Just some quick background:
I've been using opioids for a total of ten years now. I started out using IV heroin. The first two years my tolerance always stayed low and i could always attain the high i sought with a tenth or two tops. During my second year of using heroin i stumbled upon a hook up for solid, rocked up, chunky heroin. My tolerance quikly went up and by year four i ended up getting on methadone because i couldnt afford my habit anymore. I stated on methadone for five years, kicking it twice during that time prior to the kick that made me get off it for good. That entire time i was on the clinic i chased the heroin high, to no avail as anyone who has ever been on methadone knows. In 2010 i started on the pain clinic for a few herniated discs in my lower back and fell into the roxicodone craze. I was running through bottles of 180 tablets in 5 or 6 days. I got back on methadone again to get off the roxis. In august 2010 i contracted an infection that landed in my hip joint, a disease known as septic arthritis. The infection ate all the cartilage in my right hip in 8 weeks. I had emergency surgery and was left with bone on bone femur and pelvis. I stayed on methadonetill January of 2011, when i was arrested and sentenced to a year of state prison. I kicked methadone in jail and vowed to never get on it again. Now before going to prison, i could easily clear teo or three grams of dope a day. Coming out of prison, i assumed my tolerance would be completely gone and it would be like starting over again. Well the first day out i did a gram, and within a week was chasing a monstrous habit again. In january of this year i finally started seeing a legit pain specialist, as the seriousness of my hip disease allows me to goto any doctor and get basically anything i want. I got on dilaudid and was given 56 mg a day. Well needless to say, i could run through 120 4 mg tablets in about 3 days and spend another week killing the 16mg exalgos (ER hydromorphone). I recently, as in two weeks ago, switched to morphine sulfate and was scripted 2x 200mg er tablets a day and 3x 30mg ir tablets day. I had hoped if i did a two hundred in the morning, a 90mg ir shot in the afternoon, and another 200mg at night id be straight. Well i already have found myself doing these 200mg tablets nearly back to back. I can easily run through 2 grams of these no problem and am no longer getting any rush from a 200mg shot.
I am dying to start getting actually high off opiates again without the aid of a potentiating drug like benzos, but it almost feels like it will never happen. Im wasting my pills just getting well it seems like and never getting high. Does anyone have experience with lowering such a high tolerance comfortably and keeping it at a managable level, while still being able to catch that hazy noddy high i dream of? I literally cannot even remember the last time i caught a nod... And i have been consuming enough opiates for a small army. Somebody point me in the right direction. Not to mention i have literally no viable veins left. Both of my arms are shot, except the hands which blow out when shooting 3ml+ liquid in them a few times a day. Ive resorted to some rather strange places to push off and many a congealed bloody shot has been squirted in my mouth struggling to find a hit. Then of course i load up another swearing ill find it this time, and dont give up till i do.
Please, i dont want to hear the usual stop using etc responses. Im a chronic pain patient who requires opiates to ambulate regardless of whether or not im getting high on them.
I've been using opioids for a total of ten years now. I started out using IV heroin. The first two years my tolerance always stayed low and i could always attain the high i sought with a tenth or two tops. During my second year of using heroin i stumbled upon a hook up for solid, rocked up, chunky heroin. My tolerance quikly went up and by year four i ended up getting on methadone because i couldnt afford my habit anymore. I stated on methadone for five years, kicking it twice during that time prior to the kick that made me get off it for good. That entire time i was on the clinic i chased the heroin high, to no avail as anyone who has ever been on methadone knows. In 2010 i started on the pain clinic for a few herniated discs in my lower back and fell into the roxicodone craze. I was running through bottles of 180 tablets in 5 or 6 days. I got back on methadone again to get off the roxis. In august 2010 i contracted an infection that landed in my hip joint, a disease known as septic arthritis. The infection ate all the cartilage in my right hip in 8 weeks. I had emergency surgery and was left with bone on bone femur and pelvis. I stayed on methadonetill January of 2011, when i was arrested and sentenced to a year of state prison. I kicked methadone in jail and vowed to never get on it again. Now before going to prison, i could easily clear teo or three grams of dope a day. Coming out of prison, i assumed my tolerance would be completely gone and it would be like starting over again. Well the first day out i did a gram, and within a week was chasing a monstrous habit again. In january of this year i finally started seeing a legit pain specialist, as the seriousness of my hip disease allows me to goto any doctor and get basically anything i want. I got on dilaudid and was given 56 mg a day. Well needless to say, i could run through 120 4 mg tablets in about 3 days and spend another week killing the 16mg exalgos (ER hydromorphone). I recently, as in two weeks ago, switched to morphine sulfate and was scripted 2x 200mg er tablets a day and 3x 30mg ir tablets day. I had hoped if i did a two hundred in the morning, a 90mg ir shot in the afternoon, and another 200mg at night id be straight. Well i already have found myself doing these 200mg tablets nearly back to back. I can easily run through 2 grams of these no problem and am no longer getting any rush from a 200mg shot.
I am dying to start getting actually high off opiates again without the aid of a potentiating drug like benzos, but it almost feels like it will never happen. Im wasting my pills just getting well it seems like and never getting high. Does anyone have experience with lowering such a high tolerance comfortably and keeping it at a managable level, while still being able to catch that hazy noddy high i dream of? I literally cannot even remember the last time i caught a nod... And i have been consuming enough opiates for a small army. Somebody point me in the right direction. Not to mention i have literally no viable veins left. Both of my arms are shot, except the hands which blow out when shooting 3ml+ liquid in them a few times a day. Ive resorted to some rather strange places to push off and many a congealed bloody shot has been squirted in my mouth struggling to find a hit. Then of course i load up another swearing ill find it this time, and dont give up till i do.
Please, i dont want to hear the usual stop using etc responses. Im a chronic pain patient who requires opiates to ambulate regardless of whether or not im getting high on them.