Hi Bluelight.
So four weeks ago, exactly one month ago, SWIM and I took two tabs. We tripped pretty hard, at least harder than we ever had before, and we came down in about four to five hours. Then, we got stoned, and MEGA tripped for the rest of the night. Not like any level 4 psychedelic experience stuff, but at least pretty hard for what it was. I was scared of him kinda, and I felt like a cube, lots of stuff. The weeks following I definitely felt extremely sober, it didn't have any lasting effects.
Two weeks ago was the last time I dropped acid, with the same SWIM. It was about my fourthish time in the span of about four or five weeks. The weekend after, however, I got my hands on some MDMA. The dude was pretty trustworthy and it was in rock form, so I thought the chances were that it was indeed (at least mostly) pure MDMA. We each took .25g, and we got pretty much the classic experience. The day after, I fell down with an EXTREME depression which lasted about 15 minutes. I got over it, and kinda picked up my personality in the right order afterwards.
The week following, I didn't have any identity problems - I felt pretty much me. I did a bunch of drugs that week, but I honestly don't think they long-term affected my brain. I got stoned on Tuesday (off of some indica - didn't get too trippy, besides the after-effects of MDMA still being present), took a small dosage of Oxycodone on Monday I think, Adderall, daydrinking, and some caffeine pills on Wednesday, Thursday was sober and then I got a different strain of weed to smoke for Friday. Nothing was really wavy, visual perception was still spot on, time was still pretty okay, and my thought patterns were all coming back to baseline.
I honestly feel like all of those drugs^ didn't affect my brain permanently as much as this fucking weed did. Friday, the same SWIM and I got stoned in the woods, and the acid trip that we had not two, but FOUR weeks prior, came back in a smaller form. Our sensations were the same pretty much the same, (My sense of touch blended pretty hard with its surroundings, and SWIM saw patterns). Since they were technically both weed-induced trips, it made sense: any underlying habits our brain formed the first time got brought out again four weeks later by some crazy sativa. Honestly, like retards, we didn't really think much of it. The next night, we got more stoned off of the same shit, and we tripped pretty damn hard for just some weed. It fucked with our personalities, made me different and it made him different. He was less bubbly and more demanding and shit, and I was just kinda off. During that high is when I decided I needed to be sober.
Now, I've been sober since that Saturday night, technically Sunday morning. I've read a lot of forums on MDMA after effects and LSD after effects. Keep in mind, I did LSD weekly for about five weeks before the MDMA, and the after effects didn't occur until the last time I smoked weed. The after effects I'm getting are:
My visual perception is a little off. Lines are very very very subtly wavy, big scapes kind of breathe, and I just don't really process my vision as heavily as I did before - very similar to basic acid visuals.
My perception of time is off. Time is going by a bit too quickly, as if the memories I'm making are processing just as well, but again, the heaviness isn't there as much as it was.
I have confusing thought patterns. I kind of feel like I am a part of the trip still, but sober, and my brain doesn't ever get centered. Like, y'know when you trip, you can kind of anchor yourself back sometimes, from a bad trip? Remind yourself that you're only tripping, and then you get centered again, but right when the centering happens, you kinda just go off on another trippy path? That's how it is for me, except kinda really longterm and broad. Like schizophrenic mood swings kind of. Could be described as just getting anxious, confused, or depressed often, and the happy times are less happy - but it still does feel awfully acid-y.
Lastly, closely related to that last symptom^, my core sense of identity is really lost. Like, if I said "I am Aire" before the MDMA, I would've known exactly what I meant. Even on that next Friday before the weed, I would've known what I meant. It would've been kinda trippy, but I would've known, and felt like Aire. Now, I say "I am Aire" and I don't really feel all of the Aire-y things I felt before. This symptom feels more like it's coming from the MDMA.
I'm on Day 6 of my sobriety now and wondering if anyone has any experiences that are parallel to mine, or MDMA/LSD comedowns that they can relate to mine that will give me a heads up as to what to expect, or how to treat it: medications, nutrition, anything. Contrary to how it sounds, I am pretty fucking desperate to regain a baseline feeling. Looking for moral support as well, don't like the feeling of being trapped here.
Thanks dudes.
So four weeks ago, exactly one month ago, SWIM and I took two tabs. We tripped pretty hard, at least harder than we ever had before, and we came down in about four to five hours. Then, we got stoned, and MEGA tripped for the rest of the night. Not like any level 4 psychedelic experience stuff, but at least pretty hard for what it was. I was scared of him kinda, and I felt like a cube, lots of stuff. The weeks following I definitely felt extremely sober, it didn't have any lasting effects.
Two weeks ago was the last time I dropped acid, with the same SWIM. It was about my fourthish time in the span of about four or five weeks. The weekend after, however, I got my hands on some MDMA. The dude was pretty trustworthy and it was in rock form, so I thought the chances were that it was indeed (at least mostly) pure MDMA. We each took .25g, and we got pretty much the classic experience. The day after, I fell down with an EXTREME depression which lasted about 15 minutes. I got over it, and kinda picked up my personality in the right order afterwards.
The week following, I didn't have any identity problems - I felt pretty much me. I did a bunch of drugs that week, but I honestly don't think they long-term affected my brain. I got stoned on Tuesday (off of some indica - didn't get too trippy, besides the after-effects of MDMA still being present), took a small dosage of Oxycodone on Monday I think, Adderall, daydrinking, and some caffeine pills on Wednesday, Thursday was sober and then I got a different strain of weed to smoke for Friday. Nothing was really wavy, visual perception was still spot on, time was still pretty okay, and my thought patterns were all coming back to baseline.
I honestly feel like all of those drugs^ didn't affect my brain permanently as much as this fucking weed did. Friday, the same SWIM and I got stoned in the woods, and the acid trip that we had not two, but FOUR weeks prior, came back in a smaller form. Our sensations were the same pretty much the same, (My sense of touch blended pretty hard with its surroundings, and SWIM saw patterns). Since they were technically both weed-induced trips, it made sense: any underlying habits our brain formed the first time got brought out again four weeks later by some crazy sativa. Honestly, like retards, we didn't really think much of it. The next night, we got more stoned off of the same shit, and we tripped pretty damn hard for just some weed. It fucked with our personalities, made me different and it made him different. He was less bubbly and more demanding and shit, and I was just kinda off. During that high is when I decided I needed to be sober.
Now, I've been sober since that Saturday night, technically Sunday morning. I've read a lot of forums on MDMA after effects and LSD after effects. Keep in mind, I did LSD weekly for about five weeks before the MDMA, and the after effects didn't occur until the last time I smoked weed. The after effects I'm getting are:
My visual perception is a little off. Lines are very very very subtly wavy, big scapes kind of breathe, and I just don't really process my vision as heavily as I did before - very similar to basic acid visuals.
My perception of time is off. Time is going by a bit too quickly, as if the memories I'm making are processing just as well, but again, the heaviness isn't there as much as it was.
I have confusing thought patterns. I kind of feel like I am a part of the trip still, but sober, and my brain doesn't ever get centered. Like, y'know when you trip, you can kind of anchor yourself back sometimes, from a bad trip? Remind yourself that you're only tripping, and then you get centered again, but right when the centering happens, you kinda just go off on another trippy path? That's how it is for me, except kinda really longterm and broad. Like schizophrenic mood swings kind of. Could be described as just getting anxious, confused, or depressed often, and the happy times are less happy - but it still does feel awfully acid-y.
Lastly, closely related to that last symptom^, my core sense of identity is really lost. Like, if I said "I am Aire" before the MDMA, I would've known exactly what I meant. Even on that next Friday before the weed, I would've known what I meant. It would've been kinda trippy, but I would've known, and felt like Aire. Now, I say "I am Aire" and I don't really feel all of the Aire-y things I felt before. This symptom feels more like it's coming from the MDMA.
I'm on Day 6 of my sobriety now and wondering if anyone has any experiences that are parallel to mine, or MDMA/LSD comedowns that they can relate to mine that will give me a heads up as to what to expect, or how to treat it: medications, nutrition, anything. Contrary to how it sounds, I am pretty fucking desperate to regain a baseline feeling. Looking for moral support as well, don't like the feeling of being trapped here.
Thanks dudes.