Someone13232
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2014
- Messages
- 84
basically its been a week now since i returned home from a festival, at which i went from friday-tuesday with no sleep, snorting constant amounts of cocaine, 4-mmc, pentedrone, speed, MDMA, i smoked DMT more than 5 times in a weekend and broke through a couple of those times (waking up on the floor nearly convulsing and being at a loss for words for ages) i also took a few valium/etizolams, drank some alcohol, spilt LSD on myself (i'd never intentionally ingest the stuff anymore) and smoking copious amounts of cannibis through the entire experience. i also had some ketamine and quetiapine and hydroxyzine, nearly forgot to throw those in.
and yeah, over 120 hours awake, got to the end and i had no desire to sleep. in the final 24 hours of the experience i realised i was at a mental state where drug intake no longer effected me, i was just fully awake and wired.
i stayed awake until i got back into town, went to my friends house to sleep off the comedown, but i didnt need to sleep, so i stayed up another night.
the following day i felt sober and normal all day after staying up for a long time, i got a normal nights sleep (midnight till 10:30am) and woke up feeling perfect. no cravings for nicotene, no comedown, no headache, bit of hunger, other than that i was happy.
i was also on citalopram for 2 months leading up to the weekend and stopped taking it 3 days beforehand. havent taken it since and havent felt any urges.
here i am 6 days from the first night i slept after the experience, ive been sleeping perfectly normally the last week, ive been getting genuinely tired at midnight every night (something i havent felt in YEARS, since i was a kid), ive been getting genuine hunger, again something im not used to..
i had a bong hit 3 days ago (first since i returned) and it FUCKED ME UP. i got a headache, felt like i smoked an 8th in 30 seconds, nearly greened out, stumbled home and didnt make it to bed. havent wanted any more weed since then.
WHY IS THIS?
i feel like a new person, im living a real life without the constant cravings for nicotene/cannibis, i can eat normally whenever i want, i can sleep as soon as i feel tired, and i feel like my friends are a bunch of stoners who sit around chatting shit all day.
ive had none of the anxiety thats plagued me as long as i remember (since long before i started smoking), i can talk to anyone about anything, i can approach women and chat and smile and not awkwardly stand there mumbling looking like a wierdo.
have i just cracked or something? whats the deal... full on reawakening, its like there is NOTHING NEGATIVE IN THE WORLD ANYMORE.
ive been drinking tea and eating curries and shit too, not been craving pizza and cola whenever i get those rare bits of hunger cannibis would occasionally reward me with...
i hope i stay like this.. has anyone else had or heard of similar experiences? yesterday i almost got a job for fucks sake... something ive felt no motivation to do EVER
has my brain just got bored of the cannibis life and put it to an abrupt end using my drug fuelled bender as a punctuation point?
and i dont want people thinking i was just a bit of a weak minded stoner beforehand too.. i was DEPENDANT on cannibis.. 2 days without cannibis meant 2 days without eating, sleeping or happiness (allbeit fake). ive been arrested for doing retarded impulsive things to get my fix, ive been thrown out and lived in squats because of my refusal to stop smoking in my mums house, ive robbed friends etc, all the junkieish things no one is proud of. before last week, i went from the age of 15 to 20 without going more than 2 days without smoking weed. i missed exams at school, i dissappeared at night time during family holidays to go and find some weed in the streets of foreign countries (never failing to score).
i never understood how older raver types would say things like "nah man i cant handle skunk anymore it makes me sick and crazy, abused it too much as a kid" i thought they just lied because they cant handle the potent weed the new kids smoke and dont wanna get shown up. but seriously im on the same wavelength now, no more chemical intake for me. (asides occasional experimentation with novel substances, and maybe more DMT)
and yeah, over 120 hours awake, got to the end and i had no desire to sleep. in the final 24 hours of the experience i realised i was at a mental state where drug intake no longer effected me, i was just fully awake and wired.
i stayed awake until i got back into town, went to my friends house to sleep off the comedown, but i didnt need to sleep, so i stayed up another night.
the following day i felt sober and normal all day after staying up for a long time, i got a normal nights sleep (midnight till 10:30am) and woke up feeling perfect. no cravings for nicotene, no comedown, no headache, bit of hunger, other than that i was happy.
i was also on citalopram for 2 months leading up to the weekend and stopped taking it 3 days beforehand. havent taken it since and havent felt any urges.
here i am 6 days from the first night i slept after the experience, ive been sleeping perfectly normally the last week, ive been getting genuinely tired at midnight every night (something i havent felt in YEARS, since i was a kid), ive been getting genuine hunger, again something im not used to..
i had a bong hit 3 days ago (first since i returned) and it FUCKED ME UP. i got a headache, felt like i smoked an 8th in 30 seconds, nearly greened out, stumbled home and didnt make it to bed. havent wanted any more weed since then.
WHY IS THIS?
i feel like a new person, im living a real life without the constant cravings for nicotene/cannibis, i can eat normally whenever i want, i can sleep as soon as i feel tired, and i feel like my friends are a bunch of stoners who sit around chatting shit all day.
ive had none of the anxiety thats plagued me as long as i remember (since long before i started smoking), i can talk to anyone about anything, i can approach women and chat and smile and not awkwardly stand there mumbling looking like a wierdo.
have i just cracked or something? whats the deal... full on reawakening, its like there is NOTHING NEGATIVE IN THE WORLD ANYMORE.
ive been drinking tea and eating curries and shit too, not been craving pizza and cola whenever i get those rare bits of hunger cannibis would occasionally reward me with...
i hope i stay like this.. has anyone else had or heard of similar experiences? yesterday i almost got a job for fucks sake... something ive felt no motivation to do EVER
has my brain just got bored of the cannibis life and put it to an abrupt end using my drug fuelled bender as a punctuation point?
and i dont want people thinking i was just a bit of a weak minded stoner beforehand too.. i was DEPENDANT on cannibis.. 2 days without cannibis meant 2 days without eating, sleeping or happiness (allbeit fake). ive been arrested for doing retarded impulsive things to get my fix, ive been thrown out and lived in squats because of my refusal to stop smoking in my mums house, ive robbed friends etc, all the junkieish things no one is proud of. before last week, i went from the age of 15 to 20 without going more than 2 days without smoking weed. i missed exams at school, i dissappeared at night time during family holidays to go and find some weed in the streets of foreign countries (never failing to score).
i never understood how older raver types would say things like "nah man i cant handle skunk anymore it makes me sick and crazy, abused it too much as a kid" i thought they just lied because they cant handle the potent weed the new kids smoke and dont wanna get shown up. but seriously im on the same wavelength now, no more chemical intake for me. (asides occasional experimentation with novel substances, and maybe more DMT)
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