I think we will recover.
Needhelp123
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2018
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- 136
I’m six months in too. Hoping for a full recovery for all of us. I was thinking about trying keppra or maybe kolonpin. I haven’t tried anything except ldn, but maybe it’s time.
ZeroLuck
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2017
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- 372
Today I've found out I've forgot to close the door for the cat and it was running around the house, (with possible access to the outside). When realized that (being super distracted, again cognitive worry) I got persistent anxiety again... for an hour now. Been OK for 2-3 weeks. :/
Looks like it's very psychological to me.
Looks like it's very psychological to me.
So I've been away for a while. Since august things where going really good. Could do a lot more work then before, although my brain was still dead. I didn't think about my ltc that often anymore.. Was happy with the progression. But the last 2 weeks have been as before, I'm so tired that I want to spend most of my time in bed. This new bad situation also gives me feelings of anxiety and depression. I don't know guys, can anyone relate to the extreme fatigue.. Working out doesn't make it better, my body is just exhausted... 1 year 9 months in now....
ShroomySatori
Bluelighter
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- Aug 24, 2015
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Dudes and whoever I feel for you as it seems like you are experiencing symptoms of post-acute withdrawal from a hard drug and years of abuse like heroin but it seems to happen overnight.
Like obviously in that case, you fried your brain for lack of better words just got super baked and pretty sure I have memory recall issues...
Anyways, the problem is not that you fucked your head up. It is how you deal with the stress of that because if you can then you will recover. If you allow it to destroy you, I don't know, you could end up something like me. After using an ounce of Md I became far more interested in hard drugs, I don't think I ever would have been exposed to them or interested at all if I never rolled.
It's weird though because the high, like just from the feeling of it, it's so damn good lol but you know like that shit has got to have repercussions. What I found personally is that the side effects came out within about a year after I stopped using it.
Anyone ever trigger symptoms of BPD using it? I mean, like going from a mellowed out stoner to cutting your wrists and chain toking bong trying to escape before finding some heroin that is pure enough for your standards to snort. Sort of scared to look up my nose thse days too..
What about symptoms of chronic pain? Low serotonin alone and neurotransmitter imbalance could easily have contributed to the onset of my ongoing 8 years of spinal agony. I think I mainly developed chronic pain from depression, I was depressed before Mdma though so would all of this have happened anyway? Probably, in one way or another. I was out to hurt myself over some pretty stupid reasons in hindsight. Hated myself. Fucking social anxiety man it's honestly a killer.
Last time I used Mdma was early this year but it was a lot of it. I realized that I can no longer control any drug other than weed after being a real drug addict and continuing to struggle. Or who knows? Maybe it's the emotional instability, volatility, and impulsivity I've experienced after heavy Mdma use long term? I feel like it is hard for a fried brain to evaluate itself. I mean, what if you felt like the way you do at your worst and there was a tiny little line that would make you feel like your good old self. That's what it was for me, but chronic physical agony was involved.
Only thing I'm certain of is the benzos have fucked my life up a lot more... but like for fucks sake. Why did I randomly pick up a panic disorder at 25. Would it have happened if I had never abused drugs to escape a couple problems that were torturing me. Probably. I'm probably just a little dumber now from the Mdma but who knows, it could have corroded a quarter of my brain away for all I know. Just keep a healthy lifestyle up (when you are fucked up I know this is really hard to do, take basic care of yourself can be a huge challenge like even eating three healthy meals a day and sleeping should be seen as an accomplishment)
- and you def will recover I'm tryna to say that you'll never know. The Mdma could have triggered an emotional problem you already had and had been ignoring, leading to physical and mental distress and also thinking it was from a night out on drugs and then the distress feeds on itself and grows and becomes more powerful over time. Both cases are possible. The Mdma might have been like, really hard on your body and just enough to take you over the brink into overstress. The brain damage could be affecting you but like alcohol is neurotoxic. Sure it could have been an impurity as well, there is no way of knowing if it was that one bad pill that time trust.
10 months off opiates and I am at the prime of my life and feel twice my age. I'm suicidal.
Like obviously in that case, you fried your brain for lack of better words just got super baked and pretty sure I have memory recall issues...
Anyways, the problem is not that you fucked your head up. It is how you deal with the stress of that because if you can then you will recover. If you allow it to destroy you, I don't know, you could end up something like me. After using an ounce of Md I became far more interested in hard drugs, I don't think I ever would have been exposed to them or interested at all if I never rolled.
It's weird though because the high, like just from the feeling of it, it's so damn good lol but you know like that shit has got to have repercussions. What I found personally is that the side effects came out within about a year after I stopped using it.
Anyone ever trigger symptoms of BPD using it? I mean, like going from a mellowed out stoner to cutting your wrists and chain toking bong trying to escape before finding some heroin that is pure enough for your standards to snort. Sort of scared to look up my nose thse days too..
What about symptoms of chronic pain? Low serotonin alone and neurotransmitter imbalance could easily have contributed to the onset of my ongoing 8 years of spinal agony. I think I mainly developed chronic pain from depression, I was depressed before Mdma though so would all of this have happened anyway? Probably, in one way or another. I was out to hurt myself over some pretty stupid reasons in hindsight. Hated myself. Fucking social anxiety man it's honestly a killer.
Last time I used Mdma was early this year but it was a lot of it. I realized that I can no longer control any drug other than weed after being a real drug addict and continuing to struggle. Or who knows? Maybe it's the emotional instability, volatility, and impulsivity I've experienced after heavy Mdma use long term? I feel like it is hard for a fried brain to evaluate itself. I mean, what if you felt like the way you do at your worst and there was a tiny little line that would make you feel like your good old self. That's what it was for me, but chronic physical agony was involved.
Only thing I'm certain of is the benzos have fucked my life up a lot more... but like for fucks sake. Why did I randomly pick up a panic disorder at 25. Would it have happened if I had never abused drugs to escape a couple problems that were torturing me. Probably. I'm probably just a little dumber now from the Mdma but who knows, it could have corroded a quarter of my brain away for all I know. Just keep a healthy lifestyle up (when you are fucked up I know this is really hard to do, take basic care of yourself can be a huge challenge like even eating three healthy meals a day and sleeping should be seen as an accomplishment)
- and you def will recover I'm tryna to say that you'll never know. The Mdma could have triggered an emotional problem you already had and had been ignoring, leading to physical and mental distress and also thinking it was from a night out on drugs and then the distress feeds on itself and grows and becomes more powerful over time. Both cases are possible. The Mdma might have been like, really hard on your body and just enough to take you over the brink into overstress. The brain damage could be affecting you but like alcohol is neurotoxic. Sure it could have been an impurity as well, there is no way of knowing if it was that one bad pill that time trust.
10 months off opiates and I am at the prime of my life and feel twice my age. I'm suicidal.
shouldvestayedhome
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2017
- Messages
- 113
^stay strong dude
Same thing here. 5+ years in. What did you do to fix it?
Guys, the biggest hope I have found is Cortene CT-38 drug. It's in trial. It's for chronic fatigue and the explanation makes the most sense of what happened to us.
Here's the explanation: https://www.healthrising.org/blog/2...ue-syndrome-me-cfs-pt-iii-the-clinical-trial/
Here's the explanation: https://www.healthrising.org/blog/2...ue-syndrome-me-cfs-pt-iii-the-clinical-trial/
Needhelp123
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2018
- Messages
- 136
Have any of your original symptoms improved?
Our LTCs are alike. Everything for me is what you describe, no physical symptoms.
While I'm posting, can anyone give any insight as to if the supplements tumeric, magnesium, and fish oil can be harmful to someone recovering from serotonin syndrome?
At this point I'm just assuming my LTC/cognitive problems are coming from SS and the down regulation or degeneration of serotonin receptors.