Just don't know !!! :)

S

SpecilKNY

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 4, 1999
Messages
3,729
Well I always read long posts that you guys put on and sit and envy - why don't I have anything interesting to post - well now I have .
A bit background - I moved from israel a few month ago to the USA which is a hard move and you leave all your friends behind - someone like me who left house when 17 - dad left when I was 5 didn't really know what Love is and being Loved is
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then I ran across Bluelight - I don't even remmember how - at first i checked out all the pill reports then the messages and then i started meeting people - the first time i met peopel (tigger,tshirt,drgnfly,climber,sunflower) I really understood the meaning of PLUR !! Bluelighters is my family now !!!
well back to the story and how it has to do with anything .. last night i went to Silly Potty 3 - from NYC - Eddie - a fellow bluelighter which i never met in my life came to pick me up from home !! (I love you guy) and he came with to friends.
We arrived there at 12:30 a.m and the cops were at the door - not letting anyone inside and saying the party ends at 2 - well we tried looking for something to do - but reqally couldn't find, eddie's friends has made arrangments to chill out with a girl in a small town in Conn - so we joined hem - after picking a few pills - from the kulest girl - who's her name i can't remmember !!
after driving forever we finally arrived in this small town in Conn (there was a cow and horse around when we got there - the coolest thing) - there we met this girl J - and her sister Jes and we dropped a few pills and took some Tabs (2 + 1) every one of us !! the weird thing is that he's friend never met this girl - he knows her threw the net - and we came four people to her house and had a great time - today afternoon - they were in a hurry so they dropped me down in the train station somewhere in upstate NY - who remmembers and i got home .
now why i wrote all this - as i said i never felt love - but yesterday while candy flipping (i usaully like to play mind games - put heads together and try to connect) i totally connected with Jes - it was like she took the trip with me - and when it ended - we both felt awsome like this weird connection iv'e known her forever - i done this a lot of times - this never happend b4 !!!
One prob - jes is 15 !!! i'm 23 - i sware nothing sexualy happend and i didn't even think that way (so no coming down on me) but I can't get this girl out of my mind she is amazing !! - what should I do ???? Help Please
Bluelighters - I love you all and i promise i will make every effort i can to meet as many as possible - this is my family and i love you guys !!!
Plur (and totally understanding it for first time in my life )
K
 
hey Kman,
glad to hear that you had a great time and i don't have words to express about how nice the nyc crew is.
now the age issue there. I guess that if you guys were older like if she was over 21 or at least close to it then a 8 year age difference would be totally acceptable. But i think that now, at this time it wouldn't really be. I'm not trying to put you down or anything on this... i mean i think its f/g awesome that you found somebody that you connect so well with... that is really a special thing when you feel like that. I've felt it before once in my life...((long story))
anyways, i'm not gonna tell push to either side whether do it or don't do it... but as a friend all i can say is ...whatever you decide on doode.. i'm there to support you.
hey don't forget this friday...!!!!and saturday...!!!
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PLURness
from...
Buzzin*DrgnFly
{{LUV YA NYC, PA CREW}}
 
hmmm, why dont you see if you connect with her on a sober basis? connections always happen when i am rolling but i suspect most of time there would be no connection at all sober. is she a young 15 or old 15? i mean if she is gonna be 16 soon and you are 23 thats not too bad 7 years. you are talking fun right? I am 20 21 in like 2 weeks, and have always dated older guys.. point is that if she acts 15 you prolly dont want her, but if she acts older then she can probably handle being with an older guy. keep us updated!
 
Well she is midd 15 and i just turned 23 - but thats still doesn't make it right in any way....
about talking to her sober - I will but i talked to her a lot that night and she is definatlly not mentally 15 - she is so much older in that way you tend to forget her age by talking to her ...
the question here is not if anything will happen between us - cause it won't no matter what but if it's a good idea to stay friends or just to forget the hole thing ..
well i'm at work - totally sober and still confused - so help please
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Plur
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SpecialK - If you thought thats a hole wait till you see my flat :)
 
AS your Doctor I have to say that the fact that you see a potential problem here is kudos to your ability to accurately judge a situation, considering how you are feeling. First of all, age is not a reasonable qualification for friendship. Within Ma own, we have never used that as a guideline for making or not making friends. You shouldn't either. You are experiencing a feeling, also very good. Now, I don't mean to down play the significance of this occurrence and I would say this bout any intensely shared experience and the residual feelings there after. Just give this the one thing you have, time. Take the time to figure out who this person is and what your real feelings are. You are still reeling for the Experience. Let the dust settle and see what the emotional land scape looks like. Maybe it will look different again tomorrow.
PLUR! and BlueSkies!
 
well if you dont see anything going further dont sell yourself short on having a new friend just because she is 15 thats just silly and lame. what are you confused about? if its ok to be her friend? tell us what all yer confusion is about specifically now that you have established you dont want anything to go further.
::kudos:: x2k
 
first Doc and X2K thanx for the help ..
my confusion - I have no idea and can't even try to imagine what she is feeling I know i'm responsible enough to leave things as friendship but there were times that I felt it was getting sexualy tense - and I immediatly stopped it - but The last thing i want to do is break this amazing girls hart - she is just to perfect to get hurt !!
I didn't take her number but left her mine - i wanted her to think about things and if she feels she wants friendship she will give me a call - i knew that if I had her number i would call - and I don't want to effect her desicion - I had the feeling when i left she was confused enough about it
well I just hope she calls !! I would really love to meet her again .. I don't know how - she does do Acid but doesn't go to raves (she's too young) and she lives in Conn .. Well I guess that will be the last problem
Plur
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SpecialK - If you thought thats a hole wait till you see my flat :)
 
all you can do my friend is wait i guess.. when you talk to her let her know what you feel and why you feel like that.. dont break her heart just have an incredible friendship!
 
Hey K it's me... let me know when she calls, oh and don't worry bout the ride... my pleasure... sorry we kinda had to bail you sunday
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... it's was a crazy weekend to say the least, not one I'll soon forget... keep it real, PLUR...
EddiE
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"ya got the househeads, breakbeat junkies, drum and base purists, hardhouse people and all the ravers across america."
 
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