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Jealous Girlfriend

Now she's just left her therapist's office and is going to start going to NA. She said she never realized that she had a problem with drugs until today. I really hope this isn't just another ploy to get back together but I promised her to be there throughout the whole experience, and I know the tragic underside to benzo addiction. I've seen too many ppl go through it. I want her to have a strong support system so as not to fall back into her old pill popping habits. Her best, and only, friend is the same way so I see this being a very difficult transition. My best friend was prescribed to xanax for 4 years and recently I got him to trip for the first time (on HBWR seeds) and his experience was so profound that he told me "I found myself. I saw myself. I miss myself." Since then he hasn't done a benzo or drank (or taken any drug for that matter)... So hopefully I gain insight from him on how to handle this situation.
 
Id stay friends, but I wouldnt really be all into her drug recovery. I fucking hate 12 step programs in the sense in being around them. Some people need them. But your so young man. You should just move on. This girl is soooo lame. I know you love her now, but if I was a betting man, Id say you would feel that way about alot of woman throughout your life. Hell they will probly be cooler. This gal sounds like a serious drag. You owe it to yourself to just let her be and go do your own thing. You should talk later, its good to have a character witness or job referenvce, or a friend who can help you out, but dont be her doormat or emotional support system. You know how they say if you love something to let it go. Let it go, you know.
 
Ummm so, I come home from work to a really big card that says on the front... "I Love You..." And then the inside said "That is all." -Love Olivia xoxo.... It was super sweet and needless to say, we're back together, again. But I will not show the same level of affection as I have in the past, in light of the she acknowledges that I technically love her more than she loves me.
 
You guys have been great help. I swear, very insightful. I'm just being selfish... A drug addict addicted to love. =/
 
^You're not being selfish, you're just in love and have been with her for an incredibly long time. So many people stick with unhappy relationships because they're just afraid of finding themselves single/ can't remember what life without that other person was like - don't blame yourself for it but don't make that mistake and end up regretting it later, either. I stayed in a miserable relationship for a good year after it had turned bad just because I was too scared of the alternative, and I can assure you it just ended up hurting me more in the long run.
Just be sure this girl's really worth it.
 
Pagey <3, you're amazing. Thanks for all the advice. I think I finally see where I stand. And I thibk she's totally worth it. I think I honestly just need to back off a bit. I need her to see my trust in her. She needs to realize what we have, and if she can't do that, its gonna be deuces.
 
Ok so she came over to stay the night... Left to go sell this guy some pills, that I already know likes her... She gave him a ride home. When she left she said I'll be back in 20 minutes... 2 hours later she says they're still deep in conversation and that I should just go to bed. So I told her that I loved her but this isn't worth it. Blocked her from all social networking and my cell phone. I'm not a chump.

**Please note... I don't care whether she cheated or not... Not the issue, but the blantant disregard for my emotions is unacceptable. I gave up 6 hours extra at work (4 overtime, and I love my job cooking!) to spend this night with her and she says that I should just go to sleep because she's still in deep conversation with this guy (whom is a dumbass and alcoholic)... Haven't seen her in 4 days and she pulls this shit.
 
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Now if only I could stop being a superficial dumbass and go for a girl with personality regardless of looks. But I feel without physical attraction a relationship will fail.
 
I think you will be fine if you respect yourself a bit. Everyone on here has told you your relationship is fucked and everytime you post I think "If I was that dude Id be done". So what if your single a bit. Work on your self esteem and get in shape. Go get a job or werent you thinking of the marines. That would be kickass. You would get alot of pussy being a marine. Chicks go for guys in the army cuz you make money and are in shape. So go live your life man. Sounds like you have stuck around your hometown too long after high school.
 
After high school I left state for a year... I recently moved back home after 2 years gone... Hence this 2 year break up. I'm in great shape. I have a 40+ hour a week job. I'm in an amazing place right now. I woke with almost no stress. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. The best thing imo for me to do right now, is to have fun. Spend time with friends. And stay away from girls, I always confuse attention for love because girls never wanna talk to me, but I've recently learned its because my looks are intimidating (in a good way?). I refuse to play games and I think I've learned a lot here. My confidence is up. My stress is down. I think I'm going to enjoy being single.
 
Just an update... Still haven't talked to her very much. I was talking to her for a little while before she asked my best friend to have sex with her about a month ago. He showed me the texts and I haven't takes to her since. I wasted so Much time of my life and love on a person like this please don't make the same mistake I did.
 
Kaveman i see this situation arise with alot of my ex girlfriends, vindictive, spiteful, jealous, controllive, hated me tripping but would gladly get pissed and cause me a horrible night :/ i mean i think i have met one girl in my life that i got very close too, n she still fucked me over, i think i always choose the wrong type of girls, and then when i do choose the right type of lass, she isn't for me, i feel i have wasted almost 9 years with 3 seperate women, and one has come close too love, i feel similar traits to your situation right not, my gf is only 21, very much is making it obvious she doesnt want to be with me though, denies all knowledge it yet shows no effort, this girl i have been dating over a year and i still dont know her, i am yet to find the right type of girl for me and im 25, broke, haave an etizolam habit, addicted to plo cash games :/, im a mess :/ ... cnt hit much lower!

But with that sense of feeling i cant hit much lower there is a middle ground, i feel like like the only way is up (as cliche as it might sound :/)

I definitely feel you should stop contacting her altogether, people like that can scar you in future relationships and most definitely have :( ..

Just a tip, dont go rushing into anything with anyone, take things easy, jumping in the sack didnt make me feel any better, nor did it boost my ego or self esteem (i hate one night stands though) some people like my mate, do that sort of thing , to get over a lass, i find it a silly path to take, but i understand everyone has different ways of "getting over someone"

There is always a thing that ended with my previous relationships that made me say "right im never going back there again" there is a line a certain limit u can get pushed too , so far, u fall out of love with them completely, and begin hating them, if u feel u want to talk some more im always around for a pm or chat :) , much regards, bare_head
 
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It's something how your feelings can change in a short while isn't it? Damn, I think it's a good thing you gave yourself some space. Now you know what sort of person this girl really is. Glad your friend showed restraint, told her no and told you the truth. That doesn't make it any easier for you but it will all work out in the end.

You deserve so much better and I am confident you're well on your way to finding a better relationship. You trusted your instincts and knew in your heart something wasn't right. Always listen to your intuition! Thanks for updating and you know we're always here for you. <3
 
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